The Phantom's Doing
by A-Shadow
Summary: Partly post endgame. After seven years in the Delta Quadrant, the Phantom brings with him a realization. This is Janeway/Seven FEMSLASH, don't like it? You don't have to come inside.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer 1: Star Trek Voyager and its characters are the property of Paramount Pictures. I'm just taking them for a ride because I like things that can go really fast. No bodily harm was inflicted to Chakotay upon the writing of this story. Well, not much...

Disclaimer 2: The Phantom of the Opera along with its characters and lyrics belong to Andrew Lloyd Webber and probably some other people, but sadly, I'm not one of them. If I was, I'd be rich.

Rating: R for the series

Spoilers: Heavy Endgame spoilers

Author's Notes 1: I want to take a moment to thank my beta Chandi, who despite various problems with her comp managed to break the warp 10 barrier as she beta'ed this fic.

Author's Notes 2: Blame, and thanks, also goes out to three others (you know who you are!) who not only managed to keep a straight face when I asked the most important questions, like 'what color goes good... I mean - well, with green?' but actually give several answers and visuals to get me writing again.

* * *

Light blue eyes blinked into the darkness as the woman looked up at the ceiling above her bed. "Computer, time?"

"The time is 0512 hours." Sighing deeply, Captain Kathryn Janeway sat up, throwing the covers off her body and stretching. Tonight was the third consecutive night she had not been able to sleep for more then two hours, and it was starting to take its toll on her. She felt herself becoming more and more short-tempered, irritable, and rash. _Maybe I should head to sickbay. I've never suffered from insomnia this badly before._ Standing up and rolling her shoulders only to hear a telltale 'pop', she made up her mind – _after the shift_. It was less then 20 minutes later that she stepped into the mess hall, her command mask firmly in place as she greeted the staff members that looked up to catch her eye with a nod.

They had been in the Delta Quadrant for over half a decade now, and the people knew the character that was their captain well, and in this case she was glad for it: she could get her cup of coffee in peace.

"Good morning, Captain!" Neelix beamed a smile at her from where he stood across the counter. She gave him a pointed stare, the tiredness shining through her eyes taking most of the edge off. "You look like you haven't slept in days."

"Thank you, Neelix; you really know how to flatter a girl." He gave her a small smile.

"How about I whip you up some pancakes? I got a recipe from Ensign Green, and I've been waiting for a reason to try it for days." It was all the Captain could do to keep herself from shuddering.

"Thank you, Neelix, but I think I'll just stick with coffee right now. Maybe tomorrow."

"Are you sure?"

"I am. Thank you." She turned her eyes back to her cup hoping for a little time to let the brew kick in and up the dangerously low levels of caffeine in her system. It took her a couple of minutes to realize that her hopes wouldn't be fulfilled anytime soon. The Captain sighed deeply before placing her empty mug back on the counter and leaving the mess hall to head to the bridge for the beginning of her duty shift. The hallways leading to the bridge were relatively empty for this time of morning, for that Captain Janeway was happy: the less she had to interact with people today, the better. Hopefully there wouldn't be any requests for crew rotations so she could shut herself in the ready room for most of the shift. Unless they encounter an extremely hostile race. _That would be just my luck..._

"Captain on the bridge!" said a couple of young ensigns, happy to be leaving their shift soon.

"Morning, everyone." She smiled through her mask. "Report."

"All seems to be fine, Captain." Chakotay, her second in command, stood up from his chair and took a few steps so that he could stand closer to the woman. "Engines and Shields are at optimum efficiency, and scanners indicate a small class M plant not too far, though we still can't be sure in regards to the population."

"Can't be sure?" she inquired, slipping into her chair and crossing her arms in front of her as she leaned slightly back and crossed her legs at the knees.

"Yes. The planet seems... empty. There are no masses of civilization, no outgoing transmissions; it's as though the planet has not yet reached the evolutionary levels that earth had reached in 1000AD."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, Captain." The voice answering her inquiry wasn't that of Chakotay, but higher and feminine. If it wasn't for the low levels of energy currently occupied solely by the tasks of keeping her body upright in a sitting position and her eyelids from drooping, she was sure she would have jumped to her feet, startled by the voice coming from her immediate right. Looking up to meet the blue eyes of her Astrometrics Officer, she made a small gesture for the former Borg drone to continue. "I have run scans of the planet's surface on both the short and long range scanners and so far I am unable to locate any masses of population, large or small."

As she looked at the woman, she couldn't help but see the transformation that had occurred since they had severed the statuesque blue-eyed blonde from the Borg collective just a few years ago. In that time, she had seen the younger woman flourish from the Borg drone who wanted noting but to return to the comfort of the collective, the only kind of family she knew, even going so far as to try and take over the ship and hurt its Captain in attempt to free herself. But as the Borg collective was all Seven knew at the time, the attempt wasn't taken all that seriously by the older woman, especially since it failed so miserably.

"There are no signals emitted from the planet, no satellites, nothing?" Chakotay shook his head.

"None, Captain, not even radio signals." She frowned.

"All right. Maintain course and keep scanning. If there is intelligent life down there, I don't want to interfere with them, even if they are in biblical times. The last thing we need is to start a new religion."

"Why not?" her first officer shot her an amused smirk. "Didn't you ever want to play god?" The only response he got was an exasperated look from the sitting woman and a raised eyebrow from the other.

"I was unaware that one could 'play god'. How does one..." She stopped at a small wave of the Captain's hand as the older woman rose to her feet.

"It's a figure of speech, Seven. It means someone who controls and manipulates people's fates on a whim." She could almost see the nanobots scurrying around in the younger woman's head as she filed the information for future use.

"The same way you do on this ship?" All activity in the bridge stopped as heads were turned in direction of the pair, wondering how their captain will answer. For her part, the auburn haired captain was trying not to let her jaw hit the floor in shock and hurt_. Why hurt? Is that... This is Seven asking for information. Don't read anymore then there is into this, Kathryn._

"I am the ship's Captain, I am responsible for what the vessel does as a whole and hence - to the productivity and welfare of its occupants. But I don't decide on matters based on my personal wills and desires alone. I do what is best for the ship and the people in it."

"I see." Kathryn sighed before turning back to Chakotay.

"You have the bridge, Commander; I'll be in my ready room." As she turned on her heel and started to leave, she added quietly, intending her words for the tall woman alone: "When said to someone, the phrase is usually an insult, Seven." The ready room doors closed behind her before she could get a response. Sitting down at her chair, she mentally counted back, expecting the door to chime. But when she had reached zero for the second time and was still left in silence, she smiled sadly and rose to her feet, getting a cup of coffee before sitting down again to work through the PADD's waiting her attention.

The next time she raised her head slightly to ask the computer for the time, it was nearly the end of her shift. And after having been alone in her ready room almost all day and never once hearing from Seven, she decided to head to Astrometrics. Maybe this way she could at least find out if the scans on the planet have revealed anything new. She took the long way to the lab, walking by a couple of hallways which held windows facing the planet and stopping to look at the sight.

They weren't as close as to allow her to see more then a small half-marble painted in blue and white, but the vision was breathtaking. It looked almost like Earth, and for the life of her she wasn't sure if that was a good or a bad thing. On the one hand - it was hope. But on the other hand, that resemblance only served as a reminder of the place they had lost. Of the people left behind, the families parted without knowledge of when and if they would ever return. It was an image representing her failure. She turned away from the windowed halls and headed deeper into the ship, closing her eyes for a moment before once again squaring her shoulders and moving in purpose-filled strides. Her crew could not see her like this. They could not see their captain when she's doubting, hurting, and weak.

It took less then five minutes to find herself in front of the doors that would lead her to Seven, and after running her fingers once through her hair, she moved to a spot where the doors would open for her and she could enter.

The tall woman turned to face her as the doors closed her face and eyes a blank. "Good... afternoon Captain," Seven said after calculating the appropriate phrasing of her greeting. _I thought I was getting better at reading her._

"Good afternoon, Seven," she replied as she stepped closer to the work console, leaning against it in what she hoped looked more like nonchalance then fatigue. "Is there anything new in regards to the planet?"

"No, Captain. I have run scans at one hour intervals since the planet was first sighted. At the speed that Voyager is traveling, scanning at shorter intervals would not be as efficient." Kathryn nodded.

"If we maintain course and speed, we should arrive within beaming distance to the planet in about three days. When we do, I plan to set up a few away teams that will go down to the planet and collect any materials that could replenish our supplies. Would you like to join one of the teams?"

"I believe I would."

"Good. In that case..." the Captain gently pushed herself away from the console and to a more upright stance only to have the room spin round her for a moment. She closed her eyes, willing the room to stop before attempting to reopen them, only to find the other woman standing closer to her, her eyes showing her concern.

"Are you... all right Captain?"

"I'm fine Seven." the shorter woman replied quickly, hoping to delay any other questions and suggestions. "I'm just tired. I think I'll call it a night early today." An eyebrow arched. "It means - go to bed."

"I see."

* * *

**I know this place... this meadow... Those mountains! I'm home! **_**The captain of the U.S.S. Voyager looked around, her joy swelling in her chest as she started up the near by hill, knowing that behind it she will finally be able to see the place she had missed all these long years: her mother's farmhouse. Her smile and stride grew with each step she took until she was running, **_**'captain decorum' be damned.**

_**She reached the top of the hill with her eyes closed tightly, wanting to experience the full force of the vision awaiting her. The gentle breeze pushed her hair back behind her shoulders as she stopped to catch her breath. She realized then that that soft wind in the trees was all she heard: there were no voices, no birds, no machinery, nothing. It was just her breath and the wind.**_

_**Twin blue eyes shot open and the woman fell to her knees in the grass as the view struck her like a physical blow. There was no farmhouse, no barn, and no trees. Nothing but grassland. Above her, a second yellow sun joined the first in the sky as if taunting her. Laughing at the notion that caught her in its grip, all she could do was scream out her pain. She didn't, she couldn't, stop the tears as she sobbed for the home she lost, the family she missed, a whole planet left behind. Lowering her shoulders, she bent almost painfully low, burying her face in her hands and her shoulder in the tall grass as she wept.**_

_**She only rose slightly when she felt a presence behind her. Strong, yet comforting and soft. She wouldn't turn around. She can't let this person see her like this. Not when she could at least maintain some of her dignity. But the presence showed no need for that and just stood behind her, allowing her to absorb the sense of peace and comfort it emitted.**_

_**After a few moments, she could feel it moving, and a soft weight was placed against her shoulders and back, the feeling of company and comfort now radiating from there. Raising her head and daring to look, she was that the **_**stranger?**_** had placed a soft, woolen fabric on her shoulders and let it hang from her back. The color was a mixture of white and light browns and by the shape of the garment she wasn't sure if it was a blanket or a cloak. But it didn't matter, she was no longer alone.**_

* * *

Captain Kathryn Janeway sat at her ready room desk, a cup of hot coffee at hand as she ran the events of last night's dream through her mind for a second time that morning. These dreams had started two days ago and were now a reoccurring fixture in her sleepless nights. It was the same every night for nearly a week now - she would go to bed, sleep for less then two hours and wake up with a new dream fresh in her mind. In her dreams, she was as alone as she felt in her waking hours, but then that presence would come and she would be safe and warm. They never spoke in her dreams, nor did she ever see the figure which stood so close to her. But the presence alone was enough to calm her.

After the first night, she woke up feeling rested. But the feeling fled her body as soon as she sat up. It has been so for three nights now, and by the end of today - they would reach the planet, and maybe a night on the surface with an away team would be the cure for her insomnia.

The chime to her door sounded, startling her out of her reverie and she straightened as she called the person on the outside of her door to enter. The doors swished open and she smiled to see Chakotay motioning for Seven to enter before him, and immediately had to suppress a frown as she watched him look at the woman walk.

"Report."

"We have reached orbit, Captain, and are ready to begin site to site transport of the away teams," stated her second. She nodded.

"Do you have anything to add, Seven?"

"No, Captain. However I wish to inquire as to the possibility of..." she paused, "exploring the planet's surface with one of the away teams leaving today." Janeway sighed as she placed her mug down on the table, then stood up and headed to the windows, looking out at the azure orb dotted with white. When they were in viewing distance of the planet, people rushed to available windows, hoping to see a semblance to the planet they left behind. She was glad that they didn't. The geography of the orb made that distinction very prominent, very soon, as the two masses of land that covered about a sixth of the surface looked too different and shape and color than they ere supposed to. The red soil served as a reminder that they were still strangers here, that they still had a way to go. _Not that I could ever forget._

"I would rather you didn't go this early in the exploration Seven. There are still matters that need your attention on deck. But you will be on surface tomorrow."

"Captain..."

"No, Seven." Her voice was cold and firm, much more than she thought it would be, and the Captain tried not to wince at its harshness as she cut the woman off. "You are needed here. You will leave tomorrow. Dismissed, both of you."

"Yes, Captain."

"Understood." Unlike Seven, who turned on her heel and left, Chakotay took a moment to look at her before he left, and for the life of her she didn't know which had hurt more, or why she was so hard on the young woman. _There was no reason. I will go after her and apologize._

Raising herself from the couch, the woman was able to take two steps before collapsing on the floor.

After the second time he chimed and got no permission to enter, Tom Paris decided he would wait no longer and enter anyway, knowing that there was no way that the Captain hadn't heard the chime. He wasn't completely through the door when he dropped the PADD he was carrying and ran to his captain, turning her over so that he had easier access to her pulse point. "Computer, site to site transport, two to beam directly to sickbay."

"Please state the nature of the medical emergency." The doctor appeared stating the old customary greeting before grinning to himself and looking about to see Tom in the same position he had taken in the ready room: kneeling with the captain in his arms. "Oh my goodness! Quickly Tom, get her on the biobed."

Word was quickly out to Chakotay, and from him to all the senior staff regarding the captain's incapacitation, and it was not long before Tom, B'Elanna, Tuvok, Harry Kim and Seven joined him in an out of the way conference room.

"Tom, since you were with the Doctor, you give the update." Five sets of eyes turned to the man and he leaned forward in his seat, entwining his fingers as he placed his elbows on the table top.

"Captain Janeway is in sickbay. I found her lying on the floor of her ready room and took her the Doctor almost an hour ago. He says this is exhaustion, so we have nothing to fear, but he injected her with enough drugs go get a horse to sleep for a week." Chakotay took lead of the conversation from there.

"This means I will be taking command of Voyager, which will leave me unable to lead the Alpha team. I know that all of you have a lot of work that needs to be done, but I would greatly appreciate it if one of you took my place. I would rather a senior officer lead them." He turned to the blonde woman staring at the tabletop, "Seven, how about you?" Blue eyes slowly rose to meet his own.

"I don't that's wise, Chakotay," a second female voice interjected. "No offense, Seven, but the Alpha team needs to be led by someone who knows how to command, and Seven is more of a loner than a leader."

"Well, there isn't an abundance of commanders on this ship."

"No, but there are department heads."

"I concur. While we can not question the capability of Seven, we can not let the de-facto leader of all the teams be an inexperienced one." B'Elanna nodded.

"I say let Tuvok do it. He has the experience, and the people will take him replacing you better than..." She cringed slightly. "I'm sorry, Seven, I didn't mean for it to sound like that. What I meant was..."

"Lieutenant Torres," the cool voice cut her off. "I have comprehended your meaning and do not find it hurtful. You may continue."

"That was my whole point actually. What do you think Tuvok?"

"That would be the most logical course of action," he agreed.

"All right, in that case: Tuvok, come with me and we'll let the other team leaders know of the change. The reason for it does not, however, leave this room. Dismissed." Seven only noticed her surroundings again when she stepped through the doors to sickbay. She hadn't noticed walking this way, or telling the turbo lift to take her where she needed to go, but she was here nonetheless and the Doctor was headed her way.

"Good morning Seven!" he beamed at her. "What can I do for you this morning?"

"I am here to see the Captain."

"The Captain?" he looked perplexed. "She isn't here Seven." Her brow furrowed in confusion.

"The Commander had stated that..."

"Shh!" He took her by the arm to his office and stood facing the doorway. "The Commander and I have agreed to keep the matter of the Captain's... condition on a need to know basis so that it doesn't affect moral. People on ships tend to be a superstitious lot at times." He chuckled softly. Seven's pointed stare made sure he soon picked up this line of thought. "Anyway, since there was no danger, and what the Captain needed most is rest, then I have moved her to her quarters." When the woman looked as though she was ready to protest, he raised his hand indicating that he was not yet finished. "I was, however, hoping that I could be allowed to share this "secret" with another individual that will be willing to look after her: watch her to see that her condition is not deteriorating, that my diagnostic was indeed correct. Not that I doubt that in the least, but it never hurts to make sure."

"I will do it."

"Seven, you don't have to do this. I'm sure I can find some crew member that will be..."

"Your protests are futile. You have stated that the Captain's condition will be divulged only to those who need to know it. I already know and it will hence be more efficient to let me look after her instead of informing another crewmember and hoping that this person will not speak of the matter, even after we break orbit and continue our journey home."

After a short moment to think over her words, the Doctor agreed and handed her a tricorder. "I would suggest you take several PADDs with you. It will probably be hours before she wakes."


	2. Chapter 2

(See disclaimers and the like in chapter 1)

* * *

_**She was standing in her quarters, a cup of hot coffee held tightly in her hands. In the background, soft jazz music was playing, and in front of her was the vastness of space. Black silk and diamonds. Tightening the robe, she looked out into the cold view and could barely suppress a shudder.**_

_**The hairs on the back of her head told her when she wasn't alone anymore, and she smiled. "I've been expecting you." Her visitor was quiet. "I've been starting to wonder if I'll ever get a chance to hear your voice." She admitted to the figure standing next to her as she continued to look out at the stars.**_

_**"All you needed to do was ask." It replied in a familiar voice.**_

_**"Then I guess I'm asking." She could feel the being smile. "Why are you here?"**_

_**"Would you rather I left?"**_

_**"No, I... didn't say that. But I was wondering..." she let the sentence die, not sure how she wanted to end it.**_

_**"I am here because you need me." Kathryn took another sip of her coffee.**_

_**"You gave me a blanket once."**_

_**"Affirmative." She laughed, still not turning to face the being at her side.**_

_**"I never understood why people prefer that word to a simple 'yes'."**_

_**"Perhaps it is conviction that makes one take the longer route."**_

_**"I beg your pardon?"**_

_**"Why settle for something short when you can have something everlasting?"**_

_**"Was that supposed to be and explanation?" the being smiled again.**_

_**"Yes. And you will ask the question that leads to it in time." Kathryn blinked at the stars in confusion.**_

_**"What do you mean?"**_

"Captain?" The voice was near her, and if she could just open her eyes... "Captain," she heard the soft voice again. It was as though it was trying not to wake her while inquiring if she was still, in fact asleep. "Are you awake?" It took but a moment for realization to dawn on her as to the person's identity.

"I'm awake, Seven." Opening her eyes slowly to take in the dimly lit room she was, for a moment, disoriented until objects came to better focus and she recognized her quarters. "What am I doing here?"

"You had... collapsed, Captain. The Doctor says you suffer from severe exhaustion, and that you must rest." Tentatively, she raised a hand to her forehead, winching at the headache setting in.

"How long have I been out?"

"Out?"

"Unconscious, asleep."

"23.39 hours." Closing her eyes, Kathryn huffed. "Do you require anything, Captain?"

"A glass of water please."

"I will comply." The Captain leaned deeper into her pillows to stretch away the remains of sleep before sitting up, feeling better than she had in days. And this time the feeling wasn't fleeting, she couldn't help but smile.

"Don't tell me the senior staff has been taking turns watching over me," she half-stated, half-asked the woman returning with the requested beverage.

"No, they were not," came the reply as the former drone handed her the glass.

"Then what were you...?"

"The Doctor has asked me to monitor your condition and report any change to him."

"And you were here all along?" The blonde woman nodded and Kathryn couldn't help but press on. "So why not just keep me in sickbay?"

"The Commander and the Doctor have decided that seeing you in sickbay might result in inefficiency among the crew." The older woman mouthed 'oh' and sipped her water, at a loss for words to phrase the question running through her mind. "I should inform the Doctor that you are awake." Nodding her accent, she watched as Seven contacted the Doctor who promised to be there shortly.

True to his words, he was stepping through her bedroom door in minutes. Seven stepped over to the other side of the bed to allow him to work. A short examination revealed that she was now a bit dehydrated, but all right. "I want you to rest Captain, and drink a lot."

"What if I go planet side, Doctor? I promise not to any heavy lifting and I know the fresh air will do me good."

"Why do always I feel a need to worry whenever you promise me something concerning your health?" She shrugged, her face purely innocent. The man sighed and shook his head. "You are making life hard for this hologram... I would agree on one condition - that someone goes with you on shore leave to make sure you follow my instructions." The Captain laughed as she threw her legs over the side of the bed and got to her feet.

"Fine Doctor, I will join one of the teams, and..."

"No, no," he cut her short with a raised hand. "You and another person will be going to the shore leave site. I have no problem with you spending the night on site, but you are not joining a team. I know you Captain - if you do, you're going to want to show them that you can pull your own weight, literally. And I can not allow that. I'm allowing you to take a crewman, not a team."

"You're serious about this, aren't you?"

"Of course. You collapsed due to severe exhaustion, I have half a mind to look though my matrix and find an hour long reprimand about not coming to me sooner." Her shoulders slumped.

"You're right." He brightened, a smug smile settling on his face.

"Of course I am." Sitting back on her bed, the Captain frowned up at him.

"Do you have anyone in particular in mind or should I ask for someone over the ships comm system?"

"That will be unnecessary." The two turned their attention to the woman standing at the other side of the bed, her posture ramrod straight, her hands clasped behind her back. "I shall endeavor to the surface of the planet with you." The look of confusion melted from Captain Janeway's face, replaced with a soft smile.

"You have given me much of your time already, Seven. I can't ask you to do this, not when you can be more productive if you go down with the team you are supposed to go with."

"I am not scheduled for an excursion." The confused look returned to the older woman's face. "I asked Commander Chakotay to remove me from that mission so that I could be..." the woman paused as she tried to find the correct word "here."

"Seven..."

"I will leave you to get ready, Captain. I am sure you are anxious to depart." The older woman blinked in confusion as the blonde apparently dismissed herself and left. A few moments later the Doctor cleared his throat and she turned back to face him.

"I'm sorry, Doctor," she apologized as she got to her feet "she just... confuses me so much sometimes."

"You are her friend, Captain, she cares for you." She waved a hand in dismissal of his statement.

"I'm aware of that. That wasn't my point: it feels like every time I've adjusted to a change, another one pops up. I enjoy her development immensely, but sometimes it just happens so fast..."

"You sound like a parent, Captain." He looked at her with a gentle smile. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll return to sickbay." Nodding her head, she dismissed him.

Less then an hour later, the two women were in the transporter room heading to where the crew decided to erect a campsite for all who didn't want to stay alone in the wilderness. The encampment was made up of several circles of tents in various sizes around the remains of a bonfire circled with rocks.

"Captain!" A surprised Lieutenant Russom jumped to her feet as the two materialized a few feet away from her. "I mean," she blushed, "Hi Captain, Seven." Captain Janeway smiled at the woman and inclined her head.

"Alex. Nice place you set up here." The woman's blush deepened.

"Thank you Captain, but I wasn't here during the set-up. I was with the second beta team at the time."

"I see." She looked around. "Who took charge of the sleeping arrangements?"

"Skon" The Captain's smile almost turned to a smirk.

"Of course he did. I'll go find him then." The young lieutenant pointed the way where the Vulcan was last seen and the Captain walked off to find him, leaving the two younger women alone.

It was less then an hour later that they had claimed a three person's tent in the third circle. It was the one furthest from the fire pit, and seeing as most of the tents around were still unoccupied - the Captain knew that the privacy she'd crave at the end of the day could easily be found there. She took the rest of the day to relax and get to know the immediate area around the site with Seven never straying from her side and Lieutenant Russom playing the role of their tour guide. She occasionally tried to prompt Seven into smiling or playing a game with the other crew members, with little luck. Kathryn was glad she didn't try the same tactic with her as she had no idea how to explain Seven forbidding her to do anything strenuous, as she knew the blonde would if she would show interest in any of the games that involved running, jumping, or any other form of activity that would cause her to sweat. So she kept her expression schooled and opted for a short hike to get to know their surroundings, sending Seven a force three glare when the third woman in their party wasn't paying attention. The glare hit its mark and Seven was mostly silent during their walk.

"Alex." It was getting dark and the trio were retuning to the campsite when something dawned on the older woman "What **do** you do here at night?" The lieutenant laughed.

"Most people don't like to stay the night and prefer to return to their quarters, but those of us who stay find ways to entertain ourselves." At the Captain's raised eyebrow, the raven haired woman threw her hands level with her shoulders her eyes wide "I didn't mean **that**!" The surprise on her face turned to contemplation as she added "I wouldn't be surprised though... But to answer your question - some of us looked up the old Terran and Bajoran ways of having a bonfire, and we adapted them both. So we're cooking potatoes in it, and barbecuing some meat that we managed to get from Neelix, though he was appalled that we wanted it raw until we explained. After dinner, there will probably be singing if Tom Paris found the music to some of the songs found in the databases, or we'll improvise. Then head to sleep," she shrugged. "Do you sing Captain?" She asked with a gleam in her eye. Seven raised her eyebrow at the woman's tone of voice. The Captain chose a short laugh as an answer and shook her head.

"I don't sing." She couldn't help but laugh again at the younger woman's proposition of twisting her arm once the gathering started to pick up. Not long after that, they were back at the camp and parted ways so that the lieutenant could help set up dinner. The other two women made their way to their shred tent.

"You were very quiet today, Seven."

"I was enjoying the view."

"It is beautiful here, isn't it? But you are still a terrible liar, dear." The woman looked at her captain in surprise.

"I am Borg, I do not..." she was stopped with when the woman beside her shook her head sadly.

"Seven, you don't need to tell me anything, and if you don't want to talk about something just say so. But please don't insult my intelligence."

"I... I'm sorry, Captain."

"It's alright, Seven, just don't do it again." She motioned at the tent. "I'm going in to get my knife. Do you need something from inside?" After replying she didn't, the older woman went inside. Pulling out the two sleeping bags they replicated before leaving, as well as her fathers old hunting knife, she quickly set up the sleeping bags, placed the knife in her pocket and left. "I set up the sleeping bags," she explained when stepping out.

Dinner was a loud affair, making Captain Janeway and Seven both step back slightly and observe more them participate, each due to reasons of her own. As the boisterous affair of dividing the food began to die down, the two found a seat on a log across from most and ate quietly. Seven, trying to understand the purpose of the behavior of the people around her but knowing what she did about what was considered polite, chose to file some of her questions away for a more appropriate time. Kathryn, on the other hand, was enjoying herself and trying not to show it too much. And they said they found a coffee plant not far away. Thank heaven for technology, she could enjoy it today.

When the 15 crewmembers that remained on site had had their fill, the plates were taken away and they settled back down with either cups of coffee or hot cocoa. Taking a long sip of her brew, she nudged Seven, "Try it. It tastes much different than coffee, I think you'll like it." She watched as the woman tasted the beverage carefully and smiled as ice blue eyes, turned almost purple in the firelight, widened as the taste registered. They fluttered close as the woman indulged herself by taking another long sip. "Just don't moan, Seven, people might take it the wrong way." With that, Kathryn sat beside her, burying her smirk in her mug as conversation started around them turning Captain Janeway's focus to the others.

"Alex!" an ensign called from the other end of the fire pit as the raven haired lieutenant managed to bring herself to sit with the Captain and the Borg, pulling her attention from the auburn haired woman who was explaining the purpose of marshmallows to the former drone. "You said you wanted us to sing around the fire. Why don't **you** start?" His tone was one of playful challenge, and the woman raised her head slightly as she thought for a moment.

"Alright. When I was little, my parents took me camping once." Conversation stopped as the woman told her story. "My mother taught me this old Terran song then. I know most of you know it, and if you don't join in I'll stop after the first verse." She threatened, her smile taking away the potency of her words. When she opened her mouth again, a clear and strong soprano started the words to 'Where Are All Those Girls'.

A quiet gasp from the woman beside her caused Seven to turn her head in direction of her captain and saw her openly staring at the Lieutenant, her mouth slightly open in amazement. It wasn't long before nearly all the people sitting joined the in song, but true to her word - the older woman stayed silent throughout the evening, reverting attention away from her when someone asked her to sing with grace and ease in a way that most didn't even notice what she was doing.

The happiness around her was infectious, but Kathryn couldn't help but pull herself slightly back. One of the guidelines she was taught when learning command was not to fraternize with her crew. In her wish to be on solid ground, with fresh air and trees around her she had forgotten that staying the night meant she would have to do just that, especially with the atmosphere around the fire. Taking a moment to thank heaven for keeping the people in the campsite from drinking alcohol, she turned her attention once again to the woman at her side as she called up another song from memory, leading the crowd until they were comfortable enough in each others company to suggest songs themselves.

But it was that voice, the beautiful clear soprano that struck a cord in her heart and wound itself around her mind and sent it reeling. It was almost as though the woman had operatic training, and if she did then Neelix's upcoming talent night was going to be all the more interesting if the woman entered it. As a thought took shape in her head, she couldn't help but smirk. _I will just have to find out if it's doable._ Her thoughts let her from their grasp well after a plan formed in her head, and Captain Janeway noticed that she hadn't noticed when the song they were singing now had started, or what were the previous few songs. Deciding this was as good a time as any, she rose to her feet, bid her people goodnight and headed to the tent for the night.

_**She was standing on a hill, gentle wind blowing around her, making the grass bow down in waves that rolled into the distance towards the setting sun. Feeling calmer than she had expected, she turned too look at her surroundings, the evergreens, grass and sky soothing away any remains of the burden she always seemed to carry these days. At the edge of the forest, partially hidden in the shade, stood a lone figure, her long hair and the hem of her dress, '**_**or is it a skirt,'**_** swaying gently in the wind. Smiling gently to herself, Kathryn made her way to the woman who kept herself shaded enough so that she couldn't see the woman's face. Standing in front of her, Kathryn smiled. "It's been a while."**_

_**"It has." The woman agreed and turned, gesturing for Kathryn to follow. Smiling gently, she did, and the woman she trusted so took her through well lit paths, while keeping to the shadows, her face never in view.**_

_**"Wait..." the other woman stopped, and Kathryn did her best to try and see her face. It was a blur "I..." huffing in her frustration she tried again "Why can't I see you?" The woman seemed saddened**_

_**"I suppose it is because you are not ready."**_

_**"But..." The sentence died on her lips.**_

_**"Tell me what it is you desire Kathryn." the name coming from the woman's mouth felt like a caress against her skin. She closed her eyes, savoring the feeling of it before remembering that the woman had made a request. Opening her eyes to answer, she was surprised to see that the other woman was no longer in front of her. "Kathryn..." The name was whispered from behind her by the familiar velvet-soft voice. "You enjoy it when I say your name..."The woman's tone was nearly one of wonder. Closing her eyes again, she could only nod her assent. She felt the comforting presence come closer, stepping so close that the front of her body molded into Kathryn's back. She could hear the wind in the trees as it passed through branches. In the distance there were birds, but as the contact between their bodies increased she could sense those sounds less and less, her body focusing on the one behind it. The soft swell of breasts pressed against her upper back made her shiver and the woman encircled her with her hands. "Better?" Warm breath blew by her ear and she sank back into the embrace not trusting her voice. Feeling warm, protected, and loved, she let her head rest against a nearby shoulder and inhaled the woman's sent as she breathed. It was familiar, and right at the edge of her consciousness, but for some reason it kept evading her.**_

_**It was seconds or hours later that the woman behind her moved slightly, making the smaller woman open her eyes at the sudden loss. "You are tired Kathryn, you must rest." Picking her up ever so gently, she took the few steps from where they stood to Kathryn's bed and gently placed her cargo in it, covering the woman with her blanket.**_

_**"Stay with me?"**_

_**Ice blue eyes locked onto hers with a tender smile. "As you wish."**_

Waking up seconds, or hours, later she turned in her bed, almost surprised to find it empty. Sighing sadly she got out of bed and got ready for her shift.

When the alpha shift began, the Captain was already sitting in her chair, her second sitting to her right as she gave the command to break orbit two days after having woken up on the surface of the planet. Talent night was scheduled for three days from now and she hoped that conflicting schedules wouldn't cause her plan to backfire.

"Is everything all right, Captain?" Chakotay turned to her and asked in low tones, knowing how she preferred to keep some distance from the rest of her crew.

"I am Chakotay. Why do you ask?"

"You just seem a bit distracted in the past couple of days." She smiled to him and patted his hand.

"I'm fine Chakotay. I just have some things on my mind. I'll get answers to them today though."

"Okay..." He fumbled for a moment before taking a deep breath and adding, "Captain, will you be going to the talent night?" She quirked an eyebrow at the man

"I might make an appearance. Why do you ask?"

"Well," he shifted slightly under her gaze and turned a glance at Seven who was busy at her console before looking back, "B'Elanna, Tom, Seven, and I will be going together and we thought that maybe you might want to come with us?" Over at her console Seven's fingers stopped moving momentarily as her eyes locked on the two commanding officers of Voyager speaking in quiet tones. Knowing it was improbable that anyone other then herself heard the two, she resumed her work, not sure whether she wished the woman would accept or decline.

"I can't give you a definite answer just yet, Chakotay." Captain Janeway replied with a small smile that she knew would drive her second mad as he would undoubtedly try to figure out why.

"A date, Captain?" he asked, trying to keep the surprise out of his voice. Her response was a hearty laugh as she got to her feet.

"Not hardly. Just something I want to look into." Nodding her head at him, the command mask once again fully in place, she turned the bridge over to his command. "I'll be in my ready room." Just as the woman turned to the doors to her ready room, the doors leading to the bridge swished open and Lieutenant Russom walked in, stopping abruptly when seeing the captain. "You're early," the auburn haired captain said casually and motioned to her ready room leading the way in.

"Anyone know what that's all about?" Tom asked from his station. "I don't think I've **ever** seen Russom here."

"Indeed," came the reply from Tuvok, and Seven fought hard against the urge to stop working or enhance her hearing to the best of her capabilities in hopes of hearing the conversation. Deeming the act inefficient as the room was soundproof, she returned to her tasks. The raven haired lieutenant stepped out twenty minutes later, trying to hide the added spring in her step. Two members aboard the bridge noticed, and said nothing.

Inside the ready room, an elated Kathryn took a long hard look at the stack of PADDs awaiting her in order to summon back the Starfleet Captain that had left the room along with the other woman, leaving her alone to celebrate. _Celebrate what exactly? What do I hope to achieve in this?_ Not sure she knew or wanted an answer yet, she rolled her shoulders and set to work. There were still quite a few hours before she could send the rest of her plan to motion and she just hoped that the younger woman was game. _Time will tell Katie, only time will tell._

When the end of duty shift came and the Captain left almost immediately heads turned. It was easy to tell she was hiding something, that she knew, but there was a big difference between knowing she was hiding something and knowing what it was, and Kathryn hoped she could keep the second part of that equation unknown for as long as she possibly could. The question was how. They were confined to the ship and she and the lieutenant would have to meet and rehearse if they were going to sing together. _Hopefully she'll agree to my suggestion. This way we can log in the characters names instead of ours. I would really rather people wouldn't know I sing, this could end up all over the ship!_ Entering the holodeck, she nodded at the woman already waiting for her. Starting the program, she showed the other woman her plan and was happy to see the woman accept. Ordering the computer to send a copy of the sheet music to the song to both their personal PADDs, she moved the program forward to give the other woman more insight into the workings of this old story.

When it ended the younger woman was near tears. "That was beautiful..." she smiled up at her captain who was still looking at the tombstone. "But the ending was... creepy." The other woman turned to face her.

"I thought the same the first time I saw it."

"And now?"

"I'm not sure. In a way, it's sweet that he had kept loving her all this time. But then again, I'm not sure if this was love or an obsession. But our time here is almost up, we should head out, we can continue this conversation later."

"Another minute, Captain? I was thinking about clothes, and I think I found something that would be... uh..." she tried her best not to blush "fitting." Her response was a raised eyebrow, but instead of explaining the younger woman asked the computer to show them two characters from the vid. "I was thinking about this for me, without the cape, though. And this one for you. But maybe in different colors..." she mused. "Forest green and mustard might work in this setting and with the blonde hair, but... it's ugly." The Captain nodded her assent with a smile.

"Any ideas?"

"Well, there's always the classic black with red trim, unless you're getting tired of the combination." she added with a small smile. "Blue or green trims can work out well, too, as long as the trim stands out. Alexis blue and white can work too, but maybe not with your hair..."

"Alexis blue? Not named after you I presume..." the Lieutenant had the grace to blush.

"After an old friend of my mother's, actually. She'd wear that color so often that the name just caught on in my family... Most know it as royal blue."

"I see." she pondered the thought. "I'll think about it and we'll work it out. Same time tomorrow?" Alex nodded and they shut down the program, each making her way to her own quarters.


	3. Chapter 3

"Thank you, B'Elanna, for assisting me in choosing appropriate attire for this evening."

"You're welcome Seven," answered the smaller woman as she looked up from the replicator. "Would you come closer, **I** don't need to choose your outfit, your input is important too." The broad smile took the edge off her words and Seven stepped closer to the smaller woman and looked as expert fingers displayed the different clothes that could be replicated. After Seven chose a white dress for herself and as she watched the replicator produced a navy blue dress of a very different cut, then the former drone's low in the front and even lower in the back attire, B'Elanna could hold herself no longer and aimed for indifference as she reached for the silky fabric. "So, is this your first date with Chakotay?" Seven's eyebrow rose at the question.

"Are you insinuating that the Commander is attempting to court me?"

"I'm not insinuating anything," was the defensive reply. "But you two are coming with Tom and me, I figured this was a double date."

"Double date?" The blonde tilted her head slightly as she ran the words through her head, trying to match a meaning to the term. "Explain." B'Elanna sighed

"A double date is when two couples go out together. It usually happens when each of the two couple are secure enough, or if one of them isn't and wants..."

"Backup?" Seven tried to supply when the other woman quieted for a moment. A snort escaped B'Elanna's lips.

"I've never heard it being referred as **that** before, but yes. It really depends on the couple and whether they need the," she smiled, "backup or just want an evening out with other friends. I take it this is your first date?"

"I have already engaged in a 'first date'."

"I meant with Chakotay. Leave your hair down Seven, you look more beautiful this way."

"I will comply." She paused. "I was unaware that this was a date with the Commander, so I am unsure as to the correct response to your question."

"Then forget about it. For all we know - this is just a night with friends."

"I think I would like that." Exchanging smiles, the two headed out of Cargo Bay Two and towards Holodeck one where Neelix was hosting the night. When they entered, they saw Tom and Chakotay already waiting for them and headed over to the table nearest to the stage where Tom stood to greet his wife and Chakotay followed his lead in greeting Seven.

"You look beautiful tonight, Seven."

"The outfit does look rather becoming on you Seven," greeted Neelix, seemingly emerging out of thin air and making the half-Klingon woman swear in her surprise. "I'm glad you all made it!"

"Thank you." He beamed a smile at the group and left to help others coming in to take their seats.

"What am I, chopped liver?"

"You're the most beautiful woman here, no offense, Seven." Tom reassured his wife who smiled at him as he pulled out a chair for her.

"Flatterer." He beamed her a smile, and they were all soon sitting and talking comfortably.

"Did the Captain actually tell you if she was going to come?" Tom asked when the stream of people entering seemed to lessen and Neelix started making his way to the stage to start the evening.

"She said she might make an appearance, but she was rather vague."

"That's not like her."

"I know. I just hope she is alright, she doesn't usually keep things from me." Tom shrugged.

"You're probably reading too much into this, tomorrow we'll find out that she just didn't want to tell you that she was curling up in bed with a book." That earned him a slap on the arm from his wife and a glare from Seven "What? I happen to know she likes to read!"

"Just watch it fly-boy, this is the Captain you're talking about."

"I concur." All conversation stopped as Neelix took the stage and welcomed the crew, saying a few words before welcoming the first performer of the night. A few performers later, Harry Kim left the stage with a replicated clarinet, to an enthusiastic ovation and Neelix took his place.

"Our next performer," he looked down to his PADD, "is actually two! Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome Christine Da'ae, and the Viscount Raoul de Chagny."

"Viscount?" B'Elanna echoed quietly as the table joined in the tentative clapping. Tom and Chakotay merely shrugged.

"I didn't know we had a 'Da'ae' on-board either," Chakotay whispered back.

Rising to the stage in small measured steps was a woman wearing a white dress. A few black ringlets were pulled back from her face while keeping the bulk of the curly strands free to cascade down her neck, shoulders and back. As the woman turned slightly to stand alone on center stage, the rest of the room openly stared at the beautiful woman wearing the full-length white dress. It was a simple cut, held up by wide straps that leaved the woman's arms bare. The dress clung to the woman's chest and part of her stomach before falling down in pleats. The design stunningly simple, and with it Lieutenant Alexandra Russom took people's breath away before she even opened her mouth.

"Why did Neelix introduce this woman as Christine Da'ae? That is not her name." Seven voiced her question quietly to Chakotay who moved his chair closer to hers before responding that she and her partner would probably be acting. Blaring music stopped her next question, and the woman on stage responded to the sound by stepping back, fright written clearly across her face as she declared in a high-note: "The Phantom of the Opera!" The music swelled for several more notes before a second, lower voice was heard, this time from behind them. The room turned as one to see the newcomer who changed the music using tone of voice alone.

In the very back of the room, standing in a replica of an early 19th century soldier's dress uniform was the Captain. The black pants, pressed so tightly that the crease was clearly visible even in the darkened room, held a trim of red silk running up their side from just over black leather boots to the woman's waist. The shirt was also black, with a trim made of the same silk as the one on her pants, the design of ovals receding in size starting at the woman's shoulder blades and ending where the shirt did. Out of the top five ovals, three ended in a small fleur de lis. Completing the look were a couple of red epaulets, one covered by a cape colored a deeper hue then the rest of the red trimmings as it hung from her shoulder and covered her left arm.

Seven felt the air in her lungs leave her body in a rush.

Raising twin blue eyes to the stage, willing love and devotion show thought them, Kathryn took a deep breath, pushed her doubts away and sang as she came closer to the stage with each step

"No more talk of darkness,

Forget these wide-eyed fears

I'm here, nothing can harm you

My words will warm and calm you

Let me be your freedom,

Let daylight dry your tears.

I'm here with you, beside you,

To guard you and to guide you..."

As the woman stepped closer and closer to the stage, Seven discovered she couldn't look away. Ice blue eyes took in the woman, from the auburn hair bulled back in a French braid and tied with a ribbon, down to the costume that fit the woman like a glove, and all the way down to her boots.

"Say you love me every waking moment,

Turn my head with talk of summertime...

Say you need me with you now and always...

Promise me that all you say is true,

That's all I ask of you"

Kathryn stepped on the stage and reached out to the other woman, turning to face both her and the crowd as the Lieutenant took her hand. Looking at the green eyes before her, she was almost surprised to see the features change slightly - green eyes turned to blue and her hair seemed lighter, almost blonde. In her mind's eye, Kathryn finally began to see the woman from her dreams, her rock and anchor.

"Let me be your shelter

Let me be your light

You're safe, No one will find you

Your fears are far behind you..."

The love, the utter devotion reflected in Kathryn's voice, eyes, and stance caused a pain in her chest. Around her, she could see couples drawing closer together, heads resting against shoulders, or heads resting against heads, but all she felt was an acute sting she identified as loneliness.

"All I want is freedom,

A world with no more night

And you, always beside me,

To hold me and to hide me..."

As the raven haired woman sang, Chakotay moved even closer to her, putting an arm around her waist and motioning with a gentle touch that she can behave in the manner other couples in their vicinity did. But she stiffened at his touch. Despite feeling so small, so alone, she couldn't bare to let him touch her now. It was like being severed from the collective all over again, but the dominant emotion this time wasn't fear.

"Then say you'll share with me

One love, one lifetime

Let me lead you from your solitude.

Say you need me with you here, beside you,

Anywhere you go, let me go too –

Christine, that's all I ask of you..."

Glancing down from the stage and onto the barely lit audience she noticed a pair of eyes looking at her. They were the very same eyes she saw each night since she dreamt she was in the forest, the same eyes she was singing to. She saw the woman sitting ramrod straight and with those two signs, she finally knew. _I'm saying the wrong name..._

"Say you'll share with me one love, one lifetime...  
Say the word and I will follow you...  
Share each day with me,  
Each night, each morning...  
Say you love me..."

"You know I do..." _By heaven, I do..._ The women's voices crescendoed as they sang together.

"Love me - that's all I ask of you"

As the music took over, the two women came closer, but instead of the kiss the script demanded, Captain Janeway took the other woman in her arms and hugged her. The realization that the figure, the woman, who frequented her dreams almost daily for weeks now was sitting at a nearby table and watching her sing this song was almost too much to bear. Daring to look, she saw Chakotay's arm around the woman and her anger flared. There were two more lines in the song, and she knew she would sing them to the woman who held her heart.

"Anywhere you go let me go too

Love me - that's all I ask of you..."

Most of the audience rose to their feet giving the two women a standing ovation, and Captain Janeway was happy to note that the only ones who didn't rise to their feet were Neelix, who was standing just off stage during their whole performance, Alex and herself. _Mother would be proud._ She smiled gently as she bowed along with her partner in song, wanting nothing more but to get off the stage, the revelation being almost too much to handle when facing her crew.

"Captain, Alex, come join us!" They were barely off the stage when Tom Paris called to get their attention. In front of her, the raven haired Lieutenant turned to catch her eye, asking her permission with her eyes. She nodded, and they headed to the table where most of her senior staff was still standing. After a quick round of introductions, Tom pulled Chakotay with him to get a couple of extra chairs so that they could all sit comfortably, and the four women were left alone sitting closely together in the semicircle, the existing chairs were already in, facing the stage.

"You have been dishonest, Captain." Seven accused after a short moment of silence. Turning her head to look at the young blonde sitting beside her, Kathryn raised her eyebrow in question, and B'Elanna leaned forward to try and hear better.

"How so?"

"You said you can not sing." The raised eyebrow was replaced by a shy smile

"I never said I can't, Seven. I said I don't. At least I haven't, not for a very long time."

"Why not Captain?" B'Elanna interjected. "Your voice isn't bad."

"Thank you, B'Elanna, you're very good at masking complements." The half Klingon grinned. "But to answer your question - I don't know. Something just..." she looked behind her to see the men return, "felt right about singing that song." _Until you realized you're singing to the wrong woman?_ the small voice in her head supplied.

"We heard people talking, Captain," remarked Tom as he put the chair he was holding down next to his wife. "I think the holovid from tonight is going to be circulating about the ship for a while."

"I bet..." She grumbled good naturally, until she caught movement in the corner of her eye: Chakotay placing his chair by Seven, and leaning in close to whisper something to her. "I think I'll go get something to drink. Anyone want anything while I'm up?" Jade green eyes turned her way to ask for water, and she could almost feel the body next to her stiffen. _You figure out you're attracted to her and think automatically that she feels the same way? That she's jealous?_ The little voice almost laughed at her. _Ever hear of wishful thinking?_ "Seven?"

"I... thank you, Captain." Her eye brow inched up her head as she got to her feet.

"Is that a yes, a no, a hot, or a cold?" She asked with a smirk.

"A... cold, Captain," replied the slightly confused woman, and Kathryn smiled at her one more time before leaving for the counter where pitchers of drinks stood next to a portable replicator. _Pull yourself together Kathryn. Right now._ Making her way back to the table, she faltered slightly when seeing her first officer still with his hand around the back of Seven's chair. Pulling her command mask back on her face, she crossed the final few feet to the table and handed the women their drinks, noticing the almost violent shiver that ran down Seven's spine as she bent to place the drink in front of her.

"Are you cold, Seven?" Chakotay asked, concerned.

"I am..." was the response, the woman's voice unsure. The Captain and the Commander exchanged glances, and frowned.

"Put this around your shoulders, Seven," the auburn haired woman explained as she carefully took off her cape and handed it to the woman. "It should keep you a bit warmer." The blonde looked at her in confusion for a brief moment, but complied. Kathryn tried her best to contain her smile behind the rim of her glass. Ready to enjoy the rest of the show, she settled back against the back rest, crossed her legs, and looked up at the stage.

Lucky for her, just as the performer on stage ended his show, her comm badge chirped and Tuvok asked her to come to the bridge. It's one thing to have the people around you commenting on how badly the poor man did his act. But when you're the Captain you need to bite back some of your remarks about some people's hand-eye coordination. Sighing, she got to her feet and excused herself. Seven stood up instantly, ready to remove the red garment and return it to its owner. Biting her lip to keep from gasping at the vision of the woman dressed in white, her hair flowing freely and the added touch of romance produced by the cape, Captain Janeway declined. "You're cold, Seven, keep it. You can bring it back to me tomorrow. Just..." she felt foolish saying this, "please don't recycle it. I've had this silly thing for many years now and I would hate for faulty programming to get the better of it."

Nodding her assent, Seven watched the older woman walk out, as she caressed the fabric. If it was indeed as old as the Captain implied, then it was treated with great care, as it looked and felt as though it was completely new. The only statement as to the truthfulness of the shorter woman's words was the scent that clung to the fabric and wavered up and into her olfactory glands. The quantity and subtle variation of the lavender and a different scent something... _biological... unique..._ caused her to draw only one conclusion: this garment was indeed older then it appeared to be. Drawing the red fabric closer around her shoulders, she settled back to watch her rest of the show as her mind raced.

It was an hour later that the four senior staff members made their way out of the holoprogram, Lieutenant Russom making an excuse to leave not long after the Captain's departure. "What I don't understand is why she chose to sing that song with that woman." stated Chakotay for the second time that evening.

"She couldn't very well sing it with a male member of the crew," B'Elanna countered. "Her voice is too low for that." He rolled his eyes at her.

"I mean - if she wanted to sing, there are many other songs that she could have done. I mean, think about it - they were two women singing a song of their everlasting love and devotion." Tom shot him a questioning glance, "It's **wrong**."

"Chakotay..."

"I'm serious. She should have thought this through. True, it was a beautiful performance, but that doesn't make it any less wrong. After all, she **is** the Captain."

"So you're saying she can't...?"

"No! It's just not right." If someone were to ask Seven of Nine who was the one to ask the last question, she wouldn't be able to tell, not even after tapping the full power of her eidetic memory. _Two women singing a song of their everlasting love and devotion... It's wrong... She is the Captain... It's wrong..._ She was aware of reaching Cargo Bay Two, and bidding the Commander good night, but as the thoughts ran through her head in an everlasting loop, _two women... everlasting love... she is the Captain... it's wrong..._ the former Borg drone couldn't help but wonder what was the point of this humanity, if she could feel such pain, _it's wrong..._ and decided that if it remained after an eight hour regeneration cycle, then she would go see the Doctor. S_he is the Captain... everlasting love... _

Keying in the command that would start the cycle, she stepped into the alcove, not bothering to exchange the evening-wear for her bio suit. Her only thought - _this pain must stop._


	4. Chapter 4

In the month that followed her performance, Kathryn saw Seven pull further and further away from her, and her heart cried out in pain. Physically, the other woman was as present as she has ever been, as efficient and useful as ever, but the amount of time they spent together off duty has lessened immeasurably. They were spending less time playing velocity, even less time talking, and judging from the look on Chakotay's face whenever the statuesque blonde was around, be it on bridge duty or in senior staff meetings - their relationship was progressing, and nicely so.

Kathryn started to vanish that month, and Captain Janeway made herself more and more prominent. She was appearing less and less, only when alone with her books or in conversation with Master DaVinci leaving in her place only the mask, the rank to shield her from the woman who would take her hand, or hold her close, but only in her dreams. They were coming more frequently now and would usually appear more often then not. Always the same: comforting, warm, caring, even loving. and she would wake up feeling refreshed. But in her waking hour the tall blonde was far less accessible. She had tried talking to her for the first couple of weeks, while fending off the advances of Lieutenant Russom who seemed to take the meaning of the song they sang to heart in a way that made the Captain want to bang her head against the nearest hard surface.

After two weeks spent trying to talk with her head of Astrometrics she gave up, and left the woman to her silence. The Captain had been blossoming ever since, at the same time Kathryn felt herself wilt a little each day. This week there was a change though, as the lack of communication between her and the head of Astrometrics started to affect the work produced from the lab. Drawing her legs up on the couch where she was currently sitting, the Captain took stock of her options. She knew she was going to have to talk with the other woman, _but will it be as her captain or also as her friend? I want my friend back..._ She almost chuckled at the last thought, remembering a time when she had said the same words to her mother after a childhood friend had moved away, and her mother's reply that if she really wanted to keep that friendship, then she would have to try harder than usual, because distance was difficult on friendships. _Boy, was she right..._ "Computer, locate Seven of Nine." she said, getting to her feet and reaching for her uniform jacket

"Seven of Nine is in Cargo Bay Two." answered the feminine voice. Closing the jacket, she exited her quarters and headed for the Cargo Bay, knowing that the longer she put this off, the more difficult it was going to be.

Stepping off the turbolift, Captain Janeway took a deep breath and set her shoulders. Starting this conversation as the superior officer was easy since the reason she came here was professional, but after the past few weeks, it was also easier because there seemed to be so little of Kathryn left. If all goes well, she might be able to lower the command mask. As she entered the Bay, all traces of the emotions held by the woman named Kathryn left her, and the Captain took her place behind her officer, clearing her throat gently to get her attention. "I need to speak with you, Seven," she added before the woman completed the turn to face her.

"Yes, Captain?" The taller woman turned to face her, and she felt her heart almost skip a beat.

"I have been going over your Astrometrics reports, Seven." The blonde quirked an eyebrow.

"I am aware of that, Captain. Was there anything you wished to discuss?" Captain Janeway knew that anyone who would listen to this conversation wouldn't find it different from any other official conversation the former Borg drone would have with any of the other members of Voyager's staff. _But you don't want to be any other member of the staff do you?_ The little voice in her head questioned. _If she would only tell me what was wrong..._

"Yes. Ever since you have begun to work on Voyager, I have seen, and begun to expect, a certain level of performance." She placed her left hand knuckles on the fabric covering her hip, leaving her right hand free to gesture with her next statement. "Lately you are not up to those levels, Seven, to these standards that you have set for yourself." Letting go of the mask for a moment, she added, "I have never seen anything that could affect your concentration, like this or at all." Her hand slid from her hip as she took a step closer, placing a hand on the woman's upper arm. "I'm worried about you." Cold blue eyes looked at the point of contact before turning to meet her own and it was only with the return of her command mask that she could keep the chill from making her shudder. She removed her hand.

"I apologize, Captain. I was experiencing a slight... malfunction, but I have been alerted to its existence - I have begun making repairs. You will not see anymore flawed reports."

"You were malfunctioning?" The force of will that it took to keep her voice from trembling and her eyes from growing in fear rolled through her in a wave of almost physical energy. "What happened? Did you go see the Doctor or B'Elanna? Why wasn't I informed?"

"That was not necessary. I have located the malfunction with the aid of Commander Chakotay, and have since commenced the process of eliminating it. I shall return to optimum efficiency in time to hand you the next report." A decisive nod concluded the statement. _Chakotay?_

"Are you sure?"

"I am Borg." Captain Janeway sighed, knowing that this was the best answer she was going to get from the other woman, she felt her shoulders slump for the briefest of instances before she pulled herself back into her role of the Captain. After she was the Captain, she could try being the younger woman's friend again. _Even if she doesn't want your friendship?_ The small voice asked, but the usual 'I told you so' air was gone, replaced by a dull ache.

"You realize that if you want to talk, about **anything**, I'm here for you, right?" Blue eyes turned to hers again for the briefest of moments before turning away.

"There is nothing to discuss, Captain." Then the woman looked into her eyes again. The Captain could see no emotion in the younger woman's eyes, or hear it in her tone. "I value our friendship as well. But I have plans, Captain, and must prepare."

"I will leave you then. But please think about what I've said."

"Yes Captain." Knowing she was now too keyed up to return to her quarters, the Captain made her way to the bridge, only to have her jaw practically hit the floor less then 30 minutes later as she looked up into the eyes of her future self while the woman pulled rank on her.

It wasn't long after that she had decided that watching that woman was very unsettling. Not to mention the woman's first reaction upon seeing Seven: the pain and longing were painfully obvious on the woman's face and the Captain could barely restrain the urge to slap herself. Or her future self. _God, I hate temporal mechanics..._ Pinching the bridge of her nose, she looked out of her ready room windows and huffed. The Admiral was infuriating, giving orders as if this was **her** ship! The speech the Admiral had made in Astrometrics finally made the Captain snap. With a short command, almost a growl, she demanded they took a walk. _It's one thing to berate your self, but this is preposterous!_ Fuming as they walked down a deserted hallway in the brisk pace, the Captain finally let out that growl

"I wanna know why you didn't tell me about this."

"Because I remember how stubborn and self-righteous I used to be. I figured you might try to do something stupid," came the answer, smug enough to remind the younger woman of the first few months Seven spent with them.

"We have an opportunity to deal a crippling blow to the Borg. It could save millions of lives."

"I didn't spend the last 10 years looking for a way to get this crew home earlier so you can throw it away on some intergalactic good will mission!" Her years of dealing with assorted diplomatic missions asserted themselves full force when the Captain managed a much gentler version of what went through her head.

"Maybe we should go back to sickbay."

"Why, so you can have me sedated?" _There's a thought._

"No, so that I can have the Doctor reconfirm your identity. I refuse to believe I'll ever become as cynical as you!"

"Am I the only one experiencing Déjà vu here?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Seven years ago, you had the chance to use the Caretaker's Array to get voyager home. Instead, you destroyed it."

"I did what I knew was right."

"You chose to put the lives of strangers ahead of the lives of your crew. You can't make the same mistake again." _How __**dare**__ she!_

"You got Voyager home. This means I will, too. If it takes a few more years, then that's..." She didn't get to finish the sentence as the Admiral cut into her words.

"Seven of Nine is going to die." Captain Janeway paled, feeling the ground drop from beneath her feet at the Admiral's words.

"What?" She knew the woman was drawing her ace from her sleeve, but those seven words were too powerful. They nearly sent her crashing into the nearest wall.

"Three years from now. She'll be injured on an away mission. She'll make it back to Voyager, and die in the arms of her husband." The pain in her chest robbed her of breath, and she barely managed to choke out the word that was crammed into her throat.

"Husband?"

"Chakotay." _I've lost her..._ The Admiral's story didn't get better after this point, and the Captain finally understood why she had gone through the ordeal she had of late - if it wasn't for the distance, if she didn't lose nearly all of Kathryn Janeway, she would crumble to the ground as they spoke and break down. But as Kathryn was now such a small part of her, she could push the woman aside and let the Captain do what needed to be done.

They were home. They were finally home. Bidding her crew farewell was harder then she thought it would be, but when she set foot into the last hovercraft to leave the ship and slid into a comfortable chair, she couldn't help but sigh contently. They were six crew members sitting in the craft: the Doctor, B'Elanna, who was holding onto Miral, Tom, Seven and herself. An empty seat by the blonde woman looking at the throng of people had been reserved for Chakotay, but he appeared to have left the ship earlier without a word to any of them. If it wasn't for the fluttering at the pit of her stomach every time she looked at the woman, and out the window at the throng wondering if her family were amongst them, the auburn-haired woman knew that she would more then probably be **a lot** angrier than she was at the man.

Tom was busy speculating on where they would go once they landed until B'Elanna pointedly told him to be quiet, and the focus of the conversation turned to the Doctor and Seven. "I will be heading to headquarters. I'm sure they can spare me a room." He said with a slightly nervous smile. "How about you, Seven? Where will you be heading?"

"I was supposed to be staying with Commander Chakotay, but seeing as he has removed himself from the presence of any form of communication, then I shall have to resort to my original option and stay at Starfleet headquarters as well."

"You are welcome to stay with me, Seven." the Captain offered. "Even if my mother or sister sold my house and I end up checking into a hotel, I'm sure it would be far more comfortable to be there than at headquarters."

"Or you can stay with us," Tom jumped in, earning a surprised glance from his wife and an amused one from the Captain.

"I thank you for your offers, but I think..." She was cut off when the hovercraft's pilot announced that they will be docking in two minutes. Three people smiled broadly at that.

"You were saying, Seven?" the Captain prompted.

"I think I will request a room in headquarters as well." She turned to look at the older woman. "I do not wish to intrude on your time with your families."

"You won't be intruding Seven," the woman assured her, petting her knee before pulling back again. Tom and B'Elanna nodded their accent. "Think of it as an open invitation: if you change your mind, for whatever reason, just say the word and I'll come for you."

"I was unaware that there was a word one could use to make another come for them." Tom coughed out a chuckle and after a moment of thought, Kathryn could feel her ears redden.

Any further comments were stopped by the pilot's announcement that they had landed. "Seven," the Captain was once again present as she asked the other woman to stop, "walk out of here with me. I don't want any of the Admirals to get the idea that since you were once a Borg drone, they can now study or dissect you to gain knowledge."

"And you think that by walking the planet's surface with you that thought will not occur to them?"

"No, I do think that if you walk out of here with me they will see that as me putting you under my wing." After a moment's thought, the monotone reply she was expecting came to the other woman's lips and she couldn't help but smile.

"Acceptable."

"Good. Then let's go." Running a hand through her hair to pull a few stray strands back into place, Captain Kathryn Janeway squared her shoulders and stepped out into the sun, feeling more than seeing the beautiful woman moving to stand at her side. Taking a deep breath in hopes to quell the urge to take the other woman's hand in her own, knowing how ill advised that would be for so many reasons, she began her walk down the ramp.

When she reached the bottom of the ramp, she saw a young girl about three years old break from the crowd and run to them at top speed, her light brown hair catching the wind generated by her speed. She couldn't help but notice something so very familiar about that run. Bending down, she picked the girl up, the momentum causing them to slightly spin in place. "Hello," she smiled at the child. "Who might you be, running up here like that?"

"My name is Mowgan Wichad... Wichadson," she stated proudly, then turned a curious look at the Captain and the woman beside her. "Are you really my Aunt Katie?" Kathryn felt as though she was about to drop the child for a moment and risked a look at Seven who was regarding them with an unintelligible expression.

"That depends..." Looking at the little face before her, she could note similarities, but there's only one way to be sure. "What's your mother's name?"

"Phoebe." She could almost feel herself pale as she turned to scan the crowds before them. _I'm an aunt..._

"Then I guess I am." The girl beamed, and for the first time in weeks, Kathryn smiled back. "I want you to meet my friend Seven." The girl giggled. Finally seeing the people of her family, the older woman began to walk.

"That's a funny name. Why did your Mommy and Daddy name you after a number?"

"We'll explain that when we introduce Seven to everyone. In the meantime – Seven, this is my niece – Morgan." Seven nodded at the girl who took the introduction as a cue to regard the woman closely.

"She's dressed funny. Why is she wearing a leotard?" Laughing, she put the child down, explaining that the suit was made to protect Seven's skin, an explanation that received a raised eyebrow from the Borg woman, and mouthing 'I'll explain later'. When she turned away from the woman, the sight in front of her made her heart swell. There, coming out from the crowd were her mother, her sister and a man who could only be Morgan's father. She was aware of nothing until she felt her mother's arms around her neck and hugged her back fiercely, both women needing the physical closeness to know that this was real – she was finally home. They pulled back only when the older woman started to shake in her arms and Kathryn looked at the silent tears flowing down her mother's face freely.

"Sure took you long enough to get home, Sis." Her sister attempted casual banter as she too came in for a hug.

"It wasn't by choice Pheebs, trust me..." She replied into fiery red hair, several shades darker then her own. "You're married now?"

"Yes," her sister pulled back and smiled as she reached her hand for her husband. "Katie, this is Adam Richardson, Adam, my long lost sister: Kathryn." Fixing the man with a pointed look as she shook his hand, the Captain said one thing in greeting.

"I hope you're a good man, Adam."

"He is," her mother interjected with a smile before turning to face Seven. "And who might you be?" Kathryn blushed.

"I'm sorry; this is Seven of Nine, former Tertiary Adjunct of Unimatrix Zero-One." She wasn't sure what had caused her to use the full Borg designation, but for some reason, in this first meeting, she wanted to be precise in her introduction of the woman. She turned slightly to face the former Borg drone. "And these are my family: my mother Gretchen Janeway, my sister Phoebe, her husband Adam, who I plan on interrogating later. And Morgan," she smiled at the little girl, "who you've already met."

"Seven of Nine," her mother said contemplatingly, "that's... cumbersome." The blonde turned her head to look at her.

"The Captain has expressed her opinion in the same manner you have, and has shortened my full Borg designation - Seven of Nine, Tertiary Adjunct of Unimatrix Zero-One, to Seven. Although imprecise, I find it acceptable. You may call me by that designation if you wish."

"She speaks funny Mommy." Four adults burst into laughter and slowly, Seven broke into a smile, realizing the reason for the others laughter, leaving one confused child trying to ask her mother for answers.

"Let's go. The earlier we get into headquarters, the earlier we can get out." When they reached the stairs leading up to Starfleet headquarters building, Captain Janeway asked her family to stop as she walked up a few steps and turned to face the families and friends of the returning crew members, along with the press that mingled in. The Captain thanked them all for coming and added that once Starfleet finished their debriefings, she and her crew would be happy to share the stories of their travels. She spoke in a tone that made sure her crew knew this to be an order, while the rest of the assembled crowd who did not know her as well thought it to merely be a statement that a captain must make. Looking down at her family, she couldn't help but smile and hold out her arm for her mother as they turned to walk up the rest of the steps and enter headquarters.

Later that day, she was surprised to discover that her mother had kept her city apartment, leaving it practically unchanged save for a few new paintings, obviously her sister's work. Gretchen Janeway's response to the silent look of wonder was a dismissive one, claiming that since she knew Kathryn would be coming back, so there had been no other option but to keep it.

The next two weeks flew by in a rush of meetings and debriefings that had her out her door by 0700 hours and home not before 1800. But it was during the evenings spent with her mother that Captain Janeway began to recede and Kathryn began to reemerge. Her mother's choice to stay in the city rather than return to Indiana gave the two a chance to talk. They exchanged stories for days, Gretchen telling of life on the farm, improvements and adjustments, her personal life and the story of how Phoebe came to meet and marry Adam all in one short year. Her mother never asked about the travels themselves, knowing from the tone Kathryn used on the day of her arrival that she would not tell and might even close down if asked. So instead, she asked about the day to day life of the ship, shore leaves, anything that would let her daughter speak of the people she had been with for so long without breaking the secrecy.

"So we were sitting around a campfire, and this woman named Lieutenant Alexandra Rossum starts to sing, and my jaw dropped: she sounded just like..." she scratched her head trying to remember the elusive name "Sarah Brightman, from Phantom." She laughed as her mother's eyes sparkled with interest "And that of course made me think of you: the musical buff. I asked her to sing with me on a talent night that took place a few years later and she agreed to sing the part of Christine. I felt a bit closer to home then." The older Janeway smiled.

"What did you sing?"

"All I Ask of You." Kathryn's smile turned into a frown.

"That's when you realized it, wasn't it?" Gretchen asked softly, causing her daughter's eyebrows to rise in surprise. "You didn't think I was dumb, did you dear? When you talk of her your voice softens, your eyes light up and you smile brighter. Not to mention the amount of stories she was in."

"Mother..."

"Does she know?" Shaking her head Kathryn told of Seven's withdrawal from her company and of the woman's relationship with Chakotay. "You should still tell her that you care, dear."

"I have, mom."

"In those words?"

"No, but nearly in every other."

"You need to talk to her, you haven't seen each other for a couple of weeks. Maybe..."

"Mom, please." Kathryn cut her off and the older woman took a deep breath.

"You can't blame me, dear. I haven't seen you react like this to anyone since Justin." When the blue eyes looked at her, Gretchen could clearly see the surprise on her daughter's face and she smiled. "You clearly think I'm blind, Kathryn..." she said with a shake of her head. "I knew you loved Mark, but you weren't in love with him. I was watching you settle for a man who couldn't hurt you while hoping that you wouldn't."

"Why didn't you say anything?"

"Do you remember your reaction to Phoebe when she did?" Kathryn huffed. "I wanted you to have someone who you would feel free to come and talk to if you needed it, and after the fight you two had, I didn't think you'd come to her if only to avoid being told 'I told you so'." The older Janeway took a deep breath before continuing. "Call me a hopeless romantic, but I always hoped that you'd have love everlasting, not something just short."

"Why settle for something short when you can have something everlasting?" She mumbled remembering the dream where she had first heard Seven's voice.

"What was that?" Kathryn turned her eyes to the window just off her mother's right shoulder and turned the mug she was holding in her hands.

"I started dreaming of her a while ago. At first, she was just a presence, making me feel safe, protected. Being with that ethereal form felt as though the yoke I was carrying as 'the Captain' was gone. The first time I heard her voice in my dreams she said - Why settle for something short when you can have something everlasting?" She paused, taking a small sip from her drink. "It took me weeks to realize it was her. Should have realized it sooner though: making me feel calmer was a dead giveaway."

"I believe your father once said that in the Starfleet Commander's Manual there was a chapter dedicated to 'hindsight 20/20'." Her daughter returned her eyes to her to see her check the time. "It's late, dear, and they're starting to debrief you tomorrow. I think we should head to bed. Oh, and do think of growing your hair back, you look so much prettier with your hair long." Nodding her agreement with a smile, Kathryn reached for her mother's cup offering wordlessly to take it to the sink. When she turned away, her mother called out after her. "Kathryn, do you think they have a holovid of your performance?" Kathryn threw her head back and releasing a throaty laugh.

"I was wondering when you'll get around to asking." With a glance back, she noticed her mother's slight blush before the woman headed to the other bedroom. Chucking softly, she quickly rinsed the mugs, knowing how displeased her mother will be if they were altered by the replicator, and headed to her bedroom.

_**Knocking wove into her consciousness and Kathryn sighed before she got out of bed and pulled on her robe. She drew it closed around her body as she headed for the source: her front door. A final tug on a piece of silk and the robe was firmly in place; stretching to her full height, she opened the door. "Seven?" In her surprise to see the other woman at her door at this time of night, she didn't even register stepping aside and motioning for the blonde to enter. "It's the middle of the night, what are you doing here? Are you alright?" The Borg woman nodded at her once.**_

_**"I am fine."**_

_**"Then what..."**_

_**"I needed to see you." The reply came before she could even finish her question. "I have missed you, Kathryn." The older woman could barely suppress a shiver as her name was all but purred from the full lips before her. Stepping forward, Seven was now well in her personal space.**_

_**"I..." she gulped "I've missed you too."**_

_**"You have?" The slow, soft tones in which the question was asked made her knees feel weak. She managed to nod. "Then why have you not visited me Kathryn?" The woman before her asked, moving even closer "Or sent word. You are one of the only three people who know when I regenerate." **_**One of three...**_** The words felt like a rush of cold water against her skin. Sidestepping the blonde, she tried to will up her captain's mask, but she didn't take two steps before being abruptly stopped and turned, leaving her enveloped in soft arms, her face centimeters away from the other woman's full lips. Noticing the smile on her captor's face, she froze. "I wanted you there, Kathryn. I would dream that when I wake up, I would see you standing close. I would dream that you would do this..." With the words dying on her lips, Seven lowered her head and kissed the smaller woman, robbing her of breath in seconds.**_

_**"Seven... I... we need..." She panted when she was finally able to move again, to remove the delicious press of lips from her own. "We need to stop... my mother..." Seven merely smiled, pulling her closer.**_

_**"Then we shall have to relocate." The sentence ended with soft lips pressing against her own, this time accompanied by the insistent press of a tongue tracing her bottom lip. She was oblivious as one of her hands reached up to tangle in blonde strands, messing up the neat bun, while another reached behind the woman's back to grab hold of the nearest shoulder as the tongue demanded entry more firmly with each passing moment. Opening her mouth to the woman was nearly mind-blowing as electrical currants ran from her mouth to every organ in her body, making her knees buckle. Moaning into the kiss, she tightened her hold and felt the arms about her waist do the same as they started moving in what Kathryn vaguely registered was the direction of her bedroom.**_

_**When Seven pulled her back, her head was reeling. They were in her bedroom, her door had clicked shut behind them seconds ago, and she was in Seven's arms, holding on for dear life as the taller woman lowered her lips to the pulse point at her neck, lavishing it with kisses, licks and gentle nips. Head rolling to the side, she fought to keep her eyes open, to be able to see the blonde as her hands worked to free the pins that kept silky soft hair from her fingertips. When she removed the final pin, she couldn't suppress the gasp as teeth gently bit at her throat, not hard enough to mark, but hard enough to make her close her eyes and gasp for breath. "Seven..."**_

_**"Let me, Captain. Please, let me..." The blonde didn't need to finish her whispered sentence as her hands traced Kathryn's hips, reaching between them to finger the silk belt holding her robe closed. Swallowing hard, she nodded, mesmerized as the tender touch undid the knot within seconds, and then again as soft hands were at her shoulders, pushing the fabric away to pool at her feet. The look in Seven's eyes as the thin fabric was removed conveyed only one thing: fierce hunger.**_

_**When soft lips pressed onto hers again, she couldn't help but moan as her hands reached to pull the taller woman closer to her, to feel the curves and muscle press against her own. She could feel the heat rising within her as their tongues danced together, each millisecond raising the need to touch, to be touched, and to see the body pressed up against her own. "Seven..." Her voice, a husky whisper, was deeper then she had ever heard it. "I want to see you..." Seven's lips quirked in a slow smile.**_

_**"I will comply." Gentle hands roamed up her sides, making her shiver before stopping at the base of Seven's neck, and the woman reached back to undo a small clasp that held her bio-suit together. The material seemed to melt from her body and when they pressed together again the smaller woman couldn't help but arch into the contact, trying to touch as much of the pale skin as she could. Shifting her head slightly she pressed her lips to the neck so tantalizingly close, kissing the expanse of skin before her. "I want you, Captain." As the familiar designation left the Borg woman's lips, Kathryn could feel a feral grin spread on her face before she gently bit down on the skin under her lips, just enough to draw a ragged breath.**_

_**The sound sent her mind spinning and she pushed them forward, her shorter frame covering Seven's as they fell on the bed. She felt hands on her back pulling her close even as she relinquished her hold to brace for impact with the mattress, wanting to keep the weight of her fall off the younger woman. But once she felt the weight below her, she could control her self no longer and her hands started running, as if of their own accord over the lithe flame, memorizing sides, stomach and impossibly long legs with her touch.**_

_**"Kathryn..." The woman beneath her shifted slightly, causing one of her legs to come between the older woman's while the other was raised to fold itself around her hips, pushing their bodies so close together that there was no space left between them. The auburn haired woman gasped as the sensitive skin between her legs came to contact with the expanse of pale skin covering deceptively strong thighs, but her next sound, a deep guttural moan, was swallowed an instant later when Seven raised her head to kiss her again.**_

_**Stars swam before her eyes as the kiss continued, their speed and energy intensifying until the woman noticed that their hips were moving in time with one another. Each rock from her hips was answered by one of equal force from the other woman, and as they moved together, time seemed to slow down, each move becoming long, almost teasing. She rolled her head back when she felt warm fluids against her thigh, and Seven seized the opportunity to claim her neck, and all the way up to her earlobe marking her with kisses and gentle nips.**_

_**At the first touch of the warm moist tongue against her earlobe, time came crashing around her, and their bodies began to pick up the speed they had missed before. What had been a soft, gentle, touch intensified both in speed and intensity. Her hands reached for the other woman, one burying in soft hair while the other reclaimed its place on her shoulder as waves began to ripple through her body, making her shake from the inside out. "Seven!" she cried, knowing she was not far from her peak. She had wanted this too much, had waited too long for this woman to be able to hold herself in check for long.**_

_**"Let go Kathryn." The husky whisper along with the rise of hips sent her over the edge, and she closed her eyes as the orgasm washed through her body, leaving every muscle taut, and every nerve ending singing.**_

Opening her eyes only caused her to close them tightly again a moment later as a strangled groan escaped her lips. Pushing her head deeper into the pillow, she tried to will the images away. _This can __not__ be happening. Not when tonight is the official 'welcome home' party Starfleet is throwing..._ Untangling her body from the blanket and sheets that tied themselves around her, she took a moment to sit at the edge of her bed, running her fingers through her hair before a sensation caused by her movement registered in her head. _I have to stop thinking like this... She's with Chakotay. She is going to marry him. I need to stop thinking like this..._ Getting up and purposefully ignoring the wetness between her legs she made her way to her shower, shedding her nightgown and underwear as she went.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimers: Same as before, only that the characters you don't recognize are mine.

* * *

The past 5.852 months since Voyager's landing on earth had been most disconcerting. Seven discovered that she still felt uncomfortable and uneasy surrounded by a large amount of people, even if her fears about being shunned or feared because of her past did not come true. In the months that passed, she hardly spent time alone. When not at debriefings or various other meetings, her time was mostly divided between her Aunt Irene and Chakotay, but something was amiss. She realized what it was at one on the monthly get-togethers that Tom and Chakotay seemed so fond of, when the Captain had canceled at the last minute due to last minute orders sending her to Vulcan. She missed the older woman. Even now, after all this time, she looked forward to seeing her for more than the small gatherings and occasional calls, but it seemed that it was all her Captain was able to give. With each passing week the woman seemed to be more and more tired, even slightly depressed, and Seven realized she wanted to see her alone, to help her as she faced the demons, and to give her comfort. It was that last thought that troubled her most and she tried to ignore it, along with the feeling that would often crop up along with it; it had no room in her quest for perfection.

At the moment, her focus was on the "soiree" as her aunt had called the event thrown by Starfleet at the headquarters to mark the end of the debriefings, as well as the final conclusions in regards to Voyager's crew. They were told that this event was a formal one, but that the men and women of Voyager should not wear their uniforms, a directive that left her puzzled but seemed to please her aunt greatly. The woman had insisted they head to a shopping center to get Seven prepared for the occasion. Frowning slightly to herself, she noted that if Chakotay did not arrive within the next 2.7 minutes, they would be late.

The Commander arrived 1.75 minutes later and seemed pleased to see her in the impractical dress that her aunt had insisted she acquire and wear for the night. After handing her foliage, which was to be put in a vase before they left, the two headed off to the transport sight.

"You look radiant tonight, Seven."

"Thank you Commander, but you have remarked this before."

"Seven," the man sounded almost exasperated. "I handed in my resignation nearly a week ago. I'm nobody's commander, just Chakotay."

She smiled at him as they stepped up to the transporter pad. "As you have told me once yourself: old habits die hard." He smiled back before asking them man on shift to energize.

Upon walking into the hall where Starfleet chose to conduct the party, Seven couldn't help but open her eyes a little wider as she took in the sight before her. It was a large room, her trained eyes quickly supplying its measurements as twin blue eyes ran across the room and its occupants. It was slightly difficult to recognize people in their fancy attire, so different from how they usually dressed. But for one person this was not the case. The rich auburn color of her hair stood out, even more so due to her choice of attire. The Captain was talking with a group of admirals, her back mostly turned in their direction, but her identity was unmistakable. The emerald gown sent her hair aflame, and the way she had styled it, pulling it in a French twist with several strands loose framing her face, made her look more feminine then the blonde had ever seen her. Her eyes continued their inspection of the older woman's dress, noting how it hugged her figure and accentuated her curves in a way that her civilian clothes never quite managed. Pulling her out of her reverie with a gentle touch to her forearm, Chakotay used his head to gesture at the other side of the hall, opposite to the _vision_ she was looking at. She frowned. "I see Tom and B'Elanna, let's go say hello."

One hour, 26.35 minutes later, after five admirals, three captains and 15 commanders stopped by to engage in pointless conversation, the four senior officers found themselves standing together again, and Seven noticed another individual approaching from the corner of her eye. She took a breath, wanting to brace herself, but when the two approaching finally stopped in front of their little group, she felt that breath almost leave her in a rush. The woman before her was so beautiful it caused a physical reaction in her. The emerald of Captain Janeway's dress was even more pronounced when standing close and Seven took a moment to take in the dress, so different in style from her own. Its décolletage demurely cut in what she was told was referred to as a cowl neck, showing only the very top of the other woman's breasts, while the fabric hung in loose folds and whispers of fabric that drew closer together from the shoulders until fitting snugly against hips and stomach. The lower part of the dress was loose and hid the legs beneath it while swaying gently as the woman walked. _But the color…_ She couldn't seem to stop thinking of that color, or rather at the way the color of the dress contrasted with that of her hair. She had never thought that two battling elements could look so _beautiful._

"Hello, Seven." The older woman smiled warmly at her and she had to tear her eyes away to smile back.

"Hello, Gretchen, Captain."

"Kathryn." The younger Janeway corrected with a smile. "I told you this before: we are no longer on Voyager, so you can call me by my name." Gray-blue eyes looked at her in silent appreciation and she fought to suppress a shiver. "You look beautiful. The dress suites you well."

"Thank you, Kathryn."

"Ah, Mrs. And Captain Janeway, finally." A feminine British accent said behind them, causing the two women in question to turn "How are you?"

"Tesler!" Seven noticed how, once seeing the newcomer, Kathryn's surprise and happiness grew. Next to her, Chakotay tensed.

"That's **Admiral** Tesler to you, oh disappearing one." The other woman corrected, all traces of her accent gone as she opened her arms to hug each of the Janeway women. The following introductions were informal and brief. "I wonder where Ellane turned to... I know she'd love to see you again."

"Ellane?" Kathryn's voice took on a thoughtful note. "Kai Ellane?" The Admiral beamed and nodded. "You two got together?" She turned to glance at her mother who sighed.

"They married about five years ago. I could hear your voice saying 'I told you so' throughout the entire ceremony."

"Wait, you knew all the way back then?" The response to the Admiral's surprised question was a shrug.

"There was something in the way you two would look at each other."

"There we go. Excuse me, don't you dare disappear before we come back."

When Admiral Tesler returned 84.36 seconds later, she was accompanied by a short brunette wearing a pale pink dress. "Ellane, you remember Kathryn Janeway, right?" _A woman?_ As the others around her conversed, Seven couldn't stop her mind from racing. Everybody in their group seemed to react well to the couple, showing genuine warmth. All except Chakotay, who seemed apprehensive, even uncomfortable. _He is the only one. No one else seems to find the presence of the two women unsettling. Could it be that..._ A hand on her forearm snapped her from her thoughts.

"Seven," she looked into Gretchen's concerned gray eyes, noting the same expression on Kathryn's face. "Are you alright?" Before she could answer, a bald man in a captain's dress uniform stepped close and tapped Kathryn on her shoulder.

"Pardon me for interrupting." The man spoke with impeccable manners, making eye contact with the entire group before turning his attention to the auburn haired woman to ask her the question. "Hello Kathryn, I was wondering if I may have a moment of your time." His eyes and face were kind, but when Kathryn nodded before taking his hand and following him to the dance floor and put her arms around him for the dance, Seven decided she did not like the man. Whoever he may be.

"I think we've lost her," said a smirking B'Elanna, causing her focus to return to the group.

"Explain." Tom smiled at her.

"That was Jean-Luc Picard." He inclined his head in the direction of the dance floor where Kathryn was laughing in the famous captain's arms as they danced. "He's known as quite the charmer, though I don't recall him being serious about anyone."

"He was always too much of a Starfleet Captain for that," remarked Admiral Tesler.

"Nonsense. Being a Starfleet Captain doesn't mean you can't love anything other than your ship. The other person just needs to be special enough." She was slightly surprised to see Gretchen's eyes land on her as she spoke. She managed a tight smile at the older woman. _This is too much..._ With this thought, Seven suddenly realized that if they had still been on Voyager, she would most likely head to the Captain's quarters to ask for aid in clarification of this matter. How could she do that now? She wasn't sure why she was even thinking is as thoughts of, "Seven, would you mind accompanying me to the restrooms? That is, if you don't mind this old woman stealing your date, Chakotay." She asked with a smile. "I would really rather not navigate through here alone." Seven nodded her consent, and then lifted her ocular implant as the woman reached from inside her arm to place her hand just above the inside of Seven's elbow before turning them away.

Only when they were out of earshot from the group did the older woman speak again. "You seemed just about ready to bolt back there. I hope you don't mind that it was me who took you away."

"Not at all. Thank you."

"You're welcome." Along with the reassuring smile came a quick intake of breath that Seven recognized as 'steeling one's self'. "I hope you don't mind me asking, but what happened? You turned so pale for a moment that I was afraid you might faint." Turning slightly, she regarded the older woman carefully. On the one hand, the woman in from of her was Kathryn's mother. While as on the other hand... She took a deep breath, realizing that even though the color was different, the two Janeway women shared the same eyes, and she was just as unable to deny Gretchen's concern-filled look as she was Kathryn's.

"When I was learning about dating on Voyager, the Doctor had informed me that a couple consists of a male and a female. So I had evaluated potential... mates, from the male portion of the crew. But when Tom Paris, B'Elanna, the Commander, and I attended Neelix's last talent night..." Her voice died down as she thought of the best way to phrase herself.

"Where Katie sang?"

"Indeed." She nodded, partly surprised that her companion had known about that evening, as well as at the quirked eyebrow that caused an expression that didn't match the older woman's tone. "After the performances were over, the four of us were returning to our respected quarters and the topic of the Captain's song was brought up by Tom Paris. While we had all agreed that it has been a beautiful performance, the Commander also remarked that a romantic affiliation between two members of the same sex was wrong."

"He did?" Surprise was evident in Gretchen's voice.

"Yes. I have also conducted research on the matter and discovered that this belief was common." Gretchen's brew furrowed in confusion, and she opened her mouth to speak only to close it again before attempting to try again.

"Which database did you search, dear? As far as I know homophobia had been all but extinct by the late 21st, early 22nd century. There are exceptions, of course, but the general society doesn't care one way or another." Releasing the blonde's arm, she turned to lean against the nearby balcony rail, her eyes never leaving Seven.

"I..." Blue eyes grew in wonder. "I am not sure..."

"Then I believe it's time to conduct more research," came the response from the now smiling woman.

"I concur."

"Good. Now let's go find that restroom." As she replaced her hand on the blonde's arm, Gretchen Janeway couldn't shake the feeling that they were being watched.

* * *

Dear M. , I hope you didn't mind me borrowing your name, your image just popped mind when looking for a name for this character, and well...

Let me know if it does though, I'll change it.


	6. Chapter 6

"Good morning, Captain Janeway." The rich baritone shook her from her thoughts and she looked up at the smiling man.

"Captain Picard," she replied with a tone just as formal as his had been. "We're both off duty, so please," she motioned to the seat next to her, "call me Kathryn."

"In that case – please call me Jean-Luc." He smiled at her as he placed his cup on the table before taking a seat at the offered chair. "What brings you here at this early hour?"

"Preparing for a meeting with Admiral Paris, though I could ask you the same question," she commented with a tilt of her head as he reached for his drink.

"Deployment orders." It took a few moments, but conversation soon flowed between the two captains. The uneasiness that surrounded Janeway like a halo before the man's arrival left her in a rush, though she did keep an eye on the cafeteria door.

"I have never quite felt that connection to Shakespeare. I find his work a bit too... dark. Maybe if he didn't feel the need to kill off every character who felt an extremely strong emotion…" she added with a smirk. "I prefer Emily Dickinson, even if this is taking us into a different genre."

"There is far more to his plays then 'Romeo and Juliet' and 'Hamlet.' There are 'The Tempest', 'The Twelfth Night'; he didn't only write tragedies."

"I suppose you're right. But I reserve my right to be skeptical until proven otherwise."

"A show of true Vulcan logic." He saluted her with his glass and a smile. A movement just off the corner of her eye caught her then and Janeway turned her head only to feel her body freeze. Across the room, dressed in casual black slacks and a button-down shirt that can only be described as 'medical officer blue' walked Seven of Nine. Her hair was pulled out of its customary twist and into a tight braid that ended between the woman's shoulder blades. Absently, she put her hand on his forearm, signaling for him to wait as she tried to rise to her feet and called out the younger woman's name. When the blue eyes that had haunted her dreams for so long found her own, she couldn't help but smile. But it was only when those very eyes turned to look at her hand, the one still placed on Picard's before returning to her own with a small smile that she knew was partly forced, did she remember she was still touching the man. She tried her best not to jerk her hand away.

"Seven, come join us."

"I do not wish to intrude."

"Actually," Picard countered as he too rose from the table, "I must get going. It has been a pleasure, Kathryn." He inclined his head at her.

"Likewise, Jean-Luc. Good luck on your mission."

"Thank you. Goodbye, Kathryn, Seven." She couldn't help but frown at the man's retreating figure for a moment before shaking herself and gesturing to the chair across from where the famous captain had just sat. She locked eyes with Seven before making sure the barista was aware that Seven was sitting with her, and her order was expected to follow them.

"I'm sorry, Seven. I hope he didn't offend you." Returning her eyes to her companion, she had to remind herself not to stare. _Breathe Kathryn, breathe_.

"There is no need for concern. I am aware of the Captain's assimilation and of his subsequent dislike of anything Borg." With a dismissive wave of her hand, Janeway stopped her.

"Regardless." The barista came by with Seven's order, a light breakfast, and placed it before her, smiling at her before he left. Deciding a quick change of subject was in order, Kathryn picked up the first thought running through her mind. "I know I already told you this last night, but you looked beautiful. The dress suited you well."

"Thank you, Captain." The younger woman replied with a shy smile and _is that a blush?_ as she reached for her fork. "You looked beautiful as well. I recall seeing you in that color only once before." She prompted the woman before her to continue with a raise of an eyebrow. "In sick bay, after you have started the resistance of the former drones." Suddenly feeling self-conscious, she ran a hand though her auburn locks.

"It tends to make me stand out," she mumbled.

"You have elongated your hair!" In her surprise, Seven's fork stopped half way to her mouth. Kathryn smiled.

"Yes, mother was very insistent, and I figured that if it gets too uncomfortable for me, I can always cut it again."

"It suits you." The blonde looked down and away before returning to her meal. _She's uncomfortable. Think quickly!_

"You're here early." Her response was a single nod.

"Indeed. I have an meeting in department 226 alpha, I was lead to believe they wish to offer me a position within the department, but seeing no one yet knows what rank I shall be instated, if Starfleet wishes to enlist me, the exact position as at the moment still... vague, we have opted for an informal meeting. I have also hoped to find some parameters concerning a research I wish to conduct."

"Oh?"

"A matter was brought to my attention last night and I wish to examine it."

"I see. If you need my help in any way..."

"Then I will ask." The younger woman completed the sentence with a smile. "But this is well with in my capabilities, thank you, Captain, for your offer."

"It's Kathryn, Seven."

"Kathryn." The woman echoed, her voice nearly causing Kathryn to sway in her seat with pleasure.

"Kathryn?" A voice to her left caused her head to snap up, and see that Admiral Owen Paris has finally arrived.

"You're late, Admiral." She teased her former commanding officer with a smile.

"I am not late, you are simply early." She laughed at this old saying of his and offered an introduction, which the two people at her sides declined.

"Seven," she turned back to the woman finishing her meal when the thought struck her. _I'm a sadist. Aren't those dinners painful enough?_ "I would love to continue our conversation." _Say you can't, say you're busy..._

"As would I, Kathryn."

"How about we meet for lunch over at the Night Owl? It's a small café down on Market St., say at... 1300 hours?" When the blonde agreed, her heart nearly jumped. She managed to keep her composure as they said good bye and she was led by the Admiral to his office, the conversation between them kept light as they reacquainted themselves with some of the more mundane details of each others lives.

Only when the door closed did the Admiral turn to her with a serious look. "Now that we are out of earshot - why did you ask for a formal meeting, Kathryn?" She sat herself in the chair the man had gestured at and watched as he sat before her as apposed to behind his desk. _Now that's a good sign._

"I wanted to talk about making Seven a Lieutenant Colonel." The Admiral's fingers laced together and he leaned back as he frowned slightly.

"Right to the point." She raised both eyebrows as if saying 'well, yes'. "Do you think that she would like that?"

"Honestly, I don't know. Between the debriefings, meetings" _Wanting to avoid spending time with her with Chakotay, or hear how he is the one making her happy_ "and the press, I have barely had time to talk to her, and when we did, it usually wasn't shop. However, I do think that that this position should be at the very least offered to her. She is more than capable, she served as a department head on Voyager not to mention that her experience and knowledge would benefit all. Also, from what she has just told me – 226 alpha have already approached her with a tentative offer."

"226 alpha? Of the research and development facility?" She couldn't help but smile at his impressed tone. "I'm surprised they took so long, I was half expecting them to contact her weeks ago." Suddenly, the man frowned before smirking a second later. "Nechayev is going to have a fit. I'm going to be honest with you, Kathryn; the topic of Seven of Nine has been debated long and hard in the Admiral's Council with conflicting and sometimes even heated opinions. Don't get me wrong – no one denies the help she had provided to Voyager ever since you... severed her from the collective." She tilted her head slightly questioning his pause. "I was about to say "adopted" her. I'm not old enough to forget how you think, Kathryn," he explained before returning to his train of thought, in the process missing the slightly pained smile that crossed Janeway's face for a short instant. "But you must understand: we have fought the Borg for a long time. People are suspicious, afraid. You could have brought back an angel that had been assimilated and severed – wings, halo and all, and people would still find that being difficult to deal with."

"Do you really think that they'll find it so difficult that they would be willing to throw away everything she has to offer? Especially now - when a part of Starfleet clearly wants to work with her?"

"I don't know. We plan on raising it to vote today. If it passes to her favor she could be walking the highroad. But if not, then I'm afraid the offer 226 alpha has made will be withdrawn."

"Then Owen, please let me talk to them."

"I'm not sure that would be wise, Kathryn." He took a deep breath before explaining. "Some, even among those who share our view, see Seven of Nine as your pet-project. That she was a challenge to you, one that you made work to your advantage."

"What!?" As her tone dropped and eyes hardened, the seasoned Admiral could finally see exactly why some people, of all ranks, said Kathryn Janeway's name with a hint of fear. "I **mentored** her on her way to become an individual. I was her **friend**. She was **never** my "pet Borg". What in the universe would make them think that?"

"Apparently it was the opinion of some people in your crew."

"What? Who?"

"Kathryn..."

"Owen, please."

"It was one man, Kathryn. No one else thought this way, but those two words will cause Seven great harm if you try to help her in such an open and out manner." She pinched the bridge of her nose.

"What do you suggest I do?"

"I'm assuming I'm not the only meeting you have today." Her small smile was the affirmative answer he was looking for. "Then I suggest you get to as many of those as you possibly can before 1500 hours, when the Council convenes. Maybe if you explain things one on one rather then to the council as a whole then you can make them see things your way," he smiled "again." Her smile broadened as she stood, reaching her hand out to the older man.

"Thank you, Admiral Paris."

"It's Owen, Kathryn." He smiled back at her as he too rose to his feet.

"I know."

"You really care for her, don't you?"

"Yes, I do."

"Then go win them over. Or threaten, it could work wonders with... well, I think you know who I mean, he was a teacher of yours." She laughed as he pulled her into a gentle hug.

"Again, thank you."

"Don't mention it. Now go, dismissed."

"Aye, Admiral Paris, Sir," she said with a smile before turning on her heel and leaving his office. Despite starting her_ rounds_ at 0900, when 1230 came around, and she was still quite a few names short on her list, Kathryn realized that her lunch with Seven was not an option if she wanted to crack the last few 'hard nuts' out of their shell. Sighing sadly, she compiled a message where she apologized and asked for a rain-check before finding a willing cadet to take it to the other woman.

~*~

"Aunt Irene, I have returned." She was unsure as to why her aunt wanted her to announce her entry every time she entered their shared dwelling until she had discovered one day that her aunt's hearing is failing to a slight degree, and took this precaution instead of scaring the older woman half to death, again.

"Hello, Seven," came the reply from the living room. "How did your big meeting go?"

"It has progressed favorably," she responded once she joined the older woman, taking her customary stance by the window. "However, nothing is final at this time due to decisions that need to be made in Starfleet command."

"Everything will be fine, honey, just you wait and see."

"I do not share your optimism," she stated before looking out the window and adding in a quieter voice. "But I do hope."

"Hope is very important." For a moment, neither spoke as Seven continued to look out from her window. Snapping out of her thoughts, she turned to face her aunt.

"If you will excuse me, Aunt Irene, I wish to conduct a little research."

"Oh, about what? Maybe I can help you." A moment of thought deemed this option to be efficient, even if slightly unsettling, and her logic battled her emotions for the answer to her aunt's question. In the end, her emotions won and the words escaped in a rush.

"Human sexuality."

"Human sexuality?"

"Indeed." Irene closed the book gently, keeping her finger as a place marker as she motioned for Seven to sit.

"Do you wish to have... to be intimate with Mr. Chakotay? Have you ever been... intimate with him?"

"No, I have not copulated with the Commander. I have not yet felt... prepared... to embark upon this stage of our relationship." Her aunt looked confused before she gently smiled.

"Maybe you could start be referring to the man by his name, it would reinforce your closeness." The blonde blinked at her before nodding once.

"I see. But my relations with Commander Chakotay are not the reason I wish to conduct my research." The older woman sighed.

"Oh? Then why?" Drawing back on the memory of her conversation with Gretchen Janeway, the younger woman found herself taking a steadying breath before continuing.

"When I was learning about dating on Voyager, the Doctor had informed me that a couple consists of a male and a female. So I had evaluated potential... mates, from the male portion of the crew. I was also led to the realization that a romantic liaison between to members of the same sex is... wrong. Last night, I was told that my information is in error, and I wish to remedy that."

"You want to know about same sex relationships?"

"Yes."

"Why?" the older woman was genuinely confused. "In all the time since you came back, you've only had a about handful of visitors. Wait... it's not that B'Elanna woman, is it, Seven? She's... nice, but she is **married**, honey."

"I fail to understand your question."

"The reason you want to do this research. It's not because of B'Elanna, is it?" _How absurd._ She raised the metallic implement along with her brow at the question.

"No, my wish to conduct research does not derive from wanting to copulate with B'Elanna Torres."

"Oh, then why?"

"Because I have received faulty information and wish to amend that."

"And there is no one who interests you enough to give you a second motive for this research – other then adding to your knowledge?" She sidestepped the question, wanting her own to be answered first.

"Was what I was told true? Is it acceptable to have a romantic relationship with a member of the same sex?"

"Yes, Seven, while it was frowned upon for most of history, same sex relations had lost their cultural taboo and become accepted in the 20th – 21st centuries. Homophobia took a while longer, but is now mostly gone as well. But you look though the information archives, I know that the written word will assure you." She finished with a gentle smile. "Will you answer my question, or are you not ready yet? You don't have to answer if you're not ready." For one of the first times in her life, Seven felt the urge to clear her throat in order to be able to talk.

"Kathryn." She whispered.

"What was that?"

"Kathryn." She repeated, louder this time. "Captain Kathryn Janeway."

"This is sudden, isn't it?"

"No, it is not. I had first started noticing the Captain when we were on Voyager," she replied, knowingly keeping her answers vague. _This is not the time to engage in irrelevant conversation. I must retire, I must find out if this is true._ "It has taken me a while to comprehend the true meanings of my feelings, but to my understanding these feelings were unacceptable, so I have been attempting to... suppress them. That course of action will be unnecessary if this development is indeed true." Her aunt smiled at her fondly and patted her knee before reopening her book.

"Then I suppose I'll let you go and research. Captain Janeway is a fine catch, but I suggest you contact Mr. Chakotay and inform him that you two will no longer be dating before you try asking her out."

"Asking her out?"

"On a date, honey."

"I understand."

"Good." Taking this as her cue to depart, the blond excused herself and went upstairs to verify the information supplied to her. It was 38.52 minutes later that the former Borg drone sat back upon her bed and put her face in her hands, an imitation of a pose she had seen Kathryn use, but up until now saw little use for it. _How could the previous search have been faulty?_ She tried using different words and search algorithms until finally finding her initial search results, and she stared at them in disbelief. The error was minimal, only a short word, but as it is in searches that encompass large amounts of information, she was thrown far off course and into early 20th century knowledge and imagery.

But things were different in this century. Kathryn's mother, and her aunt, had been correct: there would be no negative repercussions for their being together. Her body hummed at the thought. She could take Kathryn's hand. Hugging the smaller woman would be acceptable. As the image of Kathryn's face appeared in her mind's eye, she straightened, a thought crossing her mind made her shiver. _I could kiss her. But what if she isn't interested? We have had only minimal contact ever since Voyager's return... she might not..._ Rising to her feet in a swift motion, she shook herself out of that thought process. Her aunt had been right: if she was to pursue one romantic affiliation, she must first end the other. Contact with the Commander was in order.

_I shall shower first._ It took a few moments, but she recognized this emotion as trepidation. She was nervous about talking with the man.

"Seven, sweetie?" Her aunt's voice came for the lower section of the house as she stepped out from the bathroom.

"If you have not done it yet – call Mr. Chakotay and invite him to meet somewhere. It is considered very impolite to break news like this over a communiqué."

"Why is that?"

"Because of the impersonal note: it makes it seem as though you did not care about the time you have spent together enough to say it to the other person's face."

"It seems inefficient to ask to meet with someone in order to tell them that I am not interested in a seeing him." The silver haired woman chucked.

"It does, doesn't it? But this is not about efficiency, it's about showing compassion."

"I see." A loud ring interrupted what she was about to say next.

"I'll answer it. Finnish getting dressed and join me for dinner, would you?"

"Of course." She turned into her room, opting to wear one of the old bio suits she had worn on Voyager. The feel of the familiar burgundy cloth against her skin drew comfort in the face of the decision and subsequent action she knew she had to take, if only to set her mind at ease.

"Seven, it's for you." Her aunt called up at her as she exited her room and made her way down the steps. "It's Mr. Chakotay. Maybe he felt us talking about him," she added with a small smile.

"I find that unlikely. Thank you, Aunt Irene." She nodded at the older woman as she left the room to allow her to speak privately. Sitting at the desk, she looked into the view screen only to see a casually dressed Chakotay in his living room. "Good evening, C... Chakotay."

"Good evening, Seven," he responded. "How was your day?"

"It has progressed satisfactorily. And your own?" The human need for small talk still puzzled her, but after seeing how much it meant to those around her, she tried to adapt, even if she still regarded the activity as inefficient.

"It went well. I've accepted a position with the Quazor Archeological Institute over on Tertius Epsilon. They have made me an offer I can not refuse, and have offered to hold the position until after Starfleet finishes with the festivities of Voyager's return," he added with a smile. "But the reason I'm calling is because Kathryn's sister contacted me just a few minutes ago: she's throwing a surprise party of sorts at Kathryn's house this Friday to celebrate the decision to clear all of us, or rather, to clear Kathryn," he amended with a tilt of his head, "and she's invited us to come."

"Phoebe Janeway has invited us to the Captain's house?"

"It's going to be a dinner party, nothing too fancy. She told me that it would just be her, her husband, Tom, B'Elanna, maybe a friend of Kathryn's, and us." He lifted a cup to his lips before continuing. "From what Kathryn has told me about her in the past few years, she's probably just trying to get to know us better and hear stories. It should be a fun night."

"I concur."

"Good. Then I'll contact her and let her knew that we're coming." She nodded her assent before cutting in as he took a breath.

"I would like to meet with you beforehand."

"Of course, Seven, whenever you like." She resisted the urge to shift uncomfortably under the pleased look.

"Is tomorrow morning acceptable?"

"For you, of course. What do you say we meet up in the gardens by the headquarters? There's a tea house there that I think you'll like."

"Very well. 0900 hours?"

"I don't know about you," the man in the screen said with a grin, "but I'm a civilian now. So how about 9 a.m.?"

"I fail to understand the difference between the two designations."

"It's just different terminology."

She raised her eyebrow at him. "I see."

"I will meet you at the entrance there. Good night, Seven. Sweet dreams."

"Good night to you as well." When his image flicked of the screen she allowed her shoulders to slump slightly before retightening and heading out into the dining area adjunct to the kitchen.

"Are you alright, honey?"

"Yes. Thank you for inquiring. I will be meeting with the Commander tomorrow morning in order to change the nature of our relationship." She older woman cringed slightly as Seven took her seat at the table.

"Just remember to guide your words with compassion, rather then the need for efficiency. Breaking up is usually not enjoyable for the person on the receiving end. Here, try this." She passed a rather large bowl with salad to Seven to try. "It might not be a nutritional supplement, but it has most of the vitamins you need."

"Thank you." Throughout the dinner they didn't return to the topic of Chakotay, or Kathryn, but thoughts kept running through Sevens head. The man's casual mention of the auburn haired woman's name upset her in more ways than she could understand. She knew they had been close during the time they spent on the ship, but after nearly five years she still needed to remind herself to call the other woman Kathryn as she was asked, while Chakotay didn't seem to have that problem. The personal touch – the woman's first name - rolling off his lips with ease. She wanted to understand why.

Morning couldn't be there soon enough.


	7. Chapter 7

"Hello, Kathryn."

"Chakotay!" She nearly jumped at the unexpected voice coming almost from above her. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to see you actually," he said with a small pained smile.

"What can I do for you?" She was enjoying rare break in her schedule and opted to take it, along with her lunch, outside to the quiet of the gardens surrounding Starfleet headquarters. Here, on a low bench partly hidden from the world thanks to the miracles of landscaping, she felt peace. At least for a while. Looking up to the man who held the heart of the woman she loved wasn't easy. Not when that very man was supposed to be her friend and confidant, not when that very man remarked on a few of the looks she had thrown in the woman's direction before the two started dating.

She had denied any sort of feelings back then, claiming to merely be a concerned friend. But then again, she herself had not known at the time.

"May I?" He asked pointing at the bench beside her. She nodded and moved her book aside, making room for him as he sat down. His shoulders slumped, his entire demeanor radiating hurt and defeat. "Seven wanted to meet with me today," he started, his eyes looking away from her, at the centuries long symbol of the city – the Golden Gate Bridge. "We went to the little tea house that's right inside the walls." He stopped and sighed before turning to look in the eyes for the first time since he said her name. "We ordered, she told me she has something she must tell me, and then proceeded to break up with me." _What?_

"I'm sorry, Chakotay."

"Me too." The man beside her replied, looking away from her again.

"Did she say why?"

"She was reluctant at first, but yes." Blue grey eyes closed as she pinched the bridge of her nose. She had been listening to, and telling, stories for weeks now and found herself wishing that for once the speaker would just jump ahead to the punch line. "It appears that she received information that made her wish to reexamine things." His lips curled in a bitter smile. "Better then that – she wouldn't even tell me what that information was. I thought she was kidding! But apparently she isn't." He took a breath before returning his eyes to his former Captain. "I know that this has something to do with her aunt, or someone else, influencing her. Kathryn, please talk to her for me?" Her eyes widened at him. "Please, I know you two are still close friends, she'll listen to you. Me quitting Starfleet shouldn't matter, leaving Earth shouldn't matter..."

"You're leaving Earth?" The words stumbled out of her mouth before she even realized. This man, who she had considered a friend for most of the past seven years, was making this confession to her and this was her focus. _I could smack __**myself**__!_

"Yes, I've accepted a position with the Quazor Archeological Institute over on Tertius Epsilon."

"That's very prestigious. Congratulations."

"Thank you. And I was hoping that Seven might want to come with me once the debriefings are over and we'd be cleared."

"I... see." She gulped "And what did she say?"

"I've never gotten around to asking her." She nodded absently, lost in her thoughts before being tossed back to reality by the feeling of his hands taking one of hers. "Kathryn, please talk to her? Whatever it is, I know this is all some misunderstanding and that it'll blow over. Please." _I'm sorry Chakotay. I can't ask her. You see, I'm in love with her, and asking her to walk back into your arms and fly away from the planet might just kill me._

"Alright. I'll talk to her."

"Thank you, Kathryn." He beamed a smile at her and she tried her best to return it. _This is not the time to start losing control of that damned command mask._ "I really appreciate it." She sighed.

"I know that look, Chakotay. What else?"

"I was... uh… hoping you might be able to do this... before Friday." She quirked an eyebrow while gently removing her hands from his.

"Well..." he stuttered for a moment. "We have some dinner plans, and I'd hate to cancel them."

"Aha." She drawled, knowing that there was more to the matter then he was letting on. "Then I'll contact her tonight seeing as I'm going to face the Admiral's Council tomorrow and Friday."

"Thank you, Kathryn. I really appreciate this." She forced herself to smile at him. "I owe you. If there is anything..."

"Then I'll have you take the next shuttle back to Earth." She cut him off pointing the absurdity of his statement.

The cracking of a nearby branch caused them both to turn, Kathryn reaching instinctively for her belt, only to notice that the phaser she had kept there every time she was planet-side in the past seven years was not there. She relaxed when she registered a suddenly very red-faced cadet snapping to attention so fast that she couldn't help but wonder if the young man was going to have to be rushed to the nearest doctor to be treated for whiplash. "Yes, Cadet?"

"Captain Janeway, Sir." She sighed "Your presence it requested in security department gamma."

"At ease." She responded, getting to her feet. "If you manage to pull a bone, despite being fascinated at the effort, I think the medics will be quite upset, at me." The Cadet's stance didn't visibly relax. "And I don't care what then teach you and what protocol may be: you address me as Captain, nothing else."

"Yes sir, Captain." She sighed again as she brought her hand up to pinch the bridge of her nose.

"This is Harry all over again..." she mumbled under her breath before turning to face her, now standing, former first officer. "I'll talk with her. I can't promise you more then that."

"I know, and again, I thank you." She nodded at him, not wanting to touch and be touched by the hands and lips that held Seven so close.

"You're welcome. Goodbye, Chakotay."

"Bye, Kathryn." With one final nod, she turned and left, the cadet walking stiffly by her side.

"What's your name, Cadet?" He looked at her, clearly surprised.

"Dylon," her eyes caused him to pause "Captain, Dylon Aryean."

"Aryean? You're don't happen to be Betazoid, do you?"

"I am, S... Captain."

"Then I might now someone in your family: Oaso." The cadet smiled, relaxing slightly.

"He's my uncle."

"I served with him, quite a few years ago. He's a good man. If he remembers me – tell him I send my best." He beamed.

"I will." She smiled at the still visibly tense young man.

"You really must relax. You're making me nervous."

"I apologize," she shot him a look before he could finish with the automatic response. "Captain." Smiling at his recovery, she couldn't help but notice how he drew himself a bit taller as they approached the main compound and a small group of cadets came into view. When they were in hearing distance from the group, she stopped, turning to face her companion, and reached up to place a hand on his shoulder. "Thank you, Dylon, I'll manage from here. Don't forget to tell your uncle I said hello, dismissed."

"Aye, Captain." Smiling, she patted his cheek and left, barely able to hide her smirk. The next few minutes caused the smirk to be gone for the rest of the day. It was past 2000 hours when she finally made it inside her apartment, the chirping PADD serving as a reminder of her promise just hours _days_ ago. Heading toward the kitchen, she got herself a cup of coffee before sitting before the desk and reviewing her messages. Deciding that she has put this off long enough, she placed her cup on the desk and stood up to remove her uniform jacket, suddenly feeling uncomfortably warm. _Being inside finally got to me I guess._ The little voice in her head told her that she was being ridiculous and that she knew exactly why she was suddenly warmer, and that the jacket, or the coffee, had nothing to do with it.

She purposefully stomped on it before activating the connection. And reaching up to unfasten the clasps holding the garment closed. She was halfway through opening it when Seven's face came to view on the screen before her.

"Hello, Seven" She smiled at the younger woman.

"Kathryn!" The slight widening of blue eyes accompanied by a small, almost shy smile warmed her heart. "How are you? You are just now returning home?" Now that the jacket was open, she rolled her shoulders in order to get the garments own weight to bring it down from her into her waiting hands.

"I got in a few minutes ago," she replied, placing the black and gray garment on the table beside her. "Starfleet has me nearly constantly on either my feet or my toes." She sat down, adjusting the screen to a more comfortable level she tugged on her collar of the crimson-colored uniform shirt. "How about you?"

"I am well." _She's wearing the blue and gray bio-suit._ A slow smile spread on Janeway's lips as she took in the colors and how they brought out the woman's eyes as the blonde hair, in its customary twist, framed her face. It was almost as though they were still on Voyager. There was no Chakotay, no break up, no need to have this conversation.

"Chakotay came to see me today," the older woman said in an attempt at a nonchalant tone. "He told me that you two broke up." When the woman before her raised an eyebrow, Kathryn had to grab her hand to keep it from reaching out to smooth it back down. "He seemed pretty distraught about it."

"Indeed. He was not pleased when I had informed him of my desire to change the nature of our relationship."

"I can understand that." She smiled sardonically as she brought her mug to her lips "What happened? You two seemed so happy together."

"I have been presented with information that has caused me to rethink the affiliation that the Commander and I had partaken in the past few months."

"Information?" She nearly chocked on her drink. Looking puzzled, she tilted her head at the image looking back at her as she placed her mug back on the table. "About Chakotay?"

"No."

"And yet it made you want to break up a relationship that lasted for over six months?"

"Indeed." She inserted her fingers into her hair, unconsciously trying to recomb it, only to realize that now that it was longer, it was tied back. Leaning back in her chair, she opted for the next best move and reached up to remove the pins that held it in place.

"Would you like to tell me about it?"

"I would, but not through a comm vid. I would prefer to talk with you, not at you." Her hair fell down, held back from her face by the only two remaining pins as she moved forward, her concern darkening her eyes.

"Is everything alright?"

"It is. You need not worry, Kathryn."

"Are you sure?"

"I am." The older woman sighed. "Was that the reason for your call?" _Is that... confusion... or hurt?_

"It was an excuse." She confessed with a small smile. "Chakotay told me about your break up and of your plans Friday night, asking me to get you to reconsider, at least long enough for the two of you to uphold those plans. But even without his request... we haven't spoken in quite a while, have we?" _Shut up. Shut up. Shut up._

"I have missed out conversations as well." light blue eyes softened as she uttered the words, and Kathryn felt as though the oxygen was suddenly scarce in the air around her.

"You know you can call me anytime you wish, Seven. I can't promise that I'll be able to meet with you right away, but I've never stopped considering you as a friend and..." _I'm an idiot_ "what I mean is that if you ever want me – I'm here for you." _Oh great... __**much**__ better._ She inwardly groaned.

"Thank you." Suddenly, Seven looked up from the screen "Aunt Irene," she said by way of greeting. "I am conducting a conversation with Kathryn." On her end, the woman in question couldn't help but smile at the half-conversation she was privy to. There was genuine warmth in Seven's tone. "I do not understand the purpose of that interaction." The blonde said, her brow furrowing in contemplation. "Acceptable. Good night." Her eyes returned to the still smiling Kathryn "My aunt wished I convey a greeting to you."

"Convey a greeting? She asked you to say hello?" Seven nodded once before inquiring as to a possible reason, and soon their conversation turned to Seven's relationship with her aunt, as well as Kathryn's relationships with her mother, her sister, and her family. It was with a very conscious effort that she managed to stir clear of any sort of romantic topics, preferring not to get answers that will undoubtedly unease her, to questions she didn't wish to ask. Her focus on the task kept her from noticing as Seven did the same.

Nearly an hour later, Kathryn's stomach growled audibly causing the seasoned captain to stop mid-sentence and blush. "You have not eaten yet?"

"Not since lunch"

"I... apologize for keeping you." The younger woman's expression grew flustered as she spoke.

"You didn't keep me. Trust me: had I noticed I was hungry then I would have excused myself so that I could bring something over." Looking up at the chronometer, she sighed. "I didn't even notice the time... I'm afraid we're going to have to end our conversation here, Seven. I have a ridiculously early start tomorrow and I really should sleep beforehand."

"I concur."

"We'll talk again soon."

"Of course. Good night, Captain"

"Kathryn," she replied automatically. "Good night, Seven." Shutting down the connection, and then the screen, the auburn haired woman headed into her kitchen and towards the replicator, hoping that it would work alright. Seeing as she was headed for bed, she opted to have something that would quiet her stomach down rather then a full meal. So, true to her decision, she was out of the kitchen and headed for her bathroom adjunct to her bedroom in ten minutes time.

Her mind tried to wander, but she pulled it firmly back to the present, focusing on the task of removing and folding her uniform as well as setting out the new dress uniform. Now that the debriefings of her crewmembers had all been finished, the admirals were starting to call the people in one by one to announce their decisions. With some people that would require a fair bit of formality, and if tomorrow was going to be anything like today, well, making sure the garment was clean and pressed shouldn't take long.

_It doesn't really matter,_ she reasoned as she adjusted the stream in her shower to a pleasurable heat and strength. _I know I've made the right decisions on the way, and any other member of the crew was expected to do the same: follow orders, and follow heir conscious. The color of the shirt or the number of pips shouldn't matter in this._ Stepping into the shower, she let the water wash the thoughts away. Raising her head and closing her eyes she listened to the sound of the droplets against her skin, allowing the waters' gentle cascade to take with it the stress as well as the day's dirt. Turning about, she allowed her mind to drift, conjuring images of Indiana rainstorms, waterfalls seen on trips, calm lakes, and the spray of the ocean.

_The first time we had shore leave by a sea._ She smiled at the memory of the 10 full minutes she had spent trying to get Seven to get in the water before she finally gave up and headed in. The memory of Seven deeming swimming as an inefficient activity made her laugh. She opened her eyes, opting to do more then simply stand under the spray, but finally allowed herself to stay on the train of thought for the first time in months: _Seven._

When Chakotay came to talk to her, she was floored. Not only had he started a conversation with her, but the topic, and the request. It was a prefect excuse to get her will power to crumble: she promised she's call and so she did. _Called her to ask her to take Chakotay back._ She sighed _I must be a complete and utter fool. But what could I do? 'Hi Seven, I heard you broke things off with your boyfriend of the past seven or so months.'_ She ignored the little voice in her head that chose that moment to supply the exact number of days since she first saw the couple together. _'Well, I wanted to know if you're alright and if you want to go out with __**me**__ sometime.'_ Feeling ridiculous, she decided to stop her mind from racing right then and there, if only to avoid having the water run cold.

~*~

_This has got to be one of the longest days I've had all month..._ The sun was just beginning to set as Captain Janeway made her way down the street that led to her home. Resisting the urge to tug at the still uncomfortable white dress uniform, it took her a couple of moments to register that something was off. _Why are the lights on?_ She quickened her pace, momentarily angry that the uniform didn't allow her to carry a phaser. _One of those big ones... That are as long as my arm..._ She had to drawing on her command training and set her shoulders as she felt the anger flaring inside. Using it to sharpen her senses, she swiftly opened the door, and closed it silently behind her. The sound of movement from her left caused her to press her body against the wall, her fist clenched hard, ready to attack the trespasser.

"Kathryn?" The fist stopped centimeters from the familiar face.

"Adam?"

"Whoa..."

"Sorry." She dropped the hand. "What are you doing here?" The raven haired man seemed confused for a moment before realization dawned on him.

"She didn't tell you, did she?" Her hands planted themselves on her hips.

"Didn't tell me what? Phoebe!"

"In here, Sis." The cool reply set her teeth on edge.

"Is Morgan here?"

"No, she's with my parents at Stratford."

"Good. This way I won't scar her when I kill your wife." She grumbled as they turned towards the living room. But then the two turned the corner to enter the room, the anger was replaced with surprise. "Hi." She managed to breathe out as she took in the people sitting in the room. Tom and B'Elanna sat on the two person couch, her sister and Chakotay took up the opposite ends of the bigger one, and Seven, her hair down and dressed in a white sweater and light brown pants, sat primly in the chair.

Her mind chose to supply her with an almost forgotten image: the first time she had dreamt of Seven, or rather of the presence that she had later discovered to be Seven. _Recalling the blanket, or was it a cloak, was easy enough and the color__ - a mixture of white and light brown threads that looked exactly like the cloths the woman wore now._ Her heart clenched, and she did the only thing she could – she smiled. Then tore her eyes away to offer the others that same _hollow_ smile, all the while feeling over-dressed in the dress uniform.

A chorus of 'hi's and 'hello's returned her greeting, as she and Adam stepped further into the room, the man going to sit by his wife even after she stopped, having realized where her feet were taking her. "I understand I'm hosting dinner?" She questioned her younger sibling as her hands returned to her hips and an eyebrow quirked up.

"Yes, but lucky for you – I cooked." A huff and a smirk were her only response. "Very funny." The younger Janeway scoffed. "Now, go shower so that we can eat."

"Yes, mother." she replied in her best placatory voice, casting her eyes downwards in a show of mock submission before raising them again only to meet the amused looks of both her former pilot and chief engineer. "'Tis best I heed unto her, lest she sends me to bed without supper." With a final wink at the pair who were now openly laughing, and a 'hey!' from her sister, she turned and headed to the bathroom adjunct to her bedroom, only to lean heavily against the door once she closed it.

_They're here... She's here... With __**him**__... Pull yourself together, Janeway. If they reconciled, there's nothing you can do but be happy for her._ She stomped on the little voice that tried to suggest otherwise and pushed off the door to start the shower. _The sooner I get back out there, the sooner I can get this evening over with._ She reasoned as she tried to will away the image of the fair-skinned woman currently occupying her favorite chair.

Knowing that people were waiting for her made for a speedy shower and change, and she was soon ready to head out. Taking a moment to look at herself in the mirror, she noted the state of her hair and quickly pulled out the pins, opting to leave it down for the night. _Putting it up again will take too long anyway._ With that thought in mind, she made her way back to the group, the carpeting masking the sounds of her heels. She could hear them talking now – Tom, B'Elanna, Chakotay, her sister and husband, only Seven was quiet. Turning into the room, she found the five laughing, and piercing blue eyes fastened on her own. She could almost feel herself drowning in their depth, her heart accelerating so much she was sure it was about to beat out of her chest. Swallowing hard and attempting to get herself back under control, she took the final step that brought her into everyone's view.

"Katie, are you alright?"

"What?" she cleared her throat "Yes, why?"

"Your hair – it isn't big." She could see B'Elanna bite her lip to keep from laughing.

"You're hilarious, really." She responded in a dry, clipped tone. _Nothing like Pheebs' teasing to change a mood. Thank heavens._ "Don't you have some food to check on or something?"

"I actually did that just a few moments ago, and now that you're here we can finally go eat." With that she rose and invited the rest to the dining area, the four former senior members of Voyager's staff only moving when Kathryn gestured.

"You keep forgetting that this is my house, Pheebs..." She explained patiently when her sister rolled her eyes. They took their seats, Chakotay moving quickly between Seven and Tom on one side of the table while Adam and Phoebe took up the other, leaving Kathryn and B'Elanna to sit at the heads of the table, with the Janeway sisters closest to the kitchen, acting as both servers and hosts.

The proximity to Seven throughout the dinner itself played havoc on her self-control, but seeing Chakotay every time she looked at the blonde was even more gyrating on her ever-fraying nerves. Conversation was kept light, catching up, families, and some stories of their travels: nothing that forced her to pay too much attention seeing as her sister and Tom took most of the lead in the conversation.

"Phoebe, I gotta hand it to you – that was a great meal. Was it programming, or..." She beamed a smile at him.

"Thank you, no, I didn't cook it from scratch, I do the programming. The other two Janeways can get away with dirtying stuff."

"You cook?" The shock in both B'Elanna and Chakotay's voice was evident.

"Occasionally. I'm not nearly as good as mother is, but I can make some things without burning them."

"Unlike pot roast?" She glared at the man.

"That was one time, and I swear Q gave that replicator a personality too, just no voice..." She shook her head and stood up. "Let's move back to the living room, we'll be more comfortable there." The others nodded and got up, Phoebe still gaping.

"Wait, you met a Q?"

"More then one."

"And more then once..." She added to Tom's statement as she sorted the dishes to take to the kitchen replicator for recycling, her eyes not leaving the table.

"She is also the godmother to the first Q ever to be created by procreation. I will assist you disposing the dishes." Forcing herself not to look at the woman's eyes, she nodded her ascent while shooing her houseguests into the other room, and making her way towards the kitchen. They made short order of the dishes and when Seven stepped into the kitchen for the third time, she informed that the table was cleared. "Kathryn, I wish to speak with you."

"What is it, Seven?" Janeway replied, grabbing a towel to wipe her hands on.

"Chakotay and I did not come to this dinner as a couple." Her hands stopped.

"Huh?" _Lovely, Kathryn, very eloquent._

"Your sister has invited the two of us to this dinner, and while the Commander and I have ended our romantic affiliation, I still wanted to attend. When I came, he was already here." She paused. "I believe this was one of the only times I have seen him arrive early." The older woman allowed herself a small half-smile at the words, but stiffened when she saw the blonde take a deep breath. The small voice in her head recalled that the Borg had never been so emotionally affected as to need to take a deep breath before saying something. "Do you remember when we spoke two nights ago?"

"Of course."

"I told you that when we met, I would tell you the reason I have ended my romantic affiliation with the Commander." All Kathryn could do was nod, suddenly wanting to flee the room, but knowing that where she stood, the small of her back pressed against the counter, and Seven facing her, she could not do it. "I am not, nor was I ever, in love with him." She stated almost sadly. "But for a long time, for the past 7.14 months, I have been operating under false data." The older woman's brow's crinkled together in her confusion. "I have... come to care very deeply for someone, but had thought this feeling of love unacceptable because she was a female." The towel nearly fell from her hands.

"A... woman?" With that one word, darkness engulfed her.

"Yes, Captain."

"Kathryn," she replied in a heart-beat, her distracted state allowing no other thought except the other woman's last sentence.

"Kathryn," the blonde blushed "I apologize."

"Kathryn, Seven, I think you guys might want to rejoin us." B'Elanna's head popped in from aside the doorframe, interrupting the question on Kathryn's lips as well as the taller woman's next sentence before they were even uttered. Locking eyes with the auburn-haired woman, she added, "Your sister in beginning to ask questions that you really should be there to answer."

"Oh good god..." She groaned as she moved, wanting to put as much distance between herself and Seven as possible. As she turned the corner, she placed her hand on the half-Klingon's bicep, giving it a gentle squeeze in thanks, and hurried down the hall, as fast as she could without having her legs wobble beneath her, _she loves someone else_, or running. _She's in love with another woman._

"What could be so bad that B'Elanna actually had to call me?" she aimed for a mocking tone, but was unsure whether or not she was successful as she moved into her favorite chair, her legs navigating on auto-pilot. Her sister huffed.

"Nothing, I was simply asking if in all the seven long years you spent in the other side of the universe," She turned her eyes to the couple beside her and to Chakotay, who sat alone on the smaller couch and motioned for Seven to sit by him. "Did Katie ever get laid?" Kathryn slammed her head into her hand, covering her eyes in frustration. _This evening could not get any worse. Could it?_ Raising her head again she noted that Adam was just bringing his hand from his eyes in his motion of exasperation, while Tom and B'Elanna exchanged glances and promptly clamped their mouths shut. Seven, now seated primly next to Chakotay, merely raised an eyebrow.

"There were three, though I'm not entirely sure about whether she really slept them..." Chakotay supplied, seeming not to notice the other's reaction. Noting the wine glass on the table before her, she reached for it, downing almost half.

"Oh?"

"And number four was dear Tom over here..."

"We were lizards at the time!" Twin shouts erupted from their throats. The Robinson's exchanged a confused look while Chakotay shrugged.

"You weren't with Jaffen, Kashyk, or Michael Sullivan..." he noted, still seemingly oblivious to the looks thrown his way by the occupants of the room.

"I knew you couldn't have been celibate for seven full years!"

"I never slept with them." Her voice was low, the tone almost full of menace as she locked eyes with her former second in command.

"What?"

"I did not sleep with any of them." Her tones were clipped and precise, cold anger beginning to lace itself in to them, biting into the numbness she felt growing since Seven's admission.

"What?!" Apparently it was B'Elanna's turn to exclaim, and Janeway removed her eyes from the man sitting across the room from her, and turned them to the dark-haired woman. "But we were on that planet for nearly three months!"

"I know." She shrugged at the woman whose confusion was like a balm to her anger. _She isn't the one who's trying to phaser below the belt here. She is just curious. Breathe... and don't look at him. Or at Seven... dear god..._ "I don't have a logical explanation for why I didn't, I just didn't."

"Logic is Tuvok's domain, you know why you didn't." The half Klingon insisted. She shook her head at that and leaned forward to place her glass back on the table.

"I really don't. We came close to it a couple of times, but I could never go through with it. There always seemed to be something pulling me back, saying that it wouldn't be right to do this with him just then."

"Not having sex for seven years isn't right." Phoebe interjected only to find herself on the receiving edge of one of her sister's force ten glares.

"You already asked me about me sex life. I answered you. Why the hell did you feel the need to bring it up again?"

"I never thought you were serious! I mean, I know you have this 'connection' thing, but seven years?"

"That has nothing to with..." she paused, took a deep breath, and closed her eyes as she counted backward from ten. Unfortunately, her pause gave another member of the dinner party the chance to speak.

"Phoebe, please explain the 'connection thing' you were referring to." Her eyes shot open to look the Seven in shock.

"Could we please stop talking about my lack of a sex life?" She sputtered, practically begging her sister with her eyes, as Seven's eyes on her burned her skin.

"Kathryn..." She raised her hand to stop her, daring to catch the woman's eyes for a brief moment before moving them to look at a spot just above her left shoulder.

"Seven, Please."

B'Elanna once again came to her aid and stirred the conversation towards the current events and their plans for the future, now that all that was left for those of them remaining in Starfleet was the ceremony next week that will promote them to a higher rank. It was during that conversation that Kathryn shut herself down as the thought of Seven's confession, of her admitting to be in love with another cut her soul to shreds. The calm, collected, and emotionally detached Captain Janeway, the same woman who has lead Voyager for over a month before their return home, cropping up to take her place for the rest of the night.

Only after she closed the door after her last guest left did she allow herself to resurface, then dragged herself feeling physically and emotionally exhausted, to fall on her bed, the pillow absorbing her scream and her tears.


	8. Chapter 8

Hi!

I know that it has been a r-e-e-e-e-e-a-a-a-a-l-l-l-l-l-l-y long time since I have updated this story, but RL happened, I forgot about it, then I didn't have a beta, some more RL, aaaaand - now we are here.  
I still don't have a beta for this, and I really, really, need to rewrite the ending. But my trusty Word counter says that from the point where this chapter starts and until the end of the story (at the moment) there are about 20k words, so I recon I have _some_ time.  
Also - if anyone knows someone who is willing to help me out and beta for me - I will reward you (and your friend) with cookies. Or Cornbread. Whichever I make first.

To sum up - The mistakes are mine, the characters are not, and the story is (finally) yours again, just let me know if you want to take it with you.  
Hope you enjoy!

A_Shadow

* * *

"Good morning, Kathryn." She attempted a smile at the familiar man's face as it appeared on her screen.

"Good morning, Owen. To what do I owe the pleasure?"

"To nothing – believe it or not: this is a social call. And I hope you don't mind me saying this, but you look like crap."

"You're too kind..." She husked, her voice still bearing the signs of her recent awakening.

"Anything wrong?"

"I couldn't sleep, and was plagued by nightmares when I could."

"Kath..." He sighed. "I'm sorry to hear that. Do you want to talk about it?"

"That depends: who's asking?"

"The same person who had to climb two and a half meters into a tree on the Janeway farm when you were eight, because you got your shirt stuck on a branch and had no use of an arm." She smiled at the memory and took a sip of her coffee as she wondered just how much she should tell him. After all, this man knew her well, even if he was a superior officer, but maybe shearing her secret with a second person might not be all bad.

"I'm in love, Owen." ha smiled warmly, waiting for her to elaborate. "This woman has been in my dreams for so long... Yesterday I found out that she's in love with someone else... and the dreams turned to nightmares."

"She?" His face and voice showed his surprise. "This is the first time you've felt this way for a woman." She nodded as he paused in thought. "It's Seven, isn't it?" She could feel the color drain from her cheeks.

"Is it that obvious?"

"No. Not when I was seeing things as an outside observer, but when you said 'in love' I couldn't think of anyone else that you have shown more then a passing interest in. Kathryn, she has been with... her boyfriend... I keep forgetting his name..."

"Chakotay." She supplied

"That's it. Such a silly name... She's been with him since before you returned. What brought this now?"

"They were never an affectionate couple, and she never said she loved him, then, about two days ago - they broke up. Or rather she broke up with him, because she's in love with another woman and up until recently thought that same sex relationships were frowned upon."

"What made her realize they weren't?"

"I don't know. We were interrupted thanks to Phoebe's over-inquisitiveness, and I never got around to asking."

"Was it a new thing for her?"

"Being in love?"

"With that woman, yes."

"She said she has been in love with her for months now."

"Did it ever cross your mind that maybe it's you that she's in love with?" A sad half smile appeared on her lips as she huffed at the thought and shook her head.

"Did you see her, Owen? Why in the world would she be?"

"Oh Kathryn..." He breathed, shaking his head in dismay. "Sometimes I swear you're schizophrenic... How can you be like this here, and have all the confidence in the world when on a ship?" He raised his hand to stop her. "You need to talk to her, Kathryn."

"I can't..."

"You have to get this out of your system before it eats you alive."

"It already has..."

"Then get it out of your system so that you can begin to build yourself up again. I want to see you happy, Kath. Not mourning a lost love for the rest of your life." Admiral Janeway's image flashed through her mind. "Promise me you'll think about it: what do you have to loose? If you ask her and she confirms what you think: that there is a different woman, then how much different are you from where you are now? And if she says that it is you..." he let the sentence die. She raked her hands through her hair.

"When Admiral Janeway was on board my ship, I realized that I was never going to get over her."

"She never had the chance. Your counterpart did not have your knowledge, Kathryn, you are not going to be the same."

"I hope you're right..."

"I am." He concluded with certainty before waving his hand in a vague gesture. "Or I will be, once you sort this out." She smiled crookedly at him. "I need to get going, we're going to visit my granddaughter." He beamed and she smiled back.

"Tell them I said hello, and have fun."

"Oh, we will. I will see you tomorrow, right?"

"1000 hours."

"Think about what I said."

"I will. Thank you."

"Whenever you need. And I mean it, Kath. Goodbye."

"Goodbye." Standing up from the PADD, she moved to the kitchen window, and looked out across the streets and onto the grand bridge that crossed the bay. The familiar pose had returned with ease soon after she had returned from the other side of the galaxy and she now found herself often leaning against the kitchen counter, her fingers laced together as she lost herself in thought.

It was hard to believe that Owen could be right, not after all this time, not when she has been with Chakotay, not when she never looked her up. But then again how could she blame Seven for not doing something that she herself failed to do? She had been all but avoiding the woman ever since their return. _Because they were together. I couldn't bear seeing them together..._ Insisting her inner monologue shut down, she refocused her thoughts on the older man's words. Could it be her? Could she allow herself to hope? Or will raising those hopes just get her in more pain then she already was? Possibly, but then again, this was a place where she had a fifty percent chance: she either was the 'other woman', or she wasn't.

She took a deep breath and rolled her shoulders in attempt to feel a bit more comfortable in the heavy uniform jacket. The breathe caught with it all the different smells that made this place so special to her: the brewing coffee, the hot dough from which the croissants were made, hot chocolate, as well as the gentle smell of bloom emanating from the ivy growing on the wall on the far side of the restaurant. For a moment she was once again the young girl, happy to be visiting her father at work, the older cadet coming with her friends, and the newly appointed Captain, all at the same time.

"Little Miss Janeway!" She turned towards the familiar voice of the gray haired man in the trademark tailored jacket, as well as black bowtie and pants, smiling broadly, having given up the hope that the now aging man might address her as anything other than 'little miss' years prior to Voyager's departure.

"Hello, Vincent." He hugged her as he came close, kissing her on both cheeks.

"I heard you're going to become an **Admiral**." He lowered his voice to a near whisper as he spoke, before returning to his normal tone. "Why didn't **you** tell me sooner?" She squeezed the forearm that still held onto hers.

"I was told to keep quiet, Vincent. You know that I wouldn't keep anything like that from you." He huffed in mock hurt.

"I should hope not!" He glanced around the café for a moment before returning his eyes to hers. "I'm afraid I can't offer you your favorite table tonight, Little Miss. A young woman came in a few minutes ago and **demanded** it. Quite fiercely too. Had I known you were coming I would have told her it was reserved, but you are a surprise today..." She glanced over his shoulder at the table that had been claimed as 'her own' ever since her Academy days. The familiar table was set at the far side of the café, near the wall that Vincent had once covered with a large net so that it could support the two kinds of ivy that Vincent has lovingly cultivated for years. One of them, currently blooming in a soft pink. On another side, the table was hidden from view of the passing-by by the bougainvillea _tree_ that grew just outside the window. Her eyes widened a bit when she saw the woman in question looking quietly back at her.

_"Seven?"_

_"Good morning, Kathryn." Her heart skipped a beat when the blue eyes turned towards her._

_"Good morning. What are you doing here?"_

_"I have been called into meeting with the Admirals. I believe that they will now announce their decision to grant me a position in Starfleet." She smiled at the phrasing, barely managing to keep her mind from straying into conjuring several positions that had nothing to do with Starfleet._

_"I see." She placed her hand on the other woman's arm, turning fully towards her. "I wanted to apologize for the other night. I was... I behaved poorly, and I was hoping that you would forgive me." A ghost of a smile appeared on the full lips as the woman regarded her evenly._

_"I forgive you, Kathryn," she smiled "but only on one condition:" her smile disappeared, "that you will allow me to finish telling you what I had started before B'Elanna interrupted us in your kitchen."_

_"I will comply." Janeway answered with a small half grin, earning herself a fond look from the taller woman. A look which nearly caused her legs to melt. "How about after the meeting we go to the Night Owl for lunch, instead of what I had to cancel a while ago?" Her smile brightened at her companion's nod. "I think we should go inside, the Admirals are waiting."_

_"Indeed." Seven nodded and reached for the door, opening it for the smaller woman, who smiled at her before stepping inside and snapping smartly to attention in front of the roomful of admirals._

"Little Miss, Are you all right?" she blinked, refocusing on the man in front of her rather then on the clear cerulean eyes across the room.

"I'm fine, Vincent." She smiled at him and released his arm. "I was just surprised: I came here to meet with the woman who demanded my table." She subconsciously gestured at Seven with a tilt of her head. The café's owner followed her gaze with his head slightly cocked to the side.

"Hmm..."

"Hmm?"

"I thought she was here for a romantic meeting... I'm not usually that far off the mark..." She smiled uncertainly at him, willing her fear down, suddenly glad she was no longer touching him as she was confident that her hands were now shaking. "Go, go, you can't keep a woman like that waiting."

"No..." She took a deep breath as she looked at the blonde again "You can't, can you?" With a final pat on his arm she left him and moved towards the waiting woman how began to stand as she approached. "Hello, Seven." She greeted "You don't have to get up."

"Kathryn," she greeted "I am aware that I am not required to do so. It is my choice." The dark blue of her shirt brought light to the former drone's eyes, and the older woman reached for the chair across for her companion, needing to sit down, before her legs turned weaker then they already were. The seat left her with her back to the plate glass window, leaving her free to look at the restaurant, and also gave her the benefit of not being to close to the woman who had such an intoxicating affect on her. _This meeting can go in either one of two directions. Keep your distance, Kathryn._

"Have you been waiting long?"

"No. I have arrived 2.8 minutes before you." She felt the smile tug at her lips again. _At this rate I'm not going to be able to stop smiling. At least until she tells me about __**her**__..._ "I wish to finish telling you what I had started at your kitchen during the Friday night dinner party." Her smile disappeared just as Vincent appeared to hand them two menus before promptly disappearing again, but not before placing a reassuring hand on Kathryn's shoulder. A gesture that earned his retreating back a raised eyebrow from the blonde.

"I swear that man is part feline..." Kathryn mumbled, running a hand in her hair.

"You are very well known."

"You mean Vincent?" Seven nodded once. "He started this place when I was 12, and I love it here, so I tend to come often." Another nod, and the auburn haired woman couldn't help but lean back in her chair, torn in her need to be close to this woman, and yet craving the minimal shielding that the distance would bring her. "What do you feel like having?" She asked breaking the short silence that ensued as she tapped the still closed menu in front of her. "The dishes here are all good, but some are better." Seven reached for her menu and stared blankly at the options before her for a few moments.

"Do you have a recommendation?"

"Probably, it depends on what you want to eat."

"I..." blue eyes blinked at her menu before meeting hers again. "I am unsure."

"Then you'll just have to trust me, I guess." She gave the younger woman a reassuring smile that felt a bit more natural when she saw the woman visibly relax a bit.

"I trust you, Kathryn." She called Vincent with a smile and a small wave of her hand and ordered something light for the both of them, along with coffee for herself and hot chocolate for Seven.

"And Vincent," she added as an after thought as he turned to leave. "Don't make them Irish." The silver haired man simply grinned as he left. "Somehow that grin just makes me more nervous..." She stated as she returned her attention to the woman in front of her.

"Explain 'making the drinks Irish'."

"It's an old expression that means putting alcohol in them. When the phrase originated the Irish were known for their ability to consume large quantities of alcohol."

"I see."

"You started saying something, Seven, about Friday?" _Masochist_.

"Yes, during our conversation on Friday I have told you that I am not, nor was I ever, in love with the Commander. And that for a long time, for the past 7.17 months, I have been operating under false data." Kathryn's brows crinkled together in her confusion, unsure why Seven was repeating herself. "I have come to care very deeply for someone, but had thought this feeling of love unacceptable because she was a female."

"You have said all this before, Seven."

"I am aware of this, Kathryn. However, I wanted to be sure that you remembered my words."

"Okay."

"That woman, Kathryn, is you." _I heard wrong. I know I heard wrong._

"What?" _This can't be..._ "Me?"

"Yes, Kathryn."

"You're not kidding..." Gray-blue eyes looked into the once across from her trying to find any hint on untruth.

"No, Kathryn."

"You're **in love** with **me**?"

"Yes."

"And you have been for months?" one hand reached up to her temple to absently rub away the shock.

"Yes." She closed her eyes, not sure if this was a dream that she'll soon wake up from, her mind playing tricks on her or reality. "I have distressed you." Sevens cold monotone drew her back and she opened her eyes to look at the woman before her, her eyes showing a hint of pain under the usual stoic mask. _This IS real._

"No! You just surprised me. I'm... I never thought... I wasn't expecting this admission. "

"What were you expecting?" the mask began to drop from Seven's face, leaving behind curiosity. Kathryn sighed.

"Something closer to what the Admiral had: having to watch you marry Chakotay, I guess. During all the time you were dating him, you didn't love him?"

"I did not."

"Then why did you stay with him?"

"In the beginning he was insistent, and I was pained due to the false discovery that there were social taboos about a relationship between two members of the same sex. Later it was due to inertia: it was easier to remain with him when I thought I could not be with you, than it was to end the relationship." Kathryn considered her words for a few long moments. "This upsets you."

"No, I'm just overwhelmed. I never thought that you might feel this way." It was only after another bout of silence, a few more moments in which Kathryn's mind was racing, trying to comprehend what Seven had just said, that Seven spoke again, her eyes everywhere except Kathryn's.

"I should leave." _She loves me..._

"And stick me with the bill? Oh no, you're staying right here." Hoping with every centimeter of her being that Seven might rise to the bait and stay, the older woman pulled out the one thing she knew might stop the Borg. "Besides, there is one thing you didn't consider, and I find that uncharacteristic of you."

"What is that?"

"Why I was so surprised, or maybe I should say – stunned." Seven tilted her head, as the truth of Kathryn's words was adsorbed.

"You wish to clarify?"

"I do." She paused, running a hand through her hair. "After your confession there's no way of saying this without it coming out like something out of a cheep romance story, but for the past... what was it now – 7.19 months?"

"7.17."

"I'm sorry," she corrected herself with a smile, "for the past 7.17 months, I've been trying to stop being in love with **you**." Seven sat impassive, but the confusion in her eyes was clear to the older woman, who reached out to take a hand in her own slightly trembling one.

"You are not..." she paused momentarily, looking at the joined hands as she searched for the proper expression, "pulling my leg, are you, Kathryn?" The blonde asked, her tone a guarded one.

"Why would I do that, Seven? What purpose would that serve?" She appealed to the logical side, hoping that the other woman would see the genuine warmth, and react to it rather to the absurdity of their situation. _For months... This has been going on for months..._ The memory of Seven during the recent Starfleet party came unbidden to her mind.

She noticed Seven's presence for the first time only moments after the woman had entered the room with Chakotay. She was talking with a couple of admirals, and their respected husbands and wives at the time, but the presence of this woman could not be denied. She couldn't put her finger on it, but she suddenly knew she was there, and when she turned a bit, supposedly to listen to her mothers' answer to some question, she saw her. She had let her hair grow, and had worn it down for the party, a look that made it seem as though she had a slightly curly golden halo around her head. She was facing Chakotay with a slight frown across her face. So slight that she wondered if anyone but the three of them was able to see it.

Her eyes trailed further down, as she allowed herself the momentary indulgence of taking in the tall woman's appearance unobserved. She wore a silver strapless gown, the color identical to that of the first bio-suit, and almost as firm fitting. The biggest difference was the lower part – this was a floor length dress. But unlike her own flowing gown the dress was tight. In fact, it appeared that the only reason she was able to walk was the slit that ran up her thigh until just higher than her mid thigh. She forcefully returned her focus to the people around her when the couple linked arms and walked in the other direction. She was breath taking, and she was walking away...

An hour and a half later she was struggling to stay coherent, and not stare, when she finally managed to bring her mother and herself to be in the blonde's company.

"I see no useful purpose, but..."

"I'm being 100 percent honest, my dear." Seven blinked and tilted her head.

"You have used that term before."

"What term?"

"Dear."

"I have?"

"Yes, we were on shore leave, in the main camp after the walk with Lieutenant Russom." The distaste in Seven's voice was obvious as she said the name, and Kathryn couldn't help but smile as she absently rubbed the back of the Borg's hand, trying to ignore the fire she felt spreading from the points of contact to the rest of her body as she did so. "You had stated that I was a terrible liar, and then proceeded to call me 'dear'."

"I did? I never noticed... I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable, then..."

"You have, but it was due to the fact that you have caught me in a lie, not due to your use of the endearment." When she noticed Vincent on his way over with a tray holding their food she let go of the other woman's hand and leaned back slightly, granting the man easy access to the table as he served. Once again, he was quick to leave, but not before giving both women a warm look and a smile.

"Go ahead, Seven, this dish is better hot, and we have all the time we need to talk." Seven nodded once as she picked up her fork to begin the meal. Conversation was lighter now, the atmosphere brought by the heavy confessions broken by the older man's appearance. As they ate the older woman finally let her eyes roam freely across the face and body before her. She noticed the smaller mannerisms now, the almost invisible quirk of an implanted brow before she ate something new, the look on her face when she enjoyed the food, and when she found it displeasing, the way she held her body, her posture perfect, yet relaxed, all at the same time. And her hands, the way they moved as she ate, as she spoke, as she listened, her right hand always leading the movement, he left usually out of site, hidden behind a forearm or the table. "Are you right handed, Seven?"

"Kathryn?" She knew that tone, Seven had used it so many times both on Voyager and since to ask her to explain without actually saying the words

"You seem to favor your right hand, and I guess I was curious."

"I see. I am more comfortable using my left hand, but I did not wish for you too..." she paused and looked aside momentarily before returning her eyes to Kathryn's gray-blue ones. "I did not wish for you to be uncomfortable by the Borg implant. It is… a flaw."

Surprised by the younger woman's confession and knowing that the way she dealt with this will mark the rest of their relationship, of their friendship and interaction, she reached her hand across the table, stopping mid-way with her palm up, her elbow resting on the table top. "Let me see it."

"Kathryn, I... I do not think this is a good idea."

"Perhaps. But you might be wrong. How do we know if we don't check?" She wouldn't relent, not on this.

"I do not wish for you to be uncomfortable around me."

"I was there when the Doctor preformed the operation to replace your cortical node, I doubt that your hand in mine will be more frightening then that." The younger woman was taken aback

"You feared?"

"Of course! I was scared to death that we might loose you." After another long moment of hesitation Seven reached and out her left hand in Kathryn's right, earning a bright smile at her willingness to comply. "Lets see..." She shifted her hold on the younger woman's hand and brought her left to trace the lines of metal and flesh. "Five fingers..." she mumbled, more for her companion then herself as she traced each one with a gentle touch, using the tip of her index finger to draw the contours of the digit and feel the alternating of biological and technological. She stayed a bit longer at the tip of each finger, looking at the metal tips more closely once she realized that it was not completely smooth but had microscopic ridges, not very different then the human finger print, the slight friction aiding her ability to hold different materials.

Once she finished inspecting each finger she changed the position of her fingers and watched it as it bent, before straightening it again. "Two joints and a knuckle..." She traced the lines of the implant on the back of the other woman's hand, never looking away from it was she experienced the feeling of the integrating bands of metal and flesh, before treating the thumb to the same treatment that the other fingers received, and turning the hand over to brush over the palm. When her inspection was done she raised her eyes to the younger woman's.

"It may be Borg, but I see no flaw." Neither commented on the husky tone to her voice, but seeing the blonde swallow with difficulty was all the reassurance needed that the unexpected examination had more then the desired affect of calming her fears.

Seven slowly removed her hand, looking into the older woman's eyes, still needing the reassurance that the woman across from her was genuine. "This is the first time that someone, other then the Doctor, had inspected any of my implants." She stated quietly.

"Really? Chakotay, had never touched you like this?"

"In the time we spent as a couple he did not reach for my left hand with his."

"Never?" Her response was one shake of a head. "What about when you..." she gestured vaguely, "he surely touched you then..." Just the imagery you need, Kathryn...

"We have never," mimicking the gesture Kathryn used with a small smirk, was explanation enough.

"What?" Oh god... "He didn't...?" The disbelief in her tone was obvious, and she couldn't finish the question.

"I was the one who did not."

"You did not want to touch him?"

"No, I did not want to copulate with him."

"He wanted to," she grinned at the blonde "copulate, but he would not touch any of your implants?" Seven shrugged. "But why didn't you want to sleep with him?" Seven looked away momentarily.

"I felt as though his touch was somehow... wrong. As though my clothes provided a shield that I did not wish him to penetrate." Drop it, drop it now.

"I see."

"Dessert?" Kathryn visibly jumped when Vincent's voice came from her side.

"Vincent! Do you even step on the floor?" He smiled at her.

"I'm not the preoccupied one, Little Miss. Would you like anything?" He looked from one woman to the other, "It's on the house."

"He means it's free." The older woman clarified for her confused companion. After a nod of understanding, Seven declined, claiming to be full. "Then no, Vincent, thank you. Just the bill, please." He nodded at her before leaving them "I swear that man is part feline..."

"You have stated this before." She smiled.

"Probably, I keep being surprised by him, no one else has ever managed to sneak up on me like he does. Except for you, maybe."

"You are unsure of whether I have caught you of your guard?"

"Oh, I **know** you caught me off my guard, but I can't remember if I have ever failed to feel your presence when you were in the same room as I."

"Even at the Starfleet party last week?"

"Even then." She assured with a husky voice and a smile. It wasn't long before Vincent brought the check and they were making their way outside. "I hate to say this, but I think we should call it a night."

"You wish to end our date?" Taking the Borg's hand in her own she smiled softly, hoping to reassure the younger woman.

"I had a good time, but..." she exhaled slowly, unsure of how she wanted to phrase herself. "This evening, while being... incredible, was also very difficult for me on an emotional level: first fear, worry, and hope regarding the person that I knew you were going to tell me you are in love with. You see, I never really thought it was me. But when you told me it was, I was overjoyed... elated even. And my mind is still reeling. I need to process this, make sure I'm not dreaming."

"I had enjoyed our evening as well. Perhaps I should pinch you." The auburn woman's eyes showed her confusion as she turned to face her companion.

"Come again?"

"Naomi Wildman has told me that the pinching of flesh is a manner in which one tests to see if they are in a sleeping or a waking state. She explained that..." Kathryn stopped her with a raise of a hand, her smile returning.

"I know all about that, and I have tested that theory out a couple of times throughout the evening, but that is not what I meant." Seven's smile nearly caused her to sway.

"I know, I was however hoping that you would change your mind." Looking down at the sidewalk the older woman considered her options, and realized that what she is asking for is, in a way, foolish. She wants to be with you tonight, and you want the same, so why not? She nearly sighed at that pesky little voice, but after all this time, all the want, the denial of emotion; a night of passion wasn't the answer. She raised her eyes back to the taller woman and cupped her cheek with her hand.

"I don't want tonight to be something that we did due to an emotional or a passionate haze. When we sleep together, it's going to be your first time, my first time with a woman, I just... want it right. Not something that we did as an ending to an emotionally taxing night, or so soon after your breakup with Chakotay."

"I understand."

"Please don't be offended by this."

"I am not. I do however, wish to go on another date with you."

"Me too."

"Tomorrow?" The older woman laughed at the hopeful undertone to the woman's voice.

"Tomorrow." Remembering something she had seen months ago in one of the Doctors dating lesson for Seven, her smile quirked playfully as she held out her arm. "May I walk you home?"

"Yes, Kathryn, you may."


	9. Chapter 9

_**She stood alone on the familiar grassy hill that looked over her family's farm and sighed as she put her arms around herself as if to ward off the nonexistent chill.**_

_**There was a lot of activity below her and she watched silently as the people below her, worked to prepare for a festivity, but she could not move to join them. She wouldn't move.**_

_**She was no longer a part of the group that scurried around there.**_

_**"Captain?" Turning her head to the left she saw Seven approaching her and took a moment to take the woman in – the light colored brown pants and crème sweater, the blonde hair that framed her face, the way she walked. She found that she could not look away, and for the first time since setting eyes on her surroundings, smiled a full and warm smile. "Are you feeling alright, Kathryn?" the taller woman asked once she had reached the hilltop and stood before her. "You seem upset."**_

_**Taking a moment to look down before responding the auburn haired woman discovered that she was in her old captain's uniform and raised her head in surprise "Yes, I'm... fine." Seven quirked an eyebrow at her.**_

_**"I believe you are being untruthful, Kathryn." She regarded the other woman evenly for a moment before making up her mind.**_

_**"Look down, Seven." As she said this she turned to face the farm, only to smile softly again when she felt the taller woman step behind her, hugging her gently as she placed her chin on Kathryn's shoulder and looked on. **_

_**Felling warmer, and happier, the older woman placed her arms around those surrounding her midsection, then continued "This is my family's farm, what I've spent most of the trip home missing and longing for. And now – I don't. Suddenly it's not home anymore. I mean it is- I grew up here and I know every rock, band of earth and structure, but it's not **__**my**__** home anymore."**_

_**Next to her, Seven was silent for a few long moments, only her breath audible. "I was once your one companion, it was all that mattered," the low voice surprised her when it came next to her ear. "You were Wishing you were somehow here again... Wishing you were somehow near... Sometimes it seemed if you just dreamed, somehow you would be here."**_

_**"Yes."**_

_**"But you are here again, dear Kathryn. No more silent tears, no more holograms, no more wrong choices." The blonde backed away slightly from her and turned the woman in her arms around to that they could face each other, and she could look her in the eye. "but I still need to know one thing? Who are you, right now who are you? Are you the Captain, or are you Kathryn?"**_

_**Words escaped her and she felt the heat from the gaze before her burn through her veins. "I'm..." she paused, not sure what can she say dressed in the oh so familiar uniform. "I'm both..." she finally managed to choke out, tearing her eyes away from the other woman, and towards a spot over her left shoulder. "I think... I don't know. I'm not sure I remember how to just be just 'Kathryn' even if I wanted to..."**_

_**"Then allow me to rephrase my question: who do you **__**want**__** to be?" She dared a quick glance the brilliant blue eyes of woman before her, before looking away again.**_

_**"With you? I want to be Kathryn, the woman, not the commanding officer, not the one in charge, just... me." She took a deep breath before continuing. "But do you..."**_

_**A finger on her lips stopped her from asking the rest of the question. "Whatever it is you have to give, Kathryn. I will not ask you for more."**_

The wind had picked up quite a bit since the previous night and by the time a fully uniformed Captain Kathryn Janeway was making her way through the grounds of the Starfleet headquarters to the administrative offices for a meeting. Nodding absently at a passing officer she couldn't stop running last nights' events through her head. The restaurant, the woman before her, the food, how she had touched her hand.

Groaning inwardly she tightened her grip on the uniform coat and bowed her head to the wind, making a mental note to pass through a restroom to fix what the wind is doing to her hair. Last night had excided all of her expectations. Owen Paris was right: she was the one that Seven loved. The evening at the restaurant was just as she had wished a date with the woman would be – it was intimate, quiet, relaxed, even comfortable, and it was just the two of them. If you forget about Vincent popping up at random intervals. She corrected herself with a small smile.

Parting from the blonde has been the hardest thing she had done in a very long time. Her whole body had screamed at her to lean in, go give in and give herself up to the feeling and loose herself with that woman. In that woman. But just like so many moments in her past she had chosen to listen to her head. The one who kept whispering that this would be Seven's first time, that the first time needs to be special, that giving in to a night of passion and lust might be grand, but making slow, sensuous love to the woman would be even better.

And that this night needs to be planed as a night to remember.

So instead of being with the flesh, blood, and metal woman, she was once again with the dream-version of her. The one she knew so well, but who was now not nearly as good as what she could get. I can get time with her. Not with an idea, with illusion, but with her... But can I do it? Can I be just Kathryn with her? She couldn't lie to herself about their past interaction, not after the months that she spent examining it, back when the blonde's relationship with Chakotay was relatively new, and she knew that even in all the times that they were close, in all the time they spent together as friends, she was always the final authority. Disobeying her meant punishment as her word was final, there was no higher. Now however, in love, it can't be so. Can I do this?

She smiled at the young ensign at the reception desk as she entered, and returned the good morning directed at her by the young Bolian who was no longer jumping to attention every time she walked through the doors. Ten minutes later she was standing in front of the door to her destination and barely managing to suppress a smile she knocked and waited for permission to enter. The small smile faded quickly faded quickly once she saw the expression on the face before her. "Captain Janeway, please come in." Oh no.

"Yes, Sir." Light brown eyes regarded her carefully for a moment, before speaking again.

"Have a seat. This conversation is going to be trying enough without us 'admiral' and 'captain'-ing the life out of each other, we did the mandatory formal greeting, so lets pretend to have continued, and be... more human to each other?"

"Acceptable." The auburn haired woman nodded in agreement before taking the seat in front of her counterpart. "Why did you call me, Tes?"

"I need to talk to you about two of your former crew." The woman before her raised a hand to stop the words she knew were coming. "I wouldn't be coming to you if before I've double and triple checked my information, and you know it." Is she fidgeting? "I'll start with the easier of the two: do you know anything about why Seven of Nine declined the offer to work with Starfleet this morning?" At Janeway's surprised look she continued. "I see the answer is no. Yesterday it seemed as though she's a hair's breath from signing in, but first thing today she declines."

"Seven likes to keep her cards close to her chest. She might not even been fully aware of the fact that people here were convinced that she was going to join. Did she give no reason for her decision?"

"She said that she had gotten some other offer that she felt more suited for her... how did she phrase it?" The admiral looked up as she tried to recall the words she wanted.

"Expertise?" Came the offer, along with a head tilt and a small smile.

"Something like that, only I remember a bit more arrogance... or confidence, I've seen her work." Janeway's smile grew.

"I'd say confidence."

"Of course you would." Brown eyes winked at her, and she shook her head at her old friend while trying herd not to blush.

"Who's the second, Tes?"

"Your old second in command. Did her tell you where he was headed?" Janeway nodded, and told her old friend what Chakotay shared with her. "Well, his story is good, I'll give him that. But there's just one problem with it: the Quazor Archeological Institute was closed last week after a long, though very well covered, period of financial difficulties. There is no way that they would have hired him. Not in the past couple of months, and if they did before, while he was still in the fleet," her intonation belayed how believable she found that idea, "than he would have gotten word at most a month and a half ago. The fact is - they could never have been able to pay him a salary, or even provide him with room and board. And if the rest failed – he would have known about the institute's closing." She huffed. "In short – the powers that be think something is rotten with the man. No, rotten is my word, they're saying 'a bit off'."

"I see..." Janeway's tone was apprehensive now, knowing the older woman as well as she did she was certain that there was something unpleasant to come.

"The order is to have a team follow him. Intel mostly, unless suspicions are correct, than they want a quick and clean apprehension." The admiral leaned back in her chair. "We want you in this."

"It's 'we' now?"

"Once I was given this to oversee, then yes, it turned from their idea to me adding mine." Janeway sighed, hand moving to the bridge of her nose.

"I don't want a part in this, Tes. Chakotay has been my second for seven years. I trusted him completely. Now you ask me to go stealth and treat him as the exact opposite?"

"I know he's your friend, Kath, but you must understand:" the older blonde leaned forward in her chair and placed her elbows on the desk before her as she gestured with her hands, "the people of voyager are the closest people that we have to him. No one knows more about him than you and your crew, amongst them, no one knows him better– than **you**. Except for maybe Seven of Nine, but she is an unknown to us, not to mention that she isn't Starfleet, so we can not use her in this operation. We need someone that we can trust. **I** need someone that **I** can trust."

"It feels unethical, Tes..."

"Think of Tuvok, Kath. He was in this position too in a way. Only this time I'm not talking with you about undercover, but stealth. It'll be a small team: you and two more, three at the very most. And hopefully all over by this time next month." The blonde rose from her chair and moved to sit closer to her old friend. "Look, I can order you to do this, but I really don't want to resort to that. I think that the person leading this team should be here voluntarily. "

"You're being an optimist again, Tes, no one from Voyager is going to happily go into a mission to find out if their former commander is a traitor." She huffed and closed her eyes as she brought her hand up to pinch the bridge of her nose. "I'll do it." She decided after a long moment of silence and raised her eyes, by now more grey then blue, to meet the brown ones in front of her. "I get to pick my team, right?"

"They have to be approved, but yes."

"I want Tuvok, B'elanna, and Tom Paris." She decided after a pause.

"That shouldn't be a problem." The older woman commented after a moment of thought. "Kathryn, I trust your judgment. I just don't want you blinded, in any way – we could be seriously wrong. And we have no idea what his motive is." Removing her eyes from her superior and friend Kathryn turned her gaze to the floor and sighed deeply.

"I really hope you're wrong, Tes..."

"I know..."

She had assembled her team quietly and efficiently, and sat them at the one spot she knew no one would listen in on them – her living room. After the initial surprise, coupled with a few choice words from B'Elanna, rolls were assigned and they went about collecting more information and arranging for a small ship for their use as the information handed to her from Admiral Tesler said that their former shipmate was planning on leaving the planet later tonight for a trip of about 24 hours.

The few hours they had to their disposal were spent as each of them contacted anybody who could be relevant to their mission while still keeping it covert, and called in favors to make their journey run as smoothly as possible. "If it's at all possible," Kathryn told them before they dispersed with the promise to meet again later that night, "I want this done by the time we get back to earth."

"Kathryn." Her vid screen came to life moments after she returned to her home to pack a light bag, and she smiled at the woman looking back at her.

"Hello, Seven." The other woman smiled back at her, an edge of uncertainty coloring her features.

"I have been attempting to contact you for 2.65 hours." Her monotone contrasted with her features, making the older woman slightly concerned and she sat down in front of the screen.

"I'm sorry, Seven, I've just been running around headquarters all day trying to deal with a project that was handed to me."

"I see. Would you like my assistance?" Kathryn's face softened, and she smiled at the younger woman. For the first time today, she genuinely smiled.

"Thank you, dear, but as you once said - it is well within my capabilities." Blinking once, she felt the smile leave her features and she regarded the other woman evenly. "I need to go on a short trip, but I'd like to see you after I get back. Would you be free for dinner in two days?"

"Indeed." She paused, clearly debating if to say what she wanted. "Be careful."

"Don't worry, I'm basically a 'poster child', I don't think I'd be sent to look into something that might actually cause me harm." A small glance at the chronometer told her that she needed to head out, and she sighed. "I'm sorry dear, but I need to go. I'll contact you about dinner."

Seven nodded once. "Acceptable." She smiled at the ice blue eyes.

"Not really, but that's a matter of opinion..." Ignoring the suddenly low timber of her voice the auburn haired woman and the blonde said their goodbyes, and within a few minutes she was already out the door and getting into a waiting hovercraft that took her to the hanger that Tom has declared to be their meeting point.

They were off the ground not long after, with Tuvok briefing them all on the additional information that his contacts managed to find on the reason that Chakotay was headed off the planet. "My source could not gather much information within the span of time allotted, but it appears that Chakotay has departed in order to meet with an unknown humanoid, apparently to discuss a trading agreement. However, there is uncertainty as to what the items in that will be traded are." Janeway nodded, she had felt her command mask slip easily into place once they entered the vessel and this briefing was treated just as if it was dealing with any other objective. The fact that they were in reality attempting to hunt down her former second in command had to be pushed away. "Once we dock, I have another acquaintance that is willing to help us locate the meeting spot. With a good plan we might be able to listen in on his plans and figure out if it is a threat to Starfleet."

This was weird and awkward enough going after the man she served with so closely all these years, but add to that that she was now chasing down the former boyfriend of the woman she loved. In some ways it was just... overwhelming. She quieted the little voice in her head and turned her attention back to the others in the room.

"Alright, our major problem is that we are all known. Both to Chakotay, and throughout the galaxy, if not the quadrant. So I want us all to lie as low as possible: that means keeping the known aspects of our faces and voices either covered or changed. We **can not** be outed to him." The trio nodded and after a bit more tweaking to the main plans of action, The auburn haired captain dismissed her crew to get ready for landing.

The chill on this moon made it ease for them to blend in with the locals as they followed the information supplied but Tuvok's contacts into a dimly lit pub, not far from the main business sector. They made their way inside in pairs, each two finding a quiet spot to sit hoping that at least one of the pairs will be close enough to over hear the plans that were to be made without having to relocate themselves.

Sitting down with Tom, Kathryn tried to keep her disquiet at bay by engaging in conversation with the man in front of her. The low tones, and the fact that they leaned closely into one another served as a disguise to their identity as well as the real subject of their conversation – Miral, who was left for the length of the mission with her grandparents.

"Do you think he's really trying something?" Tom asked her softly when she gave the visual confirmation that their target has entered the pub a few minutes after their orders had arrived.

"I don't know Tom, on one hand, I did work with the man for seven years, but then again, in the months since we returned, many things could have happened, and Starfleet wouldn't have sent us here like this if this wasn't something for which they had proof. They could have always sent someone unknown. But for some reason, they want someone with a big name to catch him. Meaning that this is something big, and that they have some very concrete evidence." She pinched the bridge of her nose momentarily, "I really hope they have concrete evidence..."

"His dinner partner has joined." Tuvok's voice came from the sort range communicator that Tom cradled in his hand.

"Then we begin phase two." She answered calmly, throwing a wink and a smile in Tom direction. "B'Elanna, Tom, I hope that you both will excuse me if I'll be forced to do something in order to keep our cover." Tom turned his head a bit to glance sideways at her. "I don't think we'll need to, but I plan on keeping our cover. Now quiet, I want to hear them." She moved to the seat next to Tom as she said the last sentence and was now in a position where she could see Chakotay's companion quite clearly. It was almost enough to be able to read his lips, and not for the first time since the beginning of the mission she wished that Seven had joined Starfleet so that she could have taken her along. She would have been able to read the man's lips, and we wouldn't even have needed to be this close. Clearing her throat she trained her eyes just over Tom's shoulder at the man, attempting to identify his race, if not the man himself.

"The man is a hybrid." Came Tuvok's quiet voice from the communicator. "I can identify phenotypes of four different spices in him. But they are not prominent." Chakotay's companion was clearly unpleased, and his angry tone reached the experienced captain's ears as he chastised the man before him for not keeping up his end of the deal and delivering a package of some sort. She passed the information on.

The minutes ticked by and they sat in their watch, attempting to both blend into the background, and gather information, and the more time they spent inside the dim lights of the establishment the more confused the Starfleet captain had become. The men were talking about some sort of transfer of ownership to something that Chakotay no longer owned. But he did at some point, and when she heard the two men refer to the item in question as though it was a living being for a moment she was thoroughly confused.

It was only after an hour of quiet conversation that a few casual remarks were pieced together. It was a person that they were talking about. Moreover, it was a Federation citizen, and they two were now casually discussing kidnapping that person in order to sell them. "We have the conspiracy – that's enough to charge him. I say we get him as soon as they part ways." B'Elanna, who has kept quite throughout most of the evening, spoke. The low growl emanating from her throat evident over the small communicator. Janeway sighed deeply, her eyes moving to the table top as she ran the information through her head one final time.

"I agree." Motioning to Tom, they stood up and walked, his arm going around her waist as she pretended to away on the way to the counter o pay for their drinks before heading out, their heads low, and their normal stance altered not only to reflect a couple who has been drinking for most of the night, but also a couple who were not Kathryn Janeway and Tom Paris.

Within five minutes, B'Elanna and Tuvok joined them emerging from the back entrance. With the practice that came from countless missions together they set up, and then turned to wait, knowing that they're going to return with what will probably be an unwilling passenger to Earth. Remembering that this was a man who used to be their friend only made it harder, and Kathryn found herself pushing back all thoughts of familiarity and attempting to look at the case as just another objective that needs to be acquired. From the hard set of jaws around her before they dispersed she knew that her friends were feeling the same way.

Luckily, they didn't have to wait long. And Chakotay, not knowing what awaited him was quickly and efficiently paralyzed by Tuvok performing a Vulcan nerve pinch, from there the transporters of their borrowed ship did their work, and with a quiet and somber order, the Captain set them on their way back to Earth.


	10. Chapter 10

"What the..." The man sputtered as he regained consciousness only to find himself facing his former captain.

"Hello, Chakoay." She smiled at him, the small smile never quite reaching her eyes.

"Kathryn?" He sat up slowly, looking confused. "What are you doing here? And where is 'here'?" He added as he looked around the room.

"Starfleet headquarters." Was the laconic reply, as she looked him up and down. "Who are you going to kidnap, Chakotay? And how come they're worth nearly half their weight in Latinum?"

"What? What are you talking about?"

"We heard you Chakotay. Tom, B'Elanna, Tuvok, and I all heard the deal that you struck, we know what's going on. All that's missing is the why, Chakotay."

A few rooms away, two admirals quietly sat and watched the live feed from the room where the famous captain and her former first officer were sitting. They duo kept quiet during the nearly full hour that the woman kept on trying to poke at the man sitting before her, to get him to admit at least a part of the plan or motive, noticing just as she had, the small half truths that amounted to a lie.

But it was only when she threw that fact in his face, counting off his contradicting statements that the man finally snapped at her. "If it wasn't for her sudden and inexplicable desire to break up with me, you wouldn't have known any of this!" Kathryn struggled to keep the shock away from her features.

"If it wasn't..." she shook her head, positive the she was misheard him. "What?" She could almost feel her face drain of color as she contemplated the meaning of her former first officer's words.

"It would have been a vacation." His almost dreaming tone had obvious underlines of a sneer. "I would have gotten her to go and after some complication we would have been forced to call for help. You would have arrived and..." He clasped his fingers together like an old trap snapping shut. "But then, she leaves me, for you of all people." A trap?.. Me of all people? "I really thought you could do better at trying to get her to rethink things, but I appear to have underestimated you again. I always knew you cared. Heck, if you didn't than this whole thing couldn't have taken place. But I never thought you loved her as more than a substitute mother-figure, a mentor" It was only the years of diplomacy that ingrained certain responses in her that allowed her to keep her face neutral, and not let her mouth slowly drop to form a perfect O.

"And what would you have gotten from all of this Chakotay? What trade-off is worth it?" He merely laughed.

"Latinum, of course. Three quarters your weight in pure latinum. " He explained, smirking.

"And to whom were you attempting to sell me to, Mr. Chakotay?" She forced herself not to cringe as he merely laughed again.

"How much is it worth to your precious Starfleet to know this, Captain?" He sneered.

"I am not your captain, Chakotay."

"Oh, but you are... And if you want to know who, out of the... how many planets accept latinum as currency now? My contacts might decide that they just want you badly enough to come and pick up their merchandise from dear old Earth, I suggest that you contact your beloved Starfleet Admirals and get me a good deal, Kathryn." With that, he leaned back in his chair. Oh, I'll get you a deal...

"Do you really think that your contacts will come to San Francisco for me? Or that the admirals will offer you a deal? You tried to kidnap and sell one of the prominent members of Voyager. And you failed. Whichever way you look at this - this endeavor will not bode well for you..." He cut her off.

"You really are that stupid, aren't you? I was taking her away from Starfleet so that you can't use her or her knowledge for your benefit, the bonus of getting paid for getting you to some... zookeepers, or whatever they wanted to do with you was just a nice little way to end it all."

"What?"

"Are you deaf as well as dumb?" Placing his forearms on the table before him, he leaned closer to her, his eyes regarding her intensely. "My plan was to remove Seven of Nine from Starfleet and get rid of you in the process."

"Why? You have fought for Starfleet for seven years before we came back. You and I were friends." She tried her best not to growl the words. "What happened? What changed?"

His face reddened and he gritted his teeth. Kathryn leaned against the wall, facing the seated man, keeping herself fully within the line of his vision. She had time. She had all the time they would need even if this took days.

It took several long minutes before the man all but spat out the words.

"I fought to get back to the alpha quadrant only to discover that I had not home to return to, because my planet, and its inhabitants were nearly all killed in a Cardassian attack that the Federation never even tried to stop!" She attempted to hide her confusion as she was told of an event that she had never even heard of.

"So you planed on kidnapping the woman you love, and selling me to get back at the Federation?" He raised his eyebrows at her, a disbelieving look flashing through his features.

"It was never kidnapping. I was taking her with me. A holiday, a trip to see this part of the galaxy. You were going to be the fat," excuse me? "added bonus. Do you really think that once I discovered the truth about all the dead that I could think of anything except avenging their deaths? What I was going to give them at the end of these six long months was going to help bring this wretched Federation down." She looked at the man sitting before her for a long moment, her face set into an unreadable mask as she counted slowly in order to get her temper out of control.

"What were you going to do to her once you've sold me?" He shrugged.

"Nothing. She wasn't supposed to know anything except that we had trouble and we fixed them. We would have come back and lived our lives. Once I get the latinum, collect the survivors from my planet, and move them somewhere safe where we can all start our lives anew."

"I've heard enough." The sitting man couldn't hide his flinch at Captain Janeway's near-growl as she stood from her chair and headed for the door. "The locks are encrypted and there are armed guards at the door, so don't even try it."

Once out the door and around the corner, the famous Captain stopped and closed her eyes, taking deep breaths as she tried to wrap her head around this turn of events. After all this time, he wanted me to... She shook her head to dispel the thoughts. And to use Seven like that... Another deep breath, and she could hear steps approaching. There were people coming. She was in the middle of Starfleet Headquarters. People moved here.

Suddenly she wanted to get away. To leave, and there was only one place she wanted to go. But there will be things that will need to be done before she could leave, and she would be damned if they'd take more than an hour.

"Captain." Admiral Paris greeted her, his face cold. Admiral Tesler echoed the greeting.

"Admirals. Tuvok." She greeted them in return. "I'm guessing you've heard what he said."

"Yes." The younger admiral replied, looking at Paris and her friends favored security officer and friend before returning her eyes to Janeway. "Lets take it out of the hallway, though."

"Tes... Admiral, please..." She couldn't get more than these few words out before she was cut off by Admiral Paris.

"I understand, Captain, but you agree that this isn't something that we can talk about in a hallway, right?" Her shoulders slumped as she took in the man's words, well aware of the truth in them. "There's a room down the hall, come."

"Since we have all seen and heard what Chakotay had to say, and how he feel in this matter, than I believe the most logical course of action will be to try and find more information without him. Unless you are willing to consider a deal for him?" Never.

"No. If we can charge him without a deal, and get the people that he was in contact with then I think we would all rather we do that, right?" The silver haired admiral didn't even need to look at the people around him to know their answers. " Lieutenant Commander, form a team, you have 48 hours to bring back anything you can find. I would rather you use people who are deployed in the area, but if you feel that you have better people here, then I won't object. However, you need to run their names through Admiral Tesler. But remember – this is as top secret as it gets." Tuvok nodded once.

"Than I shall leave to prepare."

"Sir," Janeway interjected. "I'll go. I can do this."

"You are the one that they want Kathryn. We're not going to just dangle you in front of them." He replied shaking his head. " Lieutenant Commander, you're dismissed." The trio continued looking at the Vulcan's retreating back. "Shame you didn't make that one your first officer and executed the other one."

"Tes!" The auburn haired woman nearly laughed. "I had to, in the beginning, and than, no matter how many shuttles he crashed, he always came through." She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. "Is what he said about his home planet true?"

"Sadly, yes." Admiral Paris answered her solemnly. "Our intel was off, and we were too late to stop them, there were some survivors, but there is still little we can do against radiation pulses and plasma bombs. Even the closest ship was too far away from the moment when the planets sensors first picked the fact that the upcoming ship means them harm." She sighed again and turned to look at the woman beside her.

"So now what? Until Tuvok returns with new information, that is."

"You go home and rest. Since you were the target, we're pulling you off the rest of the case. But, Chakotay knows that we're going to do this, so I think that letting you carry on with his interrogation might throw him off his game. However, it's up to you since we," the blonde admiral glanced at her elder peer, "know how hard this can be for you. And it might get even harder."

"No," Captain Janeway shook her head. "I can deal with this. With him. I'll just need..." She took a breath, her head still spinning slightly. "I'll just need breaks every now and again. Long breaks," she pinched the bridge of her nose, "and coffee."

Both admirals smiled. "We can do that. We thought about sitting you down with him on and off to try and get him to accidentally give us the information. But right now, letting him sit there sounds positively lovely. Let him enjoy his supposed victory a bit before we start raining on his parade." She smiled slightly for a short moment. "Go home. And if I don't see you tomorrow, which probably won't happen, but still – he is not to know that Tuvok, or anyone else for that matter, is gathering information against him." Janeway frowned at her.

"Of course."

"Good. Try and sleep, Kath." She nodded at the two admirals and taking this as her dismissal, left to try and wrap her head around the past few hours' events.

Less then 30 minutes later she found herself on the steps to a familiar building that she has yet to be able to bring herself to enter.

"The table is set, Aunt Irene." Walking into the living room to draw her aunt's attention seemed far more efficient than attempting to shout out the information. The older woman raised her hand in a gesture that the blonde had learned to interpret as asking for a moment to finish the paragraph. Nodding at her once, she turned to return to the kitchen to bring the food to the table when a knock at the door stopped her.

"Now, who could it be at this hour? Could you get it, Seven dear?"

"Of course." Was the almost mumbled, distracted answer as the blonde once again wondered why there was still no word from Kathryn, who had promised that they will dine together on this night. She cleared her head shortly before reaching for the door, only to look at the person standing on the front steps in shock. "Kathryn!"

"Hi, Seven" The smaller woman said before lowering her gaze, her shoulders dropping along with it. "I'm sorry I didn't contact you..." She offered in a small voice before raising her eyes to meet the blue ones before her again. "I just..." Her voice trailed off for a moment, "I needed to see you." Seven smiled at her and reached for her hand.

"I am pleased that you have come. Come in, my aunt and I were just about to sit down for dinner. You, of course, are welcome to join us." Upon hearing this, Kathryn froze mid step.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Seven! I didn't mean to intrude on your time..."

"Kathryn," Seven raised her free hand to stop the other woman, "you are not intruding. I am pleased that you are here, and so will my aunt."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes." Suddenly, the weight of the uniform felt even heavier on the captains' shoulders. A feeling that did not lessen through the brief reintroductions, nor as they sat at the table. I should have figured that it was not going to be just us, not when it's dark outside and I'm at her aunt's house...

It was nearly half and hour later when Irene decided to take pity on the obviously still uncomfortable woman. "Seven, I want to have a private word with Kathryn, would you mind giving us a few moments alone?" Seven raised an eyebrow in response, but after a glance at the woman sitting beside her, who only barely managed to cover her nervousness at the bold statement, and again at her aunt, she nodded her assent and left. "I realize that you are nervous, and I believe I know why, but listen, Kathryn – In the past few days, ever since she had discovered that she can openly love you, Seven has been walking on air. I have never seen her as happy as when she looks at you, and in my book – that is the only thing that counts. But," she leaned a bit forward in her seat, "do you feel the same?"

"I do." Kathryn managed a small smile at the woman across the table. "That's partly why I kept my distance before – I thought she was happy, but seeing them together was... hard." The older woman smiled at her.

"I can understand that. But please, relax."

"I can't. Not yet. Not when I'm half expecting to be summoned back if they find any breaks on the operation that I'm involved in now." She shook her head at Irene's questioning look. "I can't talk about it. Not while it's ongoing."

"Very well." The older woman smiled again. "I can see why she likes you. Lets have desert in the living room. Go in, second door on the left, we'll be there shortly." Kathryn nodded and stood up, wondering at this turn of events as she sat herself on the two person couch a few moments later.

"Kathryn?" The soft voice made her look up, and she smiled softly.

"Sit with me? I need to feel you close..." The taller woman sat beside her, taking the smaller hands in her own.

"What is wrong, Kathryn?" A rueful smile spread for a moment on the Captain's lips and she shook her head.

"I'm under orders not to speak of this yet, so please, don't make this harder than it already is for me. Just... be here?" Seven nodded, a small smile spreading on her lips as she released one of Kathryn's hands to push a lock of hair behind her ear. The auburn haired woman leaned into the gesture, only to raise her eyes to meet the blue ones of Irene looking at them fondly and holding a small tray.

She placed her head on Seven's shoulder as the desert was placed on the table, and Irene took her seat on the nearby overstuffed chair. They all sat together in a comfortable silence that was punctured only by the voice of the anchorman from the station picked by Irene to tell them of the day's events. It was hard for Kathryn to suppress the sigh of relief at the fact that no one has yet picked up on Chakotay's arrest, but now, her head nestled against Seven's shoulder and her arm around the taller woman's waist while the blonde half hugged her, she felt better. Knowing the woman was here, and safe, was pleasing, and after the long hours of flight, surveillance, and then the even more draining interrogation – the innocent, yet intimate touch was comforting.

Knowing that Irene approved was even better, as she knew that she was too old for hiding. Especially now that they had finally managed to find each other, she wanted to write it in the sky.

But first, Chakotay. She unconsciously tightened her hold on the other woman. Things needed to be worked out in regards to him. Her thoughts raced on, concentrating on their relationship and things that they could do as she only half listened to the commentator talking about the preparations for the upcoming festival in Bagor.

Looking down at the woman in her arms Seven couldn't help but smile softly. This week has been full of surprises, and this – Kathryn showing up at her home for the first time. Only that this was the first time that the house really felt like home. She shifted her head a bit, enjoying the feeling of the fine strands of auburn hair against her cheek as she continued to watch the broadcast, wondering at the almost silent mood that the other woman has been in all night. If it wasn't for the mission that she knew that her Captain was still involved with she would have been concerned, but knowing what she did, she could keep her curiosity down.

"Seven, honey?" Her aunt shook her from her reverie in a quiet voice, and she turned her head to look at her. "I think you should find her a bed." The older woman gestured at Kathryn with her chin. Looking down, the blonde noticed the even breathes that she had attributed to a sense of clam similar to her own, were actually evidence that her beloved has fallen asleep.

She nodded at her aunt and bid her a good night before shifting so that she could slide her free hand under the smaller woman's knees and lift her up. Rising the stairs in slow measured steps she took the time up look at the woman in her arms, the auburn head on her shoulders, the relaxed expression, the rhythm of the woman's breathing under the heavy uniform jacket. Only then did it dawn on her that the woman was still in full uniform.


	11. Chapter 11

"This is a mess..."

A dark chuckle from the doorway made the speakers' head snap up. "This is worse than that." Two steps into the room and the newcomer ordered the doors to lock. "They might want your head for this."

The seated figure gulped. "Do you..."

"No." The question wasn't even finished before the short reply came, as the standing figure walked to the room's window "It won't go that far, but they are displeased. Getting The Captain is going to be more difficult now that she is probably aware that we are interested in acquiring her." The standing figure's head turned, making several popping sounds, as black eyes turned to look at the other occupant of the room who cringed a bit at the sounds. "You do realize your problem, don't you Nymor?"

"The renegade human." The standing figure nodded.

"It is very difficult to assess stupidity based on one encounter, and since this was your first attempt, this will be forgiven."

"Am I to attempt again?" The standing figure turned its head back towards the window.

"You are to reassess your information. This mission didn't fail only because of the human's stupidity." It was with closed eyes and a subdued voice that the chastened mumbled a thank you and stood up. "You do need to report back to one of the Collectors by the end of the day."

With that, and a slight rustle of fabric as the one standing by the window turned and left, Nymor was left alone again.

"Kathryn." The redhead opened her eyes and raised her head to get a better look of the room she was in.

"Admiral Paris." She answered by way of greeting, suddenly all too aware of the other people in the room with them. The silver haired admiral motioned for her to stay seated.

"Long morning?" He asked sympathetically, placing a steaming mug of coffee and a sandwich on a plate before her. "Did you at least manage to sleep?"

"Thank you. And yes, on both accounts." He smiled at her, encouraging her to continue. "What's in this?" She pointed at the sandwich.

"Leola root." The silver haired man deadpanned, then laughed as she pushed the plate away, the disgust clear on her face. He pushed it back. "I wasn't serious. It's just your average Peanut-butter and Jelly sandwich. The Jam was made by your mother, by the way."

The redhead offered him a tired smile. "Thank you. Would you like some?"

"I can't, I have a checkup soon and I'm not supposed to eat for two hours before it." The sandwich stopped midway to her mouth.

"Is everything alright?" His response was to shrug.

"You get older... It's a routine checkup." Kathryn nodded, taking a bite, her eyes drifting shut at the pleasurable tastes. "You didn't say how your morning went, or how come you slept so well. I could barely sleep thinking about you." Opening her eyes, she caught the tail end of the almost casual way he swept the room with his eyes.

"I went to see Seven last night." She mumbled into her coffee cup.

"Finally. Go on." She offered him a small smile and took a deep breath before continuing.

"I spent the evening with her and her aunt. We had... fun... I suppose. It was all very homey. And I fell asleep on the couch." She took a moment to tear off a bit more of her sandwich before continuing. "I'm not sure how, but I awoke in a bedroom. Seven probably carried me up the stairs." She turned away from his gaze as her cheeks colored a bit. "So much for that Great Captain image I've spent years cultivating." Admiral Paris sighed.

"Do you really want to be Captain Janeway with her, Kathryn?"

"Probably not, but I'm not sure I remember how to be simply 'Kathryn' either." She tore off another bite from the sandwich.

"Kath," he covered her hand with his, "Don't mount difficulties on yourself. I have seen you two together. More than that – I've heard stories about what you two did back in the Delta quadrant, and I've seen the way you look at each other. You have a true shot at happiness here, Kath, if you don't let your demons hunt it down." The redhead sighed, and tore off another bite from her sandwich. "You realize you're killing the poor thing?" He remarked gesturing at the plate.

"It was dead when it got here." She deadpanned.

"Just think about it." He replied, the small smile playing at his lips already gone. "Now, about your morning talks?" Slate gray eyes and a grim face were turned to meet his own, causing him to shake his head sadly. "That bad?" She nodded as another piece was torn from the sandwich.

"I keep thinking that he has lost some touch with reality – he talks as if there is a race of collectors, like..." She paused, trying to come up with a suitable comparison. "Do you remember collecting holo-images as a child? Well, these people collect the actual people. C... Our charge, was just the middle man. He knows basically nothing. At least as far as I can tell." Sighing she tore a bit more of the sandwich, taking a deep breath before putting it in her mouth and chewing. "Was there any word from Tuvok?" The older man shook his head.

"Not yet, but he is supposed to report in 1600 hours."

"I would like to be there." He nodded.

"_Michelle_ thought you might."

"You and Tes are both on this?" The last bit of the sandwich stopped before it was even fully removed from the plate. In front of her, the admiral nodded. "Why?"

"Personal reasons, the severity of the case, high profile players, I could go on. There are multiple reasons." Captain Janeway raised her hand and pinched the bridge of her nose.

"Lovely..."

"Come to my office at 1530 hours. We'll all meet there, debrief and talk with Tuvok." She nodded.

"Yes, Sir." He placed his hand on hers again as he got up.

"There is going to be security following you until we get to the root of this, Kathryn."

"I figured as much..." She grumbled.

He ignored her.

"They are going to keep some distance, unless you don't want them too. They are competent, and they're for your own good. And no, they won't be seen by... our charge."

"Understood."

"Kathryn..." he sighed, "this in only temporary."

"We don't know that, Owen."

For the first time in a long while Captain Kathryn Janeway had to identify herself before entering a room. When the doors slid quietly open she took a moment to look into Admiral Paris' spacious office, then stepped inside, greeting her two old friends and taking the seat offered to her.

"How are you handling all of this?" The blonde admiral asked her after she sat. Captain Janeway shook her head slowly.

"I can't quite wrap my mind around this... It's," she pointed at the door behind her, "he..." she paused, taking a deep breath. "I trusted him, and this is... It's hard to process this."

The blonde nodded before glancing at the sited man, and back at her old friend. "How about the security, are they ok?"

Her answer was a nod. "They are good kids. I just hate being followed around. I feel like enough of an exhibit since Voyager came back as it is." She raised a hand to stop atop the comments she could see the two were about to utter. "I know that it's needed, and why, and I'm not going to disappear on them." She huffed, "I'm just unhappy about it."

The two other occupants of the room nodded in understanding.

After a short moment of silence the older admiral updated the two women on some of the information that the Fleet researchers managed to dig up based on the behavioral pattern. Kathryn had to clench her jaw after a few minutes to keep the nauseated feeling that was growing at the pit of her stomach at bay.

"Do they ever give up?" She looked at Tes, almost relieved that she didn't need to be the one asking that particular question.

He shrugged, shaking his head. "We're not sure. There were some cases where they seemed to have vanished without taking the target, but again, we are basing ourselves on anecdotal evidence. We can't be sure it was them, and we can't be sure who the targets were. Not to mention the successful abductions..." He sighed. "We are hoping that the non-official contacts will be able to get us a better, and fuller, report on this situation. And that's Tuvok's job."

"Do you think we can catch them? Or stop them in any way?"

"We can try."

The desk's built-in comm. Unit chimed then, alerting the trio to an incoming call, before the thin screen rose from its slot within the desk and Tuvok's face shimmered into view. "Hello Admirals, Captain." He nodded to the trio once the screen was set so that all three could comfortably face it.

"Lieutenant commander," Admiral Paris replied with a curt nod of his own. "Before you start, Computer – set security level of incoming call to eyes only to Paris, Owen; Tesler, Michelle; Janeway, Kathryn, and Tuvok, son of T'Meni.. Authorization: Paris-gamma-three-eight-two."

The computer chirped it's acknowledgement a moment later, and the older Admiral nodded to the man on screen to begin telling his report. It turned out that as predicted, Tuvok's contacts were able to gather more information than was accessible by using Starfleet's official connections. He was able to give them a broad outline of how several planets and organization viewed this group whose existence was almost unanimously denied.

Captain Janeway was quiet through out the Vulcan's report as she took in his words as well as what her old friend did not say, and the little nuances that only someone who knows him could detect.

Taking advantage of a momentary pause, she spoke up; wanting the other occupants in the room to hear what she was suspecting that the dark skinned Vulcan was keeping from them. "Tuvok, tell us this – what are the chances that these people, this organization, would give up and simply disappear?"

He blinked slowly, thinking over her question before answering. "I am not sure." He answered finally. "From what my sources could gather, their field hierarchy is constantly changing, which results in the reemergence of young and inexperienced leaders on occasion. If one of those leaders wished to impress his elders than that could mean trouble for you."

"And the chances for that are high." It wasn't a question.

"They are not low." He agreed.

Admiral Tesler groaned. "So we are going to blindfoldedly go when no ones knows the path?" She shook her head, "splendid."

"Tesler," the older Admiral scolded. "What do you recommend?"

"Controlling the circumstances." Was the short reply. "We know their attack patterns, so we simulate those occurrences. By capturing some of the culprits we might be able to bring down the whole chain."

"And perhaps find a few missing people." The blonde admiral added.

"That is logical." Tuvok agreed.

"Let me get this straight: you want me to pretend to be alone somewhere so that a group of people might kidnap me, in which case Fleet officers, or whom ever chosen for this mission, will storm in and capture them?"

"That sounds perfectly ridiculous when you phrase it that way." Groaning, Captain Janeway placed her face in her hands.

"Than how would you phrase it?" She mumbled from between her fingers.

Taking a deep breath she opted not to repeat herself as Admiral Paris asked, but to change the course of this conversation from linguistics to what she feared the trio working this mission might suggest. "What do you want me to do exactly, and who is going to be there with me? We don't know when these people might strike so I can't just pick two or three people to do this. And I don't want people watching me while I'm sleeping!" In a low grumble she added, "again."

Both admirals shook their heads. "It won't be a two or even three-person team anyway, Kathryn. We won't risk them getting their hands on you." Admiral Paris stroked his chin as he spoke. "I think it would be best if you slept in headquarters, too. Your house is not secure enough to keep people out. And your bedroom is far too easy to get into is someone really wanted to try. "

"Not that easy," the blonde Admiral added with a grin. Three frowns were directed her way and she shrugged, showing her palm in admitted defeat. "Yeah, I know. Wrong time... But I do think you are exaggerating," she turned her eyes to her friend, "but you staying here will make things easier on everyone."

"And before you say anything about it: I'm choosing the team." The older Admiral interjected. "I will update you an hour after we finish up here with tentatives, you tell me if anyone is a problem, and we'll move on from there." He raised his hand to stop her when she started to speak. "Remember – you are not really on this case."

Sighing in defeat, her shoulders sagging, she nodded her acceptance to his words.

It was nearly three hours later that she called Seven from her office to update the younger woman about the events of the day.

"I will be joining you at the Starfleet Headquarters." Was the blonde's clam, yet firm, response.

"Seven..." The redhead started, and then took a deep breath as she recognized the look in the blue eyes. "Setting this up will take a while. You are not a member of Starfleet anymore."

"That is of no concern, Kathryn. I am better suited for this position than any one man: I know the schematics of the Headquarters' complex, as well as protocols of engagement, I do not requite the daily eight hours of sleep dictated by Starfleet protocol, and I also know you, and can predict with a higher certainty than most the manner in which you will respond to this kind of situation." Kathryn smiled at the screen.

"Are you saying that I'm predictable?" She questioned with a small smile tugging at her lips. That smile grew as Seven's ocular implant rose.

"Kathryn, the point that you have chosen to focus on was not amusing."

"I will check with Admiral Paris, but I don't think that they will let you be a part of the team that's going to guard me."

"Than I shall act unofficially in that capacity. I do not want them to capture you."

"They won't, Sweetheart." The older woman put all of her conviction and fighting spirit into those words, "I won't let them."

"I do not want you to die during in case they attack while trying to keep that promise either. I will pack an over-night bag and await Admiral Owen Paris' approval."

"You're very confident that he will give you that authorization, aren't you?" The older woman smiled fondly.

"I have been aware of what a determined Kathryn Janeway can accomplish for over four years now." The former Borg drone returned the smile, and the seasoned Captain could almost feel her cheeks redden.

"I will talk with him." After a few more parting words, they cut the conversation off. When did I become so whipped?

It was dark outside when two Admirals and a Captain, along with a five-person security team met the blonde at the entrance to the café located inside the main building. Greetings and names were exchanged, and Seven turned nearly cold blue eyes towards the two Admirals. "I understand that it is your expectation that the group who are intent on capturing Kathryn would attempt to capture her at the heart of Starfleet command?" She asked almost casually, the rise of her ocular implant the only indication that her question was meant to point out the irony more than to be answered.

Admiral Tesler smiled at her. "Actually, we were hoping that you might want to do us a favor."

"A favor?" The implant rose even higher. "Explain."

"Well," the shorter blonde smiled, "now that you're here, how do you feel about taking this old target to dinner?"

"This old," Captain Janeway's hands planted themselves on her hips as she cut into the older woman's words, "target?" She asked incredulously, her head tilting, challenging her old friend to continue. The blonde admiral waved her hand as if to brush the redhead's words away, her attention not leaving the tall former Borg woman standing before her.

"Well, what do you say?"

"Will Kathryn and I be going to this dinner alone?"

"No. You'll be accompanied from a distance." The two Admirals shook their heads, their words only half a beat apart. Admiral Paris nodded his head towards the men around them as he spoke.

"I see." Was Seven's quiet response before she turned her head to the smaller woman standing beside her. "Would you like to have dinner with me, Kathryn?"

At the sound of the blonde's voice Kathryn allowed her eyes to leave the older woman's face and turn to the blue eyes of the woman she loved. As her gaze shifted, so did the intensity behind it. From disapproving and offended, her gaze softened until by the time she locked eyes with Seven her eyes shone blue and affectionate. Seven smiled back at her. "I would." Kathryn's hands slipped from her waist.

"Good." Admiral Tesler clapped her hands together. The sound drew two slightly confused blue eyes her way. "I've made you reservations at Vincent 's."

"You did?" Kathryn's hands returned to her hips.

"Yes. When Seven got the OK to come. I figured you too would prefer eating out there rather than in here." She pointed at the café with her thumb. Kathryn once again felt her hands slip from her hips at this surprise, and a stray thought wondered if bringing her arms up and down like this might be considered a light workout.

"Thank you, Admiral Tesler." Seven said after a moment, filling in the silence.

"Michelle, please." She replied with a smile before turning to Kathryn. "I like her – she has manners. Now go. You still need to make it back here before lights out since you are sleeping in quarters, and not in issued apartments." Kathryn nodded, and Seven smiled softly a glint in her eye.

"What is it, Seven?" Asked Admiral Paris, noticing her expression

"When I was on Voyager I researched human folklore, and a story that has appeared in several cultures and styles, lasting for many centuries. It was most commonly known as Cinderella, and in that story that was a part where Cinderella's matron would warn her that that the enchantment placed on her so that she could go to an event staged by the royal couple," she waved her hand dismissively, "would end at midnight, so she must return before it. I was reminded of this because Starfleet has issued that same time as 'lights out'."

The soldiers around them gaped, and noticing this, Kathryn chuckled. "I believe you have ruined your 'cold and aloof' reputation with this crowd, Dear." She said with a smile as she placed her hand on the blonde's bicep. Seven didn't need to say a word to show how much this affected her. "Let's go?" At a nod from the blonde, she checked with the leader of the team that was to follow then, and they bid goodbye to the two Admirals.

It wasn't long before the two women, and their nearly unseen entourage made their way to The Night Owl, and the two women were seated, with Vincent making his usual fuss. Knowing that the other woman was attuned to their surroundings allowed Kathryn to relax, what she hoped would make this mysterious group, if they were indeed watching, lover their own guard in response. This way maybe, just maybe, they might be able to put this past them come tomorrow morning. Just don't put too much wishful thinking into that, Katie. If this doesn't happen you don't want to fall flat down on your face... She smiled at the blonde sharing her table.

"You are worried, Kathryn."

"Aren't you?" At the quiet question the blonde reached forward with her hand, interlacing her fingers with those of the woman sitting before her. The ivies at the other woman's back created a contrast that made her hair and made the color of her eyes stand out even more. She took a moment to really think about her answer before speaking; knowing that the older woman doesn't need empty reassurance.

"I am. But I also trust in my abilities, and in your own. After countless away missions on Voyager, how could I not? And the group that Admiral Paris and Ad... Michelle," she corrected herself, "have sent with us seem to be competent. I do not believe that they would have been chosen to guard you if they were not the best that they could find."

Kathryn nodded at that. "They are of the best in their field that could have made it here in the allotted time. But there are always things that you can't predict. Especially since we don't know the people we're going to face. Or if they are going to show up for that matter! I just want this to be behind me."

"As do I, Kathryn." The older woman tightened her hold on the other woman's fingers momentarily. Removing her eyes from the blue ones before her she let her gaze sweep the restaurant once again, trying to see, or even feel, if there was danger at hand.

"I'm not being very good company, am I?" She stated with half a smile when her eyes returned to the woman seated in front of her.

"Considering the circumstances, you are doing far better than expected." Kathryn couldn't help but laugh.

"Considering the circumstances, eh? I think I'll still take it as a complement."

"You should." The blonde agreed, "you are under a lot of stress, most people would be feeling the strain from this..." she paused, trying to think of a suitable word.

"Endeavour; event; baiting?" The redhead helpfully suggested.

Seven raised her eyebrow.

"Endeavour would be fine." She surmised flatly. "Yet you have managed to appear at ease and perhaps also enjoy the meal while knowing that you are in fact serving as a," she passed momentarily, "bait."

"I'm trying mot to think about it." Was the grumbled answer. "I think I'm ready to go back though. Do you mind?" After a shake of the blonde's head, Kathryn called Vincent for their check and the two were soon heading out, back to the quiet city streets.

"How obvious do you think our tail is?"

"We do not have tails, Kathryn." The blonde replied without missing a beat. "None of the members of the Hominoidea Superfamily have them."

Kathryn turned her head slowly towards her companion and blinked at her once before chuckling softly. "It's amazing that you can recall a centuries old and nearly forgotten folk-tale in a manner of moments, and yet this expression escapes you." She said fondly. "A tail means the people following us. Just as all of Earth's creatures have their tails behind them."

Seven nodded in understanding. "I can tell you their precise locations if you wish."

This alarmed the seasoned Captain. "You can tell where they are? That means that if anyone is also following us than they can detect them too, doesn't it?" She frowned. "This is not good."

Seven shook her head. "They will not find them if they are not looking for them." At the smaller woman's confused look she proceeded to explain, "I was not looking for our tail, as you phrased it, with my eyes Kathryn. I have enhanced my hearing by 0.128 in order to listen to any moment that matches ours. Since the ambient light does not allow me to monitor more than a minimal amount of movement within the shadows, I can not tell for certain if all of our followers are our issues Starfleet escort, but I considering that there are in fact only five that are currently tailing us," this phrasing earned her a smile and a nod from her companion, "then I believe that is a distinct possibility."

"I see." Kathryn responded, the smile still tugging at her lips. "But there is the hypothetical possibility that you're wrong and that the ones trailing us are not friend, but foe."

"Indeed." The younger woman agreed. "There is also the possibility that they will try to beam you across to their ship." Kathryn paled a bit at that. "But that is why I have been holding you the way that I have." Confused, Kathryn took a moment to really look at the way they were walking. They stood close together, so close in fact that her right side was pressed up fully against Seven's left, resulting in her looping her arm behind the taller woman's back. Seven did the same and held on to her waist with her mesh-covered hand.

"I don't understand." She stated, then added, "we've walked this way before. To the restaurant, I mean."

Seven nodded. "Borg implants can be made to resist teleportation. So far, my nano-bots allowed it, but considering these currant events, I have made a small alteration that will make it impossible to beam me, or anyone who is in close enough range."

The redhead seemed shocked "So you knew about us going out to Vincent's before you came here?" She paused in mid step, causing Seven to stop with her, confused. "Does Starfleet know of this ability?" Seven chuckled softly.

"No, on both accounts. This alteration is a minor one that only needs the data-node's interface with the nano-bots., not other alterations were necessary. Considering the circumstances I did however make it before I have left Aunt Irene's house. And as for your other question: I am not sure."

Kathryn nodded. "Let's go. I don't want to be out here in the open any longer than is manderoty." Seven nodded her agreement, and they were once again on their way.

Neither woman aware of the figure looking at them as it lay on a rooftop several houses away.


	12. Chapter 12

"Note that the blonde woman is with her now." Was whispered into the comm.

"That is of no consequence." Was the quiet reply. "We proceed according to the scenario in which she is accompanied, and assume the worst."

"Sir," the figure on the roof silently huffed, knowing that tone after applying it several times themselves, "they have managed to block our transporter beam. It has no effect at all."

The second voice swore.

"Keep your stations, we might need you to drop and go."

"Yes, Sir." Came the slightly relieved reply. The line silenced for a moment.

"This changes the plan a bit, Sir."

"Not really. The blonde Borg woman is the one responsible for that failure. I have read of this ability of theirs. Remove Captain Janeway from her, and we shall have her."

"Yes, Sir." The comm. line disconnected and the dark clad figure sighed. "This is monumentally stupid..." Was mumbled into the night air as figure repositioned itself so that when the signal came, the attack could be executed faster.

Several stories below, on the street, five others were carrying a quiet conversation about the two women over a different frequency of their communication devices.

"Do you think she can spot us?"

"If she would have, she would have said something. From what I've heard of her she wouldn't let something like this just pass."

"Yeah, but do you really think she's that good?"

"Captain Janeway seems to think so."

"Captain Janeway seems to think..."

"Would you two shut up?"

"Sorry, Sir..." the two responses were uttered in hushed, chastised, tones.

"Just keep on eye open. We'll be able to talk with them once this threat is over." Two heads spotted each other in the darkness and tilted, as if agreeing.

"Now!" The command was spoken softly into a comm. device and seven dark figures ran out from various entry-ways and darkened corners.

"No! It's too soon!" The figure on the roof straightened in alarm as the two women below stopped, then quickly turned so that they now stood back to back against their attackers. More people came running and the figure cursed quietly before moving to climb down the building to help.

On the street below the Starfleet officers drew their phasers as they ran towards the two women who were quickly being surrounded. "Remember – stun only! If anyone exceeds that I'm taking them to a disciplinary hearing!" Acknowledgments were made and the uniformed team ran on. Shouting to the other group as they approached.

Five of the attackers turned to face the oncoming men and women leaving two to deal with Janeway and Seven.

When asked later what has happened in the 15 minutes that followed, Kathryn could never answer for sure, since her focus seemed to be in three places at once, and when noticing the figure climbing lowering itself up side down along the front of a building by using only its hands and feet - at four.

She was aware that their escort drew most of their attackers and managed to subdue them, with only a few injuries. One of those being a phaser burn that tore straight through a leg, leaving a hole behind. The officer supporting it grinned at her when she came to see him at the medical bay, claiming that he could actually see through his leg at one point. The nurse standing by him at the time clucked her tongue at his demeanor.

The only two things that she was she was able to say for sure were that she nor Seven separated enough so that Seven's protective influence against beaming would wear off, thus leaving an entire side vulnerable. The other was that the being that climbed down the building and flipped down when reaching a suitable height was a complete surprise, as it did not rush to aid their attacker, but to stop them, barking orders in a lisping dialect that she could not identify at the time.

Their attackers, if they could be called as much, since other than rushing up to them and drawing small weapons that she could not identify, did nothing once they registered the presence of the odd climber. Seven was not as dumbfounded as she though, and with a nudge, got them to move, resulting in two men lying face down before she was fully aware that they were running.

The climber was soon held against Seven's body, as he tried to make an escape. Only then did she register that the figure was not a humanoid, but some reptilian race. Their Starfleet issued followers contacted Headquarters, informing them of the situation and asking for medical help, then joined the two women and Seven's captive. Allowing her to remove her hands from him, and to wrap both around the smaller woman.

"Kathryn, are you alright?" The blonde questioned, a concerned look in her eyes, and the implant covering her eyebrow rising as she spoke.

"I'm fine." She answered as she watched the climber struggle a bit with its captors. "Stunned. I don't understand why though, I've been through similar, and even worse, situations before." She watched as tan scales glistened against the scant light as the captive continued to struggle, even as it soon came to the conclusion that it was pointless and gradually lessened the intensity of its struggles.

Seven looked at her concerned. "You were stunned?"

Kathryn nodded.

"I felt unable to move. Like when in a nightmare." Her voice was low as she attempted to keep their conversation private. She didn't know any of their guards, and didn't think that they should be made aware of this situation. The shake of her head was almost imperceptible. "This is not good, Seven."

"I agree, Kathryn. But you must not forget that the meat in the meal that we have shared was cooked with wine. The alcohol might have affected you." The redhead frowned, her posture made it clear that she didn't agree with a word that the other woman had said.

"Did you ever heat up alcohol Seven? It vaporizes. I doubt that there was enough alcohol in there to get a mouse tipsy, let alone get **me** drunk enough so that my reflexes fail..."

Seven nodded thoughtfully. "You do not wish for them to know." She stated. Her eyes giving the only indication as to whom she spoke of.

"No, I don't. But this makes the transition into being an Admiral all that easier – if I'm loosing my reflexes when in action I can be a danger to myself and others. A captain should never be in that situation." She sighed. "I really didn't want my last field memory to be like this..."

"Kathryn, you are being overly dramatic."

The seasoned captain grinned roguishly then, "I know. It felt fitting." Threading her fingers with those of the taller woman she moved towards the other members of their escort, before the others would come.

"Is it a he or a she?"

"What difference does it make?" A second, lower voice asked.

"I'm just curious." A heavy sigh was heard from behind the door.

"Michelle, it really does **not** matter." At that she raised her hand to the chime that would announce her presence. "Enter," was soon heard from inside the room.

"Hello Michelle, Owen." Kathryn smiled at the two. "I take it you were talking about our lizardma... reptilian friend?"

"I wouldn't call him a friend so soon if I was you." The seated Michelle said, gesturing at an unoccupied chair for her friend. "Him," she corrected, her brows furrowing, "it." She concluded, waving her hand in dismissal.

"Why not?" The redhead decided to ignore the momentary grammatical confusion and turned her eyes to each Admiral in turn.

"Well," Owen chimed in, "it seems that... it wasn't coming to your rescue so mush as for his friends aid by trying to get them to run with him."

"It." The blonde corrected with a grin. The older man shot her a dirty look. "You insisted. This could all be solved very easily."

"Why are we discussing gender, again?" Kathryn spoke to try and derail the conversation from the course it was now taking.

"Well, there are two reasons:" Michelle explained as she leaned back in her chair. "Talking about... the reptilian as an 'it' annoys me, and grammatical discussions annoy him," she pointed at Admiral Paris with her thumb, "so it seemed like a good way to pass a few minutes until you came along."

"I was here for most of it."

"Details..." The blonde admiral waved her off with a smirk. Owen huffed.

"So what do we do with... it... now?"

"We are going to interrogate it, and see what we can find out and if you have to keep you under security."

"Didn't you say that it would be until the ceremony that will make me an Admiral?"

The older admiral cleared his throat uncomfortably. "We are hoping that is the case. You see, if they collect for the artifact's sake, than any 'damage' to that artifact will lead to a lesser value. Wanting a Captain and getting an Admiral is probably a bad thing for them."

"Is **probably**? An **artifact**?" The redhead couldn't help raising her voice. "Owen, we're..."

"I know Kathryn." Her cut her off, "trust me, I know. But you must also understand that I'm trying to keep my emotions out of this – I can't keep thinking about this as though they want **you**. That might drive **me** mad! And then nothing will be done."

"Hey!" Michelle chimed in.

Kathryn couldn't help but chuckle. "You could swear we're all adolescents..." The older man smiled at her.

"We are, in a way." Michelle concurred. "It must be all that running around with people half, or a third, our age." She paused for a minute, looking thoughtful. "Which reminds me: Seven told me about last night." Owen froze at the words. "Relax, it's nothing like what you're thinking. Seven doesn't seem the type to do that anyway." She paused to collect her thoughts. "She thought that your 'freezing in action' last night might be kept out of your report, but that we should be aware of it."

Kathryn sighed. "I thought she might do that. But it was in the report."

"I know," Owen chimed in, "I've already read it. I'm just sorry we didn't send you directly to medical last night so that could test your blood for any foreign substances. I fear that most of what you had in you last night must have already disappeared or returned to normal levels." He frowned and leaned back in the chair.

"Perhaps Doc can figure something out." Kathryn suggested.

"Perhaps, but I wouldn't count on that too much." Michelle chimed in.

"When will we know? If I am to continue walking around with an escort, that is." She chose to change the subject, Doc's discoveries where out of the realms of her influence even back in the beginning of their run on Voyager, so there was no point of continuing along this path.

"We're hoping that it'll be sometime this week. But you can never tell. You know this, Kath..." Michelle's tone was almost reprimanding, but the sad, tired undertones took the sting out of it. "You also know that we are showing you professional courtesy by telling you this. You are not officially on the case."

"I **am** the case!" Getting mad, Captain Janeway cut the other woman off.

"No," Admiral Paris looked at her gravely, "an attempted kidnapping is the case. You are unfortunate enough to be the intended victim."

"I'm unfortunate enough to be myself?" She questioned with a raised eyebrow.

"In this case – yes." The older Admiral sighed. "You need to go on as though all is normal, as though nothing has happened, you did not leave the planet, Chakotay is still a good man, and your escorts do not exist." The redhead huffed. "I'm serious, Kathryn. Go to the office they allotted for you, go see your girlfriend. Trust us." He added after a small pause.

"I hate this helplessness..." She felt herself deflate right in front of the two.

"I know." This from Michelle, who reached forward with her hand and placed it on her friend's knee in reassurance. "But this won't take long..."

"You can't promise that." Kathryn argued, stopping the blonde mid sentence.

"No, But Owen and I are promising to do our best so that it will end quickly and for good. You can trust that, us, can't you?"

"That's a cheap shot, Tesler."

The blonde shrugged as she leaned back, removing her hand. "Maybe, but think about it – do you?" She questioned again, an eyebrow rising. "You don't have to answer me out loud, but think about it – does it calm you at all when you know that Owen and I are on this case and are doing out best to end it?"

Kathryn sighed before pinching the bridge of her nose. "You know it does." Her hand lowered itself slowly to her lap. "But this is not about that," she was almost pleading for them to understand. "I feel helpless. There is nothing I can do to help myself and I **hate** that!"

"What do you think would happen if the general public knew that you were being targeted? You are the resident miracle worker, Kath, certain people might decide to take this matter into their own hands in order to "protect" you. There are enough crazy people out there." The redhead leaned back in her chair and looked up at the ceiling as she took a deep breath, not daring to voice the other fanatic option running through her head, before lowering her eyes back to Owen Paris. She took in his warn features, the circles under his eyes, the hunched set of his shoulders, and felt miserable.

"I'm not a Vulcan, Owen. I understand the logic here, but that doesn't mean that I like it and don't wish to do anything in my power to be able to stop this."

"You're not on your own here, Kathryn." The white haired man replied.

"I know that." Getting up and walking to the window, Kathryn, closed her eyes and rubbed at her eyes, her back remaining to the other two occupants of the room. "Logically – I understand everything, the course of action, your motives, and your choices. I get it. But emotionally – this whole thing is tearing me to pieces." She straightened a bit more and grasped her elbows behind her back. "Not being able to deal with this threat to me makes me feel like a ghost of how I was back on Voyager."

Behind her, Michelle sighed. "Kathryn..." Quickly turning around and raising her hand, the red haired Captain stopped her with a raised hand.

"Look at this objectively, Michelle: I'm keeping low, barely showing my face, but people can hear the things that I do..." This time she was the one to whom a hand was raised to stop the flow of words. She turned her eyes back to Owen

"Kathryn, stop." He said as he stood up from his chair. "We can't put you in this, since if anyone is too close – it's you. Michelle," he gestured at the still seated woman who now looked up at him, "and I barely managed to get into this ourselves. All we are asking you is for your trust. That you believe us when we say that we're doing the best we can. Michelle, myself and Tovuk. I'm not going to ask you to relax, but only that you trust us. We don't want anything bad to happen to you, and we're doing the best we can to insure that."

The standing woman could feel her shoulders sagging. "You're not playing fair." She accused with a small half smile.

"You are the one who took this out of the rational and into the emotional." He countered.

A short silence stretched on before Janeway sighed in defeat. "I do trust you. All three of you. Each of the three of you." She corrected herself. From her place on the chair, Michelle sighed in relief. "I think I'll leave, if you don't mind. I don't have any projects on my desk right now, and staying here when I have nothing to do will drive me mad."

Both Admirals nodded.

"Call Seven." Michelle added. "You shouldn't be alone right now."

"I have my escorts." Was the sarcastic reply, before the standing woman sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose again. "I'm sorry, that was uncalled for. I think I will," she grinned, "unless you're going to order me, then I'll probably refrain just to spite you."

The seated blonde crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow. "Really?" She challenged, "you do realize that I outrank you now, don't you?"

"Not for long." Was the playful response before the Captain visibly deflated again. "You must think I'm going through some split personality disorder..." She turned her eyes to Owen as she spoke.

"I was thinking more along the lines of some manic-depressive episode where the shifts are fast and the peaks, on either side, are low." He deadpanned. "You can call her from here if you like."

"You have made yourself at home here I see." Michelle smiled at the older man, but when she turned her eyes to Janeway she gestured at her desk, the invitation clear in her eyes, and in the small smile that accompanied them.

"Thank you." She said sincerely.

She kept the conversation with Seven short, making sure the younger woman knew that there were two others in the room as a mean to explain this decision. They soon decided to meet at Kathryn's house in an hour, thus giving the redhead enough time to reach home and even shower and change if she wished. When they ended the call Kathryn looked up at her old friends and superiors and smiled. "Thank you." She said again.

"Don't mention it." Michelle brushed her off. "Now go." To the woman's retreating back she added, "and get a bottle of wine for your meal." Kathryn just shook her head and chuckled.

It was already dark outside when Seven made her way to Kathryn's door and used the chime to alert the older woman of her arrival. From inside came the sound of a pan falling to the floor, and a few moments later, she could hear footsteps heading her way.

When Kathryn opened the door, she was already supporting a bright smile, but Seven noted that it could not completely erase the worn out look from the older woman's features. "Good evening, Kathryn."

"Good evening, Seven," came the reply as the redhead stepped aside to allow the younger woman to pass, "please come in." After ending the conversation with the two Admirals, with her friends, Kathryn had returned home to shower, and get ready for her dinner with Seven, opting to take a chance and cooking for the other woman and spending the evening indoors, rather than going out again. Stopping along the way to pick up groceries she knew that she will have to keep her shower short if she wanted to be able to answer the door, rather than be under the spray of water when the blonde arrived.

So she rushed. Showering only long enough to be clean and them moving to the kitchen to get out all the things that they will need to prepare this meal. When the doorbell rand she was reaching high above her head for a frying pan, and the surprise caused her to jump, and the cookware to clatter to the floor, missing her head by only a few centimeters.

Picking the pan up, she placed it on the counter and moved towards the door, rubbing the slightly sore spot the stainless steel appliance left on her shoulder. She couldn't help but smile when she saw the younger woman, dressed in navy slacks and a light champagne shirt. In her mind, she couldn't help but think of the woman's old biosuits, and how even after all these months she still marveled at the change from the way the tall woman looked in the ever tight suits to the way she looked now, wearing casual clothes.

It felt as though ages had passes from the time she opened the door until the time Seven's quiet, "Good evening, Kathryn" shook her from her reverie. Feeling almost chastened she replied with a warm greeting of her own.

"Good evening, Seven," and the two were soon making their way into the kitchen.

"I thought we might stay in tonight," Kathryn explained as she led the way, "if you don't mind, of course." Seven shook her head slightly in response.

"I do not. Were you planning to prepare a meal for us?" She asked by way of making conversations when they reached their destination and she saw the groceries and cookware laid out.

"I thought we might prepare it together, if you'd like." Kathryn replied, smiling fondly at the look of surprise that passed over the taller woman's face.

"I believe I would like to watch you cook." Was the quiet answer. "I remember stories about your lack of domestic abilities from our days on Voyager." The redhead grimaced as she reached for an apron.

"Yes, well," she shrugged, pulling the top strap of the geometric patterned cloth over hear head and bending down to look for the second apron to give Seven. "I'm not good at replicating elaborate meals,"

"Or coffee." Seven countered, "that is not too hot for you to drink."

"That is actually intentional." Gray-blue eyes darted a look over her shoulder as she finally found what she was looking for and pulled it out, handing it to the blonde. "Only if you want to join me with the cooking." She gestured with the piece of fabric in her hand. Seven shook her head, a small smile forming at her lips.

"I think that I would prefer to watch you as you cook." Kathryn shrugged, putting the second apron away before tying the cords of the one she wore, trying to ignore all the stains that she knew were on it rather then pick at them, or working without her apron, something that she figured was not wise. "Why did you intentionally program the replicators to produce coffee that is too hot for you to drink right away?" The blonde prompted, trying to set their conversation back on track.

"Winters are cold were I grew up." The older woman started to explain as she moved about her kitchen preparing the vegetables and meat. "I'm thinking of stir frying the vegetables, and grilling this," she pointed at the chicken breasts that lay in a case on the counter, "is that ok?" She returned to their original topic after Seven agreed. "Since it was so cold, especially in the mornings, Mother used to make us hot chocolate, or tea, and when we grew up and began to drink coffee, then that was the morning beverage of choice. A part of the family's fall and winter morning waking up ritual was always having a mug of steaming beverage to warm our hands with, and the drink itself to warm our insides." She recalled with a smile as she chopped some of the vegetables on a cutting board. "So ever since I was a kid, holding a hot mug relaxes me, takes me home. It was the most tangible piece of Earth that I had while we were out there." She shrugged as she said the last sentence, and then added after a small moment of silence, "did you develop any kind of traditions like this with your aunt?"

It's good to see how much progress she's made over the past few months. I don't remember her participating in small talk even towards the last bit of time we had at the Delta quadrant, not that we talked much back then. She sighed internally. And after we came back I was so busy trying not to feel anything while she was in the same room as I, that I didn't pay a whole lot of attention to what was going on during the conversations. At least that time is over now. She smiled at her guest as she turned the heat up under the wok, and waited a few moments for the oil to heat up before carefully placing the vegetables inside and pulling the condiments so they were easier to reach.

"Kathryn," Seven asked during a lull in the conversation, when the older woman was already working on the meat, "you have not spoken of the attempt to capture you. Have Admirals Paris and Tesler ordered you not to discuss this at all?"

The redhead sighed. Knowing that this question would come did not prepare her for the actual moment of having to answer it.

"No," She replied finally, over the sizzling sound of the meat meeting the cast iron frying pan. "They didn't say anything like that, not about you anyway." She hastened to correct. "I'm not supposed to talk about it to people outside of Starfleet, but you were in on the whole operation all along, so you are different." She smiled at the taller woman. "The truth is that there is nothing much to tell. We don't know who the Reptilian was working for, we don't know why he..." she paused for a short moment, remembering the conversation she first stepped into between the two Admirals, "we're not sure if it's a he, a she, or an it so we can refer to it correctly, and we don't know what made it," she gestured vaguely with her hands as she spoke the last word, "try and stop the two who were aiming a phaser at us. This whole thing has so much more questions then answers, and Owen and Michelle, and to figure everything out tomorrow, tonight, if that's at all possible, so that things would be able to go back to being normal so that I can live in peace." She sighed. "I want that too. I want to know that I don't have to have this escort and look over my shoulder."

"But you find the chances of this happening soon to be unlikely." Seven supplied.

"Very unlikely." She sighed again, her shoulders drooping.

She only looked up again when she felt a warm body press behind her. "Careful, dear, I don't want to get you stained." Ice blue eyes looked down at her and full lips curved into a smile.

"I have researched same sex relations very thoroughly since discovering that there was no taboo against it in Earth society." Kathryn narrowed her eyes in confusion. "There appear to be a lot of phrases that are used that have multiple meanings." Seven's small smile broadened into a smirk as she placed her hands on the smaller woman's waist and felt the slight shiver that took over Kathryn's body. "You have just said one of those sentences."

"Oh?" Seven could only remember one time when Kathryn's voice was this low, "and what was the second meaning?" She challenged.

"When a woman is aroused," came the almost clinical explanation, "her body produces fluids, these..." Kathryn couldn't help but start laughing, and Seven's voice trailed off.

"I'm sorry, Seven." She said between the peals of laughter that shook her body even as she tried to take deep breaths and calm herself down. Finally she took a big breath, wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, and removed the last piece of meat from the pan, shutting off the heat with her other hand. "I just haven't heard such a clinical description of this since middle school's sex class. I think I understand what you mean though."

"So you do not intend..."

"To make you wet?" The redhead cut into her words. "On the contrary, I would enjoy it very much of you were... wet... for... me." She paused a bit after each word, a lazy smile tugging at her lips, wanting the woman before her to be as affected as she was by their proximity. Wanting the younger woman to be wet, but also wanting to step slowly, just in case the blonde wasn't ready. "Getting your blouse stained, while having the effect of getting you out of your clothes will be lovely, but we still have dinner." She added, the lazy smile firmly in place.

Seven backed a way a bit, nodding her head, and looking at the floor for a brief moment, before looking up again and meeting the gray-blue eyes of the woman before her. "I shall help set the table." Not sure if this was a statement of fact or a question, Kathryn nodded, and showed the other woman where the plates and utensils were located.

Taking a deep breath, she placed the food on a couple of plates and headed out of the room and into the dining room to join Seven who was just finishing setting the table.

The blonde looked up as she entered the room, frowning in confusion at the plates she held in her hands. "Serving plates," she explained with s mall smile, "we can take the food from them. This way if one of us wants a second helping, it's easier to get it."

"I see."

"Seven..." The redhead found herself faltering.

"Kathryn, I am worried about you."

The smaller woman was moving before she even registered her brain giving the command. "Thank you, Seven." She responded as she wrapped her arms around the blonde's waist. "I mean it." Tilting her head up she caught the light colored eyes of the woman standing so close to her, and couldn't help the fond smile. "You being here; saying this, means so much to me."

The taller woman smiled as she brought her arms around Kathryn and pulled her gently closer. "I am glad." Was the quiet response, before the two women closed the distance between them and kissed.

It was a few moments before Kathryn pulled slightly back, her head spinning, and her breathing hard. "I think..." She paused to swallow deeply against what she saw in the blue eyes before her. "I think we should eat first, before the food gets cold."

Seven nodded in agreement, reluctantly removing her arms from about the other woman's waist.

Dinner went by quickly as the two engaged in quiet conversation. Being overly happy and loud didn't seem to suit either woman's mood, nor the knowledge that there were guards outside that might burst in if they thought that the women were in some sort of distress. After the plates were cleared for food, and removed to the kitchen sink for later cleaning, the two took a seat on the love-seat in Kathryn's living room, the older woman finding herself again in the crook of Seven's arm. And as the two women continued to talk and bridge the gap that had started on an evening spent in the Delta Quadrant, Kathryn found that she was drawing abstract patterns on the fabric of Seven's pant leg, and would stop, placing her palm against her own leg, only to realize a few minutes later that her hand has resumed its previous activity.

"Seven," she raised her eyes to the younger woman during a momentary lull in the conversation, "I'm sorry." She didn't wait for the questioning eyebrow to rise before she continued. "I think you should leave. It's just that I can't seem to be able to be able to control myself where you're concerned," her hand lifted a bit then returned to its previous spot on the other woman's thigh as though proving the point, "but I don't want to rush you. I know that with Chakotay you didn't want to..." her voice faltered, "and I won't push." She sighed and shook her head.

"It is not... up to you, Kathryn." Seven responded calmly. "It is true that I did not desire to be intimate with Chakotay, but you and he are not the same." She gestured with her chin to the arm wrapped around the older woman's shoulders. "I have never done this with him."

"He was not smaller than you, and I doubt he needed much comforting in the past six months."

"He did." Seven contradicted. "When he discovered the fate of his home planet. But he did not want this kind of comfort. When he had discovered what had happened to his home world he wanted to take comfort, not receive it. I did not remain with him long that night and had avoided meeting with him alone for the next several days I believe he wanted to copulate, and I do not believe that that would have been an enjoyable first time for me." She threaded her fingers with those of the smaller woman. "However, I do not believe that this will be the case with you."

"Seven..."

"I will stay tonight." The blonde declared, ignoring the interruption. "I agree with you that we should not consummate our relationship tonight, but it is not because of the reason that you think. I wish to be with you. But I still do not wish for my first time to be..."

"Less than perfect?" Kathryn interrupted.

"With six members of Starfleet surrounding the house." She corrected. Kathryn could only mouth 'oh' as she took in the taller woman's words.


	13. Epilogue

~A week later~

Kathryn bid the person on her screen goodbye and stood up from her desk. "Seven?"

"I am in the kitchen." The redhead nodded to herself and headed further inside the house to find the other woman. Upon reaching the kitchen she stopped and leaned her shoulder against the door frame, placing her hands on her hips and crossing her legs at the ankles.

"Michelle just called. They want me to come in, and she invited you to join." The blonde nodded.

"It is about time that she or Owen Paris would call you."

"Don't start, dear." She chided, "When can you be ready to leave?" Kathryn added, her tone hinting at her impatience.

"3.2 minutes, if you help me put this away. I need to wash my hands, and put my shoes on."

"3.2 minutes it is then." The smaller woman replied with a smile as she stepped into the room, sharing a brief kiss with the other woman as she headed to the counter.

It was 25 minutes later that they were stepping into the familiar office of Admiral Michelle Tesler. "Took you long enough!" The woman exclaimed with a bright smile. Kathryn shook her head.

"Hello to you too. Owen, Tuvok." Greeted the two men. While waiting impatiently for the rounds of greetings to pass, she placed her hands on her hips. "So, what is the progress, Tes?"

"We have them." The woman announced with a smirk.

"We have them?"

"We have them." The woman repeated, sounding smug. "Your old man here," she gestured at Tuvok, "and his team did excellent work and we have their coordinates and a team just waiting for Tuvok so that they can bring them there."

Kathryn could feel her jaw dropping. "You do?"

"Yes Kathryn," Owen Paris chimed in, "the thing is, there is something that we need to do before we tell them to go, and we both thought that you would prefer to be here to whiteness it."

"What is it?"

"You'll see." The seated woman replied as she got to her feet. "Tuvok, stand up please."

The redhead couldn't help the tears that sprang to her eyes as two of her friends made the man she trusted most not only a Lieutenant, but a full Captain. "You deserve it, old man." Tuvok merely raises an eyebrow at Admiral Paris at that statement.

"I do not believe that this is following protocol."

"Neither was your layover at the Delta Quadrant. You're more than deserving, and once Janeway here fastens the pip to your neck it'll be official too." She smiled warmly at the two comrades. "Unless of course you would rather someone else did that for you?"

Tuvok looked stoically at his former Captain before returning his eyes to the blonde Admiral standing next to him. "I would be honored, Kathryn." She smiled at her old friend, her hands going to her own collar as she moved closer to him, removing one of her pips.

"Here," she murmured as she fastened the pip to his collar, "congratulations, Captain Tuvok."

"Thank you, Kathryn." He responded kindly.

"No please – go get those bastards." He tilted his head a bit before nodding and turning to the two Admirals.

"Leave," Michelle spoke before the Vulcan before her could even open his mouth. "Bring them all back. Dead or alive. Preferably alive."

"Yes, Admiral." He agreed before smartly snapping to attention and leaving the room.

"I think you'll need this for the week than." Michelle handed Kathryn the pip she led in her hand.

"Thank you." The redhead smiled. "'For the week'?"

"Yes." Came the smiling response. "Surprise, Vise Admiral to be. The ceremony is Thursday." Kathryn blinked.

"How did Tuvok..." She paused, closing her eyes as she all but fell into a vacant chair. "Please tell me how we got to this point." Owen Paris nodded, exchanging a glance with Seven who moved to sit beside the smaller woman.

"Old fashioned detective work. Both Chakotay and Nymor, our Reptilian, were questioned numerous times, and it was just a matter of picking up the pieces and placing them together. He is a master interrogator, Tuvok."

"He logiced it out of them, didn't he?" The two admirals smiled. "Was it really as thought? They wanted me as some sort of trophy?" The blonde Admiral's face grew stony and she huffed.

"You really don't want to know." The blonde said, her shoulder twitching.

"Michelle..."

"No." The older woman stopped her coldly; her tone bearing a threatening tone. "Trust me when I say – you do not want to know. Maybe a few years from now when this is old and past us... Right now... you really don't want to know."

Kathryn tilted her head a bit as she looked long and hard at her old friend, while Michelle looked her back in the eye, keeping her expression as stern as it was before. It was only after a few moments that the redhead nodded, closing her eyes as she did so. "I'll accept that, for now." Michelle sighed with relief, her shoulders relaxing a bit.

With Michelle perched on her desk, Owen Paris claiming her chair behind it, and Kathryn and Seven seating before them they turned to talk about the details for the upcoming ceremony that will turn all the Starfleet members in the room to being Admirals.

But despite the change in topic, the happy thoughts that the rise in ranks and the ending of the whole affair brought with it. Despite having Seven at her side, Kathryn knew that this episode wasn't over. It would only end when she knew once and for all why this phantom organization wanted to capture her.

End.

Perhaps..


End file.
